Icivics wanted a just right government

I'm 600 days sober tomorrow. 599 days ago I woke up in the hospital and they told me I almost choked to death on my own vomit on the side of the road. I've never thought of myself as an alcoholic because I never drank regularly, I just couldn't stop drinking once I hit a certain point. On the night in question I hadn't had anything to drink for about a month and felt like I should treat myself at a bar, my friend left early and I disappeared into the night with a bottle of tequila and some paramedics found me passed out on the side of the road.
This scared me straight. I spent the next day looking for my phone and went to the spot where they found me. I just couldn't stop imagining my dead body on the side of that ad. I didn't have any trick or any increase in willpower, I just viscerally felt like drinking would kill me. Resisting alcohol wasn't giving up a pleasure, it was fighting this outside force that was trying to kill me.
And that feeling is fading. I'm starting to want a glass of wine again. I'm still pretty good, I'm living in a situation where alcohol is always present (though only for another week) and I haven't had any. But I've gone from like flinching and recoiling from alcohol to almost having some and talking to talk myself out of it. I think it's probably time to seek more structured support.

I am having the classic sims 2-on-modern-PC-nightmare, and I feel lost at this point since I had no problems on this very computer with this specific install just a couple of months ago (the last time I played). I don't know if there has been a software update to my computer that has made my Sims 2 game unplayable because I haven't touched the game since then. Sims 3 runs perfectly on the highest settings and millions of mods, by the way.
The problems are: pink flashing after a couple of minutes of playing (never in CAS though), heavy lag in neighborhood view (run perfectly smooth in lot mode). Either crashes ("action will now terminate") on the load screen after finishing making a family, or when loading lots. If I manage to open a lot, it crashes after 3-5 minutes of playing even though it runs super smoothly. Never crashes in CAS.
I have done these steps:

• Graphics Rules Maker - tried forcing 4568mb (which is suggested by the program), also tried 1009mb to match my VRAM. It is applied, it is in the laptop log file. I have always used Graphics Rules Maker with the 4568mb setting, and have worked fine before
• Always run the game in administration mode as well as compatibility mode for Windows Vista (is XP better?)
• Have added the d3d9.dll file as well as a text file named dxvk.conf containing "d3d9.maxAvailableMemory=4568" into my TSBin folder
• I have in the past done the memory allocation fix
• Changed my virtual memory amount to be set to 25,000-30,000 in the computer performance settings
• Checked my mods in the Delphy Download Organizer, even though my game ran okay with the same mods a couple of months ago. Doesn't help to remove mods (also I WANT to play with mods, so to be without them is not a long-term option either)
• I delete cache all the time
• I remember doing something related to DirectX too that was recommended, but I am not sure
• I take good care of my computer, always up to date (drivers, everything), always clean temp files/registry, virus searches, frequent complete restarts, a lot of disc space, always close unused programs. It runs really well

My computer is an Asus Vivobook laptop, Windows 10, 8 GB ram, total memory 4568mb, VRAM 1009mb, AMD Radeon Vega 8 Mobile Graphics. 3 years old. Not a super powerful computer I know, but it runs games pretty well actually.
Anyway... I am so tired. What can I do? I am so frustrated since I literally played for hours and hours just this fall. I don't understand! Please help!
Will probably post this in several subreddits because I'm desperate.

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Okay for some background; my boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, he’s 19 and I’m 18. He lives in Europe and I live in the US. We have met before and it was amazing. My family adores him. Okay so, this is where the over thinking comes in. He started college Fall 2022, and I start Fall 2023. He decided to stay at home and go to a college close to his house. He lives in a small town, and doesn’t work. So his schedule is very flexible. Even with the time difference, we talk almost every day and spend as much quality time as one can online. I applied for multiple different colleges in the US and got accepted to some and waiting to hear back from others. I’m scared that when I start college our relationship will change. Since he’s at home still, and I’ll be moving away from home and working and doing college, I feel like my life will be so busy and our relationship will fall behind. So many people have said “don’t go into college with your high school boyfriend.” But I don’t believe in that. I love him so so much and don’t ever think about breaking up just because. But what if we only can talk once a week? Change is scary…for the past 2 years I’ve gotten used to our little schedule and how flexible it is, I’m genuinely so scared the distance will actually affect us. I even thought about going to college where he lives but my family didn’t approve of me going so far away…I may sound dramatic but I’ve been so down about it today. I guess I just want to know your opinion on this situation and if I’m being dramatic. Also anyone who’s been in a similar situation?

Throwaway for obvious reasons.
My husband (33m) divorced me (31f) recently. We dated for about 8 years, married for 3.5.
Rewind to our early 20s. We dated for about a year. When we first started dating, future husband (FH) is reeling after learning that the first girl he ever loved and the girl he lost his virginity to was sleeping with one of his best friends (BF) while they were together. This is a friend he had essentially grown up with, they've known each other since like 2nd grade. They were neighbors. I help him through that a bit.
He broke up with me after about a year. I was devastated. I did something dumb by seducing his roommate, we both got drunk, roommate came back to my apartment, and I texted FH that his roommate wanted to come home with me. FH shows up, comes inside, mild chaos ensues, no violence. Technically roommate and I did not have sex.
After 2 years or so, FH reaches out. We've both dated other people, talk about it a bit. I do not mention that I briefly dated BF (the one he has past trauma with) and that we had sex. Again, why bring it up? Why hurt his feelings over something that was pretty much meaningless?
During first couple years of us dating again, FH hears from his friends that I was hanging out with them for a brief period. He gets suspicious about some particular events. He specifically asks if anything happened with a couple of his friends, but does not bring up BF. AGAIN- WHY would I bring it up?? Why would I hurt him??
We continue dating and eventually get married. Occasionally, he grows suspicious and asks for details about what happened with roommate and other friends. I don't want to lose my relationship and I don't want to hurt him over some BS that happened years ago. I never outright lied, but I wasn't forthcoming.
Eventually, things come to a head. After many years husband is paranoid. He says he is going to "do the embarrassing thing" and talk to his friends directly about things. He did give me a last chance to tell him and I admit, I lied. I couldn't imagine losing him or hurting him when honestly I never thought I was going to see him again when it happened!
He finds out about BF and I was very surprised by how hard he took it. He definitely needed some therapy about what happened with first girlfriend. He immediately freaked out, crying, started divorce proceedings. He let me have the dog and some money so I wouldn't get a lawyer. He's called me every name you can think of, says I tricked him into getting married, that I ruined his life.
I know it sounds kind of bad, but he doesn't even want to try marriage counseling? He says he thinks I would lie to the counselor. I never cheated on him! I feel like I am being thrown away for something we can work through- he has this past trauma that he never dealt with and just refuses to work through it at all. I never thought I would see him again! And I didn't want to hurt him for no reason! AITA?

I ( F 21) have feelings for someone in my friend group ( M 23 )let’s call him Tim.
I just need to get it off my chest.
Background: I met one of my now closest friends ( F 23) about three months ago. Let’s call her Emma. We’ve become very close very quickly. To the point where everyone around us assumes that we’ve been friends since diapers. Because of this I really cherish our friendship and I don’t want to compromise it in anyway.
Emma introduced me to her friends, and I’ve introduced her to my friends which resulted in a fun little group. We’ve taken weekend trips together we always go out on the weekends together and everyone gets along. it’s a really fun dynamic. Which is exactly why I don’t want to go screwing anything up by having feelings for someone in the group.
Emma is also extremely close with Tim. We are in fact her two best friends. And in passing conversation ( about two other people in the group) both of them have made it very clear that having feelings with or hooking up with someone in the group would ruin everything.
When I first met tim, I was immediately panicked, he’s my type and he was so shy at first of course it peaked my interest. I knew I had a crush on him the first time we met. But I assumed it would fizzle out or something as most of my crushes do. But after getting to know him more, my feelings have only grown.
Every time we go out and we are drinking he gets really touchy and because I am drinking as well I play into it, there’s been two nights where we’ve had to share a bed and we ended up cuddling a little but that’s as far as things have gone. He’s somewhat protective when we go out, always making sure I’m OK and if some guy is being creepy or getting too close, he’s very quick to hold me and pretend he’s my boyfriend. Every time he does this he gives me butterflies, and the first few times he did it I just assumed he was being a good friend. He has sisters so I assumed he was just a big bro type. But then I noticed that after whatever creepy guy was gone, he would still be holding me. There are dozens of pictures of us drunk on a night out, holding onto each other smiling. most of my friends tease me that we look like we’ve been in love for years.
Me and my friends often go to country bars, and he complained that he didn’t know how to dance, so I taught him how to 2 step. He’s not bad if the song is slow enough,, whenever a slow song comes on, we always dance together and it makes me wanna melt every time.
I know he’s very adamant about not crossing lines in the friend group. But I can’t help but feel like he might have the smallest crush on me too. Whenever one of us is driving, there’s always that prolonged eye contact in the rearview mirror and I’m probably reading way too far into it but the way he watches me sometimes gives the vibe that he’s in the same situation I find myself in. The last time we shared a bed together, we were on a weekend trip. Everyone was going to bed, and we were both pretty tipsy. he needed help taking off his boots, so I helped him. But after he asked me to stay w him and cuddle and of course…I did.
this caused a riff between me and emma. she was worried we were crossing boundaries and possibly ruining the friend group. I wasn’t mad at her. We are her closest friends and she just wants to make sure that no one gets hurt. I told her nothing physical was ever gonna happen between him n i cuz of the friend group. And it’s true I really don’t want anything physical to happen between us, that would be super messy.
But at the same time we get along great , i’m always laughing and smiling whenever I’m with him. there’s this sense of familiarity, that is so comforting to me, that I’ve never experience with someone before. I can sit here and go on about his smile or his laugh and how they give me heart palpitations. Or about how whenever I’m around him, I have to constantly remind myself to stop staring at his eyes because they are so captivating. I keep finding myself thinking about him at almost all parts of the day. Wondering what he is doing, wanting to send him something that reminds me of him but I never do. I know he’s very adamant about not crossing lines in the friend group so I plan on telling no one my feelings. I plan on not acting on them. I would never want to cross a boundary that both he and emma made very clear.
I re-downloaded dating apps just to distract myself from him, because he’s simply not an option. but every profile I see, simply does not compare to him. I went on one date, and I was constantly looking for qualities that he has in my date. He’s often the subject of my dreams, and both the last thing I think of before bed, and the first thing I think of in the morning. I don’t know how to get him out of my head. I don’t want to stop spending time with him or the friend group but I might have to, for my sake.
He’s supposed to go out of town for a few weeks and I’m hoping time apart will be a good thing. I feel so stupid for even finding myself in this position honestly and I’m hoping as time goes on feelings will fade and I’ll look at this post and laugh someday or question who it was about. but for the time being, I really needed to get this off my chest.

Hey hey! Currently I live in CA and work as a tech with a grocery store chain. Previously I was at 3 letter as a lead tech. I’ve been licensed for 3 years now and I’m moving to Nevada soon. Vegas area. I do plan on doing PTCB either before or right after I move but I’m looking for a change. I’m so so tired of retail. I really enjoy the back end of things when I’m thinking about retail. I really enjoy the clerical side of things, inventory, insurance. Basically the things aside from filling and ringing people out all day. I do have a huge interest in the medical field but school is a little far away for me right now. I know hospital obviously pays the most but I really don’t think I want to do any sterile compounding. Does anyone know of any other types of positions that pay well that I should look into? Experiences? Could I do hospital without the sterile compounding portion? Slightly lower key than 400+ scripts a day with minimal staff and extreme foot traffic is preferred. 😂Any further advice? I’d really appreciate it!

I’m going to change a bit of information in this post for privacy, as I don’t want them finding this post. The story will basically be the same.
I have a friend who I was talking to (romantically), but have decided due to a few reasons that I don’t longer wish to pursue. Recently, they’ve been super into this celebrity. Nothing crazy, I just think they’ve become their new celebrity crush. They’ve changed their usernames to “Celebrity’s Partne or Children’s parent” or references to that celebrity. They’ve even joked about dressing like or being that celebrity’s crush a few times. I don’t say much because I’m the same way with mine (Albeit, not the usernames or being or becoming their crush).
I’m a casual fan of that celebrity, but I am not into them as they are. So whenever I see videos about that celebrity, I sent it to them. Today, I found a video of that celebrity talking about their celebrity crush, and it happened to be the same as mine. I got hella geeked, sent it to them, and said “Damn, just give up you ain’t winnin’ this one” and they responded with “why would I give up when I got it locked down?” And I said “Yeaahh suuurreeee.” Only for them to respond “Someone that ugly and stupid (Not exactly what they said, maybe a bit more harsh) isn’t taking anything from anyone.”
I joked and said “Did you just call my boyfriend ugly and stupid? Oh or were you talking about yourself?” They responded “I wasn’t talking about me”. I admit, I honestly got a bit upset that they commented so negatively about my celebrity crush, since I never comment anything negative about them or their celebrity crush, anything negative about anything they like at all. They always tend to comment negatively or make snarky remarks when it comes to my celebrity “crushes”, or fictional “crushes”, (and other things), whatever that be and I guess I got so fed up of it, that I said “You should be? Are you talking about celebrity?? That doesn’t make sense though. ”
Honestly, after that, they never responded and have lightly responded. I also really hate when people comment about people’s looks in general. To me, at the time it felt like a taste of their own medicine, but I thought maybe I went overboard (I didn’t even realize I said it as harshly as I did). I feel kind of bad that I acted like that and I feel like I’m overreacting about everything, but honestly I’m so fed up of the negative comments (and the other stuff), that I might have just popped off. I don’t really have anyone else I can ask about this, so am I the asshole for what I said?

TLDR: Cute girl at work I’ve been talking to is very adamant about having a kid. I want nothing to do with children but want a relationship anyways.
I (20 M) have been talking to this girl (20 F) for about 2 weeks, although I’ve known her for about 2 years. Things have been going fast, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing except that I work with her and my ex. At first I didn’t want to hop into another relationship since I’ve only been single for about 4 months but she’s hot and I’m depressed and lonely. Not to mention we work with my ex and I don’t feel like dealing with any drama that might come up.
I’m currently on vacation and we’ve been texting 24/7. I can’t wait until I get back so I can get lucky, bc the way we’ve been talking it seems like I got this in the bag. The day I get back we were talking about drinking and watching movies until bad decisions ensue.
The problem started last night, she got drunk and we were talking and she mentions she wants kids. This wasn’t new to me, she mentioned it before and I said I didn’t want any or maybe I’ll change my mind as I get older. Well a day passes by, she goes out again (not an alcoholic, just college students) and she’s on the topic again. This time it’s a bit more concerning, but I’m just thinking “it’s baby fever, she’s just not thinking reasonably, she just likes the idea of children”. As the conversation goes on she gets more and more aggressive with it. Saying stuff like “all that pain is worth it” “I want to do it naturally” etc. after I’m trying to get her to reasonably think about it like financial stability and responsibility of a child, having vacations before having to deal with children, etc.
Finally, after about 3 hours on this subject I responded with “I’m sorry, can we stop talking about this”. After this I pretty much just said gn bc it’s 1 am. I know I could’ve timed it better bc she probably thinks she scared me away but I’m tired and a little irritated bc she can’t take a hint.
I may be overthinking all of this bc she was drunk but if she’s this persistent while drunk, there’s gotta be a decent amount of truth behind it. Hopefully tomorrow it won’t be awkward but I have a feeling (overthinking) she just wants to get pregnant and if I’m not on board, it’s done for.
The conversation kinda weirded me out bc the way she was talking made it seem like she didn’t care that I didn’t want a kid and she was very persistent. I’m just worried that if/when we have sex, she’s gonna want me to finish inside and I’m not sure I’ll have the strength to tell her no. My ex and I didn’t have sex for the last 7 months of our relationship (part of the reason we broke up) so I’m kinda desperate at his point.
Honestly I’m just thinking of what would come after that like a weird environment at work, ruined potential relationship, my ex finding out (we still have a good relationship and I still care for her so I do care how she feels about me).
I also want to mention there have been plenty of green flags with this girl, it’s just this recent development has me worried.
I’m not asking whether I should pursue her or not bc my dick is doing all the thinking. I’m asking how I should go about making it clear I’m not gonna give her a kid while also building a healthy relationship with her or at least a friends with benefits kinda thing. I guess I’ll update when I go over to her place later this week.

I’m a cis woman pushing 50. I was in a several year relationship with someone who presented themself as a bisexual cis man during our relationship. She came out as a transgender woman and I’m trying to understand it all.
For background, I have always been a supporter of the LGBTQIA+ community, even back in the late 80’s when homophobia ran rampant. I supported trans right when there was extreme hate against the community. I remember one “documentary” from the 90’s on a popular cable channel that treated a trans woman like a freak show. It was shocking.
So, I ask these questions with an open heart, respect, a genuine curiosity, and desire to learn. I hope the questions are taken in the spirit in which I mean them. If I am inadvertently offensive, please point it out so I can learn.
We’ve had no contact for years so I can’t ask her directly,
My questions are:
I’ll call my former partner “S”. When S and I dated, we were so close. I consider it to be a significant and important relationship. At the time, S seemed so comfortable presenting as a man, and I mean a “man’s man”. Very masculine. As far as I knew, she was really happy and I didn’t detect any inner turmoil. I suspect that she was just really good at hiding. But, is it possible for someone to be happy with their gender and identify as their assigned gender for a period of their life and identify differently later? The person I was in my teens, or 20’s, or even 10 years ago feels like a totally different person from who I am today. Could it work like that if you’re trans? Could S have identified comfortably as a man then, but it changed? Maybe this is a question for any older members of the community. It doesn’t matter in terms of our relationship. I suppose this is just curiosity.
I’m also wondering how she would have viewed my cis female body. Nobody can speak for her, but I am curious to hear from any MtF women. We had a very robust sex life that included pretty vanilla acts of any straight couple. It was literally far and away the best sex I have ever had though. Seriously amazing. For any MtF women who were in typically cis heteronormative relationships when you presented as a man, how did you view your cis female partner’s body?
Again, my questions come from a place of genuinely wanting to learn and better myself. I hope they come across that way. Just a Gen X’er trying to keep up …

https://temu.com/s/83v0XR1EbwcJxyR2 https://app.temu.com/m/Jy9G4ETMQGMYx Cannot promise click for click because I have clicked multiple people already. But I will certainly try.

I’ve always slept on the outside because i need to wake up and go to work early. Around midnight, he comes to bed and I wake up to use the washroom. When I come back, I asked if he could move over a little bit and he said “no, you have enough space.”
I don’t agree with that. Although I HAVE enough space, I don’t like sleeping with my back at the literal edge of the bed. He says because I’m (5’3, 120 lbs) smaller than him (5’8, 160 lbs), the space he has is proportional to mine.
It’s just so frustrating to deal with this every night, I just need to know am I delusional or is he. pic of our bed with him in it. In this picture, he wants to mention that the crack of the bed filled with clothes don’t count, just the extra space between his pillow and the edge of the bed.

I have been involved with someone avoidant for 5 months. Now it's been a week since they haven't replied to my text. I tried reaching out once thereafter and still no response. I can see them active on social media though. I do not want to contact again for the closure because I feel disrespected. I have anxious attachment and sometimes I feel like I maybe just overreacting. Can you guys confirm if this is ghosting?
We were going good, or that's what I thought. We didn't have any conflict before this for them to withdraw and I can't really think of anything that may have cause them to shut down. How do I react in such situation? Do you think no response for a week is deal breaker? Is it a long time or it isn't? I am sooo confused.

I have been a lurker in breeding communities for at least a year. Just on the surface, this is who I am: Student with a breeding kink, Healthy. mostly Italian descent, 5’4”, Brown hair, big brown eyes, Wavy hair, full lips, DDF, and straight edge. It has always been a dream of mine to be pregnant, but not necessarily a mother. I am extremely caring and know I would make a great caretaker and homemaker one day, but I know I have to find my husband first. I also want a master’s degree. I want to gift life to a family or individual who really yearns for a baby. I would be happy to ship breast milk. Furthermore, I am very passionate about fertility equity. This is a little bit of a “crapshoot” because it’s rare for someone with no children of their own to be a surrogate. I am not permitted to be a surrogate through an agency because I have had no successful (or any) pregnancies before. My OB-GYN says I am healthy and fertile, but my exact numbers are unknown (because they usually only do testing on people struggling with infertility…..and not covered by insurance). Please do not judge. This is something I want so bad, and who knows at what age will I find “the one”?

I’ve been trying to study my German for my B1 certification, but I’ve been bogged buy a slew of family issues back in the states.
In addition, although I’ve been saving up money to prepare to pay rent for a few months, after traveling to Germany this July for two productions with a young artist group, I can’t seem to get straight the order of things I need to do. Do I need to find a place to stay and then apply for permits and then apply for work? Do I find a place and then apply for jobs and then apply for permits? I asked some of my colleagues living in Weimar and Frankfurt about the process, but nobody’s talking. And just a few minutes ago I just read another post on the sub Reddit about how the OP’ Ausländerbehörde essentially jerked them around to the point where they were dirt broke in terms of getting permits to work and live in Germany…
Is something going on I’m not tracking? Am I just not getting the right information? I could certainly use some personal guidance

I am in a rut right know, stuck in a job that I have been in for the last 7 years, started right out of high school and have no other work experience besides my time at this one company. It is becoming mentally exhausting which has taken a bit of a toll on my mental health.
I have always been into everything involved with computers and the like and really see myself getting into the field. Just looking for some advice from people in the field also if a TAFE certificate is the best way to start.
I have a pretty good technical aptitude when it comes to IT from some self learning, so want to know if there is much difference between the two.

We had an icebreaker at work recently, and the prompt was inspired by the Last of Us, basically asking what our survival skill during the zombie (I know they're not called zombies on the show) apocalypse would be. Drove me nuts. They literally behaving the way people do in zombie movies: thinking they're invincible, being in denial, spreading the disease, taking unnecessary risks, etc. THERE IS A REAL PANDEMIC, not just a TV one right now!! The lack of self-awareness is mind-boggling.

Looking to sell/trade my Moonbreon. To be fully transparent, the card is OC (as per the album images) and I also want to note that there is a nick on the top-right corner on the front of the card. I don't see it being extended to the back of the card. I have included videos in the album below. I can provide more if needed.
Timestamp + closeups/video: https://imgur.com/a/KKDozFt
I am asking 370 PP (or 380 Trade value) for the Moonbreon. Paypal is priority, but I'm also looking for a Blaziken Vmax AA in a PSA10 or trade towards a Shining Gyarados slab. Also interested in other AA slabs, or CZ GG slabs. Not interested in any raw singles atm.
Thanks for stopping by!

Hello all. This all feels very complicated, so apologies in advance if I am not very clear. Happy to answer any questions. I'm in England.
My grandmother passed one year ago, and her will stated that her estate be left to her children (father, aunts), and the house contents to her grandchildren (myself and one cousin). Probate has only recently been granted.
Not sure how relevant, but to make sure the information is complete, my grandmother's property is divided into two, and I have lived in the smaller part for 12 years (paying rent, apart from the two years of covid and the year since my grandmother passed). I had been caring for my grandmother from around 2015 through to her passing.
My family have been taking items from the house since she passed, throwing items away, or telling my cousin and I 'you can't have that, it's mine'. I have not said much about this, having expressed disappointment but that I don't want to fall out over possessions.
I'm asking for advice now, as my family have started clearance of my grandmother's property while my cousin and I are abroad and unable to be there. This is because they want to put both properties on sale as fast as possible. Of course this means I am on countdown to having to leave my home, and I don't want my sadness/resentment about this to inform my feeling that their actions are wrong.
I guess I am asking what, if any, rights my cousin and I have. Should the property be being cleared of contents while we are not there, and do they have a right to pressure us to do it quickly in order to sell the houses? I wanted to investigate some worthy charities for some of the items, and some antiques shops to sell others that the family don't want. The family did not want my cousin and I starting this process without them, but are now starting it without us. If helpful, they are all executors of the will.

I'm going to be moving within the next month. I plan to setup a new c&c cage before I move in so I can just transfer my babies right in. I'm hoping I have enough panels and bedding. I bought a waterproof tarp for the bottom layer. I also hope they like it and my dominants do okay being closer to everyone else. Right now I have 3 dominants, 1 in each pair of 2 and 1 solo because she is so bossy. I also am working on introducing my new baby into the mix but it's been hard so I'm hoping this will help. Also, injury isolation will be so much easier. I just hope I do it right for my babies.

How long did it take and do I have hope. Currently dealing with this and is a primary reason in considering ending it. She's was a virgin when we met and I'm not. Been told I'm kind of big in stature (~6'0 ~275) and down there (~7.75 length by ~5.75 girth). She's small/petite (~ 5'1 weight idk but I'll say < 120). First time we tried nothing happened. Eventually we were able to do the deed. But I literally can only get about at most half way in before it stops. Plus only very slow, small, shallow strokes. She's aroused/wet (maybe the wettest I've seen), we use lube, lots of foreplay and all that. Idk if her and I are just incompatible from our equipment or she needs more time to losen up and get more comfortable.
She's interested and wants to give me pleasure just as I with her. After I initiated initially and she said she wasn't ready we did things as she slowly got more comfortable. I'd say she's even more eager to have sex and do things. That combined with her inexperience and me not easily cumming from head and our sex life is lacking for me. While for her she's like this is the best thing ever. When I am able to eventually get inside her, she's so tight, and I'm so nervous about hurting her that I either go soft or finish quickly and I don't enjoy myself. I'm nervous about hurting her because each time we have sex she bleeds. She then tells me not to worry it's not a big deal. But how can I not worry when I know she's going through that and that I'm the cause.