Clever medical pumpkin carving

At what point am I being selfish or am I wrong (euthanization)

2023.03.22 06:13 StrixFire At what point am I being selfish or am I wrong (euthanization)

Pumpkin has been with me for the last 9 years and she was with my ex wife 2 years before that. Pumpkin is about 13 years old and just went though a really bad fungal infection and she was treated for it. After that treatment was completed she started acting a little off so I took her to the vet where they said she has pancreatitis, fatty liver syndrome, jaundice and blood in her urine. They said they didn't know what might have caused the issues but I think with the anti fungal medication affected her liver (but I'm not a vet). I had her boarded and treated for 3 days, and once they released her back to me they said her levels were all stabilize and sent me home with low fat food and a bag of meds. For the first 2 days home everything was okay, she wasn't eating a lot but she was eating and drinking. Today she stopped eating again and hasn't eaten in 24 hours. I've been sitting with her while she eats but she refused to touch anything. I've tried to disassociate the food with the medication by giving her meds and then waiting 2-3 hours to feed her and let the appetite stimulate do its magic. I know with more than a day without eating the fatty liver syndrome is just going to flare up even worse. She's been super lethargic, won't move herself and has been hiding like she's just giving up.
I've spent about 800 for the fungal infection and 2100 for the initial treatment and having her boarded. I'm at a point to where I cant afford anymore and I'm struggling to make ends meet myself. I've drained all my saving to try to keep my baby alive. I have an appointment on Thursday to discuss this with the vet but I'm trying to get in this morning when I get off work at 7am to see my options.
I don't want to seem like I'm just giving up because I truly do love her but it seems like she's giving up the fight also. I've spent pretty much everything I have to try to keep her with me but I'm at my ends to afford it. At what point do I let go because I don't want to let her suffer or am I wrong for even thinking this is an option?
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2023.03.22 04:43 Hornet_Scout Those were the days

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2023.03.22 04:35 InFerroVeritas Creative Accounting

Talea reclined on the day bed in her office, one leg folded under her and the other swinging free along its side. The rich red upholstery squeaked with each swing; she paid it no mind. Her attention was directed to the letters on her desk, read a half dozen times, and her gaze was fixed on the ceiling. Tessellated patterns of hexagons and trigons repeating with geometric precision, inlays of gold-flecked lapis lazuli and pale blue agate bringing color to the relief carvings.
"I think we should send him a gift," Yna said.
Talea turned her attention towards her companion. The arch of her eyebrow made her question plain.
Yna sipped at her tea and then recoiled as if slapped. "Aquan's blood, girl, how do you drink this?"
"Practice," Talea said with the barest hint of a smile. "That and a general mistrust of the water in this city. The Blackwater is no Sweetwater, yes?"
Yna resisted the urge to fling the contents of the cup over her shoulder and out the window, but only just. Instead, she set the porcelain down on its saucer and gave it the sort of dirty look a banker reserves for smudged ink in a ledger. "As you say. And as I was saying, I think we should send Hightower a gift."
Talea chortled. "How many iron coins do you think a raven can carry, my dearest friend on this wretched continent?"
"I was thinking about something with a bit more... refinement," Yna said. "Mayhaps a ring?"
Talea turned her gaze back to the ceiling and considered the proposal. "Fine enough. But I think I ought to talk to Aelinor, too."
"You haven't mentioned her in a spell," Yna said. She crossed the room to a credenza and plucked two glasses of carved crystal from a mahogany stand. "Things did not end well last time."
Talea sighed and closed her eyes. It was that or grimace. "No, they did not."
Yna knelt and searched through the cabinets under the credenza, examining bottles and decanters until she found a rich red that fit the occasion. "You haven't told me much about it."
This time she did grimace. "Mistakes were made."
Yna rose, holding a bottle of Rasnic. "Look what I found."
Talea turned her attention back to Yna. Her eyebrows rose when she saw the label, a wheel with three spokes. "I thought we drank the last of that."
"They brought some back from Liy." She produced a knife from somewhere and began peeling back the wax seal. "Let's celebrate."
"What are we going to celebrate?" Talea waved vaguely in Yna's direction. "The fact that you didn't lop a finger off with your knife because you're too stubborn to use a corkscrew?"
Yna barked a sharp laugh. "The only corkscrew I use --"
"-- yes, yes, I've heard that one before."
Yna waggled her eyebrows.
Talea groaned.
"So -- ring for Hightower, what's this about Aelinor?"
"Well, her new tax plan --" Talea was abruptly cut off as a piece of wax flew past her ear. "You missed."
"I took pity on you." Yna flicked another bit of wax with her knife; this piece failed to clear the distance between them.
Talea snorted. "Superb bladework, ser."
Yna sniffed and looked down her nose at Talea. "'twas intentional, my lady."
"I feel like there's a dirty joke to be had here." Talea grinned across the room to Yna. "Shall we workshop it, my dear?"
"I struggle to conceive of a situation in which you need help finding a dirty joke, Tal." Yna finally wedged the cork out of the bottle with a satisfying pop and began filling the crystal. "Something about over-promising, I suspect."
Talea placed a hand over her heart in mock indignation. "Why, I never! The implication!"
Yna poured the remainder of the bottle into a decanter and carried the crystal across the room, offering a glass to Talea. "Spare me. Now, do you want to drink and talk about Aelinor or did you want to talk about something else?"
Talea pushed herself up into a seated position and accepted the offered crystal. She met Yna's eye and allowed her gaze to wander, with as much brazen disregard for etiquette as she could muster, down the other woman's figure. She smiled slightly as she went, then pointed at Yna's knee. "It looks like the cleaners haven't swept up lately."
Yna glanced down, holding one leg out to examine the indicated knee. "Oh, that wasn't from here." She met Talea's eyes and took a long sip of her wine. "That was from the other kneeling I did this morning."
Talea threw back her wine, not even bothering to savor the taste of it. She paid no mind to the fact that the Rasnic vineyards ceased to exist a decade ago or that the vintage in question was almost as old as she was. She set her crystal aside and leaned towards Yna. "I think that discussion about Aelinor can wait, don't you?"
Yna laughed. "I'm sure you can multitask, oh great and clever Emissary of the Iron Bank. It's a wonder you're able to fit a hat on that head, what with your enormous intellect and unrivaled mastery of numerology."
"Laugh all you want," Talea said. She snatched Yna's wine away and drank that took. This time she did take a moment to savor it, but not nearly as much as the vintage deserved. "I'll have you know that I am the foremost mathemagician in Westeros."
"Wow!" Yna said. "It's an honor to be in your presence, my lady!"
Talea smiled. "Yes, I'm sure it is." She reached out, hooking three fingers around Yna's necklace. Whatever Yna's response might have been was lost as Talea pulled her in for a kiss.
A few heartbeats (or perhaps ten minutes) later, Yna pulled away. "Feeling focused yet?"
"Oh, very," Talea said, biting her lip. She realized she still had a glass of crystal in her left hand. Fine Myrish crystal, as clear as a fine Spring day. She flung it across the room, indifferent to the sound of something worth thrice its weight in gold shattering against a stone wall. She pulled Yna in for another kiss.
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2023.03.21 23:24 jmcates210 Concerns about blood sugar with pumpkin oil and marshmallow root

Hello! I recently started having IC after stopping hormonal birth control and because of that i only really have flares when estrogen is low. That being said I don’t want to be put on medication for a problem that usually only affects me for a week or two during the month.
I’ve began taking pumpkin seed oil (2000mg during the morning and an extra 1000mg in the afternoon if needed) and recently I added marshmallow root tea to my regimen to see how it affects me and if it helps me and it does to an extent, so I’m thinking about switching to capsules. I have never had problems with low blood sugar before and since both affect blood sugar, I was wondering if i should be worried that they will mess it up. For now I’m sticking to tea to make sure I don’t have negative effects in the long run. So far the only weird thing I’ve noticed is that I feel a little bit cloudy in my head, but of course that could be due to other things such as the weather or where I’m at in my cycle. I’m still very new to all of this so any information will help, especially with supplements or teas that’ll help urgency
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2023.03.21 21:53 m80mike Don't Feed The Pumpkins

A rule breaking truck driver takes a forbidden detour.

Don't Feed the Pumpkins
I'm typing this as a record of what has happened to me. If someone should find me out here, where ever here is, this is what happened and who is responsible. Also, out of the dozens of vehicles bogged down in this field, mine is the Blue Jay 2013 Freight Liner. If I should die and it is recoverable, it should go to my son, John Grainger in Antioch, Illinois.
I left Litchfield Illinois around 2pm on Halloween with a last-minute load of pumpkins destined for the Antioch Walmart. Despite the fact I was once that told Illinois is the #1 pumpkin producer in the country the itself state appears to be in the midst of a shortage. I was due in about 8pm, but I was trying get in by 6pm and after unloading, I was going to visit my wife Carly and my son for Halloween. It was going to be the first Halloween in my son's life that I was going to be there for trick o treating. My wife was making a big deal out of it and John was 10 now, so, she said he would be “scarred with disappointment” if I didn't show now. So, I probably should have gotten better sleep the night before and sue me, I was gear jamming and popping go-pills like popcorn. Don't look down on me, don't be fooled, this is just the nature of the trucking industry. Everyone does it and I'm not afraid to tell it like it is.
Just after Normal on 39 I hit a wall of traffic. I could hear on the CB that there is a hazmat incident up ahead and they require special teams to clear it off. I, like the other truckers, get to gabbing on the radio, looking for shortcuts. To my surprise, after scrutinizing this route several times before, I was informed about a “gutshot” shortcut just ahead that could get in me into my destination at least an hour earlier, even with the fact I had sat in the backup for at least 45 minutes at this point. A second comrade in gears piped in and stated that the shortcut was closed. The first driver contradicted him and stated, he had used it two weeks ago, it was wide open country land you could go 70 the whole way, and the only town along the way had burned down in an industrial accident 30 years ago. The second trucker chimed in again. He said it was closed for tonight and only tonight and not to use it. I disregarded the second trucker, exited the interstate and followed the directions of the first trucker.
Well, Carly, you always said it would be this way. You always said, I needed to learn how to follow directions to not cut so many damn corners all the time. You always told me didn't put in the work, and the funny thing is, for the first time, on this drive, get there, I did. Sure, I cut all the corners, but I wanted to to put in the work. But you're right, I never put a second of effort in, and if this is how it ends, I suppose you're right, I never will. But I guess, one way or another, you're getting what you've wanted, what you text me, what you don't tell me about, and what I didn't care about. I was coming home for him and damn it, I know it won't hold up in court but I want my boy to get the damn truck!
Anyway, I found the road, 2 lanes clear to the sky, surrounded by corn and then pumpkin fields forever. My straight shot, I pushed 80 the whole way flying on cracked asphalt, diesel, and go-pills. Ahead, there were barricades and I applied the brakes and barely stopped in time. I got out and saw they were chained up with a padlock to concrete posts in the ground. In theory, I could blast through them but I would sustain serious damage. The ground was a bit wet so I didn't think I could cross the ditch and field and not get stuck either. The barricades were not official in the least. They had a sign on them made out of it mailbox stick-on letters which said: “Do Not Feed The Pumpkins”. As far as I could see from my cab and binoculars, there was absolutely nothing wrong with the damn road. I said hell and I knew it would take hours to reverse course and get back in time – in time to even unload much less make it in time to go trick o treating.
And I said it wasn't worth it. I didn't bother to call. I'd just show up now. Because it wasn't my fault. So I started back, turning around with great difficulty. I traveled back 2 miles and saw small signs for a rest area. I must have missed it the first time, too deep into the zone I suppose now. I needed to pee and probably eat a bit before starting a roundabout way back, so I stopped. It was a little old 2 story joint with a small dinner on the 1st level and looked like 4 or 5 small motel rooms on top and oddly an outhouse for a restroom. I want to emphasize the outhouse because that is how you'll find and catch this guy, the guy who did this to me. It was Bill Shaw of Shaw's Shack, who did this to me. It had a sign with the building, it too was made of stick-on letters and vaguely resembled a huge ransom note. It read “Yes! We are open! We are the only rest area for 67 miles and 1 of 2 “tombstones” for the late great town of Pumpkin Grove Illinois – the former pumpkin capital of Illinois. Ask Your host, Bill Shaw about the Pumpkin-beef-bean stew!
The parking lot had three vehicles in it, not including my own, a silver Prius, a grand cheeroke with wood panels, and an older model chevy pick up truck. I went inside. The dinner was small, set in a rustic décor with old license plates nailed to the walls. The cafe had eight counter seats and two smaller tables near the two windows. There were two witnesses to what happened that night, to what Bill Shaw did – at least partial witnesses. There was the older man with stringy white hair and octagonal glasses – unfortunately, I didn't get his name. There was that irritating millennial – All I remember is the metal crap in her ears and lip. Hell, if I die and John starts ever pulling that crap, I'll come back and haunt the crap out of both of you. Anyway, now, I wish I could remember their names or something else about them to put here. I didn't care about either one of them enough to remember.
I guess that goes for Shaw too. He was a bit taller as sometimes I couldn't see his face while sitting at the counter because of the low lights in the ceiling blocking his face. He had gray hair. Hell. That's it. Anyway, the old man said he was part of a historical society, said he spent the better part of his past two years tracking down anyone or anything about Pumpkin Grove. The college student – of course – it was college student said she was from the school newspaper, looking for a spooky story. When she asked me where I was from, I didn't respond.
Shaw came from the kitchen with two big bowls of the famous Pumpkin-beef-bean stew for first two. He seemed taken back by my presence for a bit before saying “howdy” and trying to get real friendly with me. He asked what media I was from. I told him I wasn't from no media and I was trying to get through the barricade up ahead. Neither of the other two seemed to know about the barricade. Shaw said he didn't know anything about it either. I was suspicious of him then because of the lettering on the signs. But I didn't push it. I wanted to eat and he said my choice was the stew or stew. So the stew seemed fine. He said he wished he had more time to chat with me but he promised to tell the story of Pumpkin Grove to the two others but I was welcome to listen and ask questions. I didn't say it but I couldn't care less, I was going no where fast and I needed to eat.
He started off by saying he and his wife are among a handful of survivors of the fire that consumed the town of Pumpkin Grove some 30 years ago on Halloween night. Then his story descended into a cross between a rambling fading nightmare and a ghost story. He said, without hesitation, fear of consequence or remorse that he was accessory to a murder in his childhood. Specifically, some 40 years ago, again on Halloween, he was friends with a small group of young men including one named Donnie, who was a little slow and had a slightly misshaped head. He was picked on a lot by the Gerst Brothers, notorious town bullies and teenage thugs of a bad seed thanks to their neglectful alcoholic single father. Long story short, he said, the Gerst Brothers lured Donnie, himself and another 2 boys out to a pumpkin field where they gave back Donnie's missing dog. Apparently they kidnapped the dog and wrapped every inch of it in duct tape a few days ago. They watched us try to peel and pull the duct tape off while the weakened, hungry, and thirsty dog whimpered away its last in the field. Unbeknownst to any of us, Donnie had a pocket knife and he lost it as the Gerst Brothers cackled around him and the dead dog. He leaped up as they laughed and sliced the vein on their necks. One of the Brothers died quickly while Donnie and the two others fought the other to death. Shaw said he just stood there, covered in arterial blood splatters, watching Donnie and the others finish off the Gersts.
Much of the town was shockingly grateful to hear the Gerst Brothers were dead and everyone was all too happy to sweep it under the rug rather than have 4 of their sons incarcerated for decades when they were needed to help with the town's bread and butter – the Pumpkins. So, they buried the Gerst Brothers in that field and grew pumpkins on their corpses and no one really talked about it. The town paid off their father, who was too inebriated most of the time to care and he gleefully drank himself to death on the payoff only about a year later.
I didn't have much of a reaction to the story. The historian on the other hand, was hesitant to stay and keep writing and he made a brief protest concerning whether or not the story was true and whether or not he could legally listen to it. Shaw said it was both true and legal. After all, there was nothing left of the town and the remains were long gone and he himself, would not bare witness to himself. The college student's dumb metal encrusted mouth was agape in a mix of horror and disbelief.
I was waiting, patiently, might I add, for my stew. Shaw promised it would be up soon. He continued the story, stating that the fields produced abnormally well afterwards and 10 years later he was visiting his parents with his girlfriend for the annual Pumpkin fest. It was just that the pumpkins weren't just more numerous and larger, or more resistant to the rains and the fungus, they were alive and nothing could keep them tame or from spreading wider and wider. And everyone thought this was great at first, the profits were never higher but then weird things began to happen. Equipment went missing and two farm hands were crushed by a wagon full of pumpkins tipping over onto them in what was at first called a freak accident. Shaw recounted how he took his girlfriend through one of the patches and the vines seem to wind and grapple her legs, of course, Shaw's folks passed it off as her not being used to the mud but Shaw said he knew better.
Shaw continued to describe that over the days that led up to Halloween, the Jack O Lanterns on people's porches and elsewhere began to do some unusual things. Things like seemingly move by themselves from dusk to dawn, changing the carvings of their faces slightly, or appearing to “jump” off a table onto the porch without damage or apparent cause. On the morning of Halloween, Shaw said that he found his black cat, Lucky, incinerated in front of a jack o lantern as if it had breathed fire on to it from its mouth though they had long ago blown out the candle inside.
After the cat burning, the elderly man from the historical society tossed his spoon in his bowl. Shaw asked if something was wrong. The elderly man got up to leave and he said it tasted like bitter cold bull and his story was bull and thanked him for nothing. After checking the remaining contents of his bowl of stew, Shaw chased him out of the door, to his car, asking him what direction he planned to go home. When he peeled out of the parking lot he was headed southwest. Shaw came back in and threw up his hands.
I tell nothing but the truth, he said, most people can't handle it. Part of me wanted to go, but I was cozy there, it was warm and the story, while bull to me at the time, was entertaining enough. The SJW sitting down the way looked exhausted, barely keeping her eyes open as Shaw finished out the story. In short he said, Donnie approached him at dusk on Halloween while he and his family sat on the porch eagerly awaiting trick o treaters. Donnie said the Gerst Brothers are alive in the pumpkins and that they planned to burn the whole town down tonight. Donnie said, he had to tell Shaw because Shaw wasn't supposed to die, he was supposed to watch.
I rudely stopped him and demanded more stew. I was still hungry and the stew was somehow unsatisfying. When he returned, he finished the story, stating the town was suddenly engulfed in flames and their house in particular with Donnie on the porch, flash burned to the ground like napalm from an exploding pumpkin. He escaped with his family and his future wife in the pick up truck sitting outside now.
The college student said she felt like she needed to lay down, that she didn't think she could make back to the campus to the north. Shaw attended to getting her one of the rooms upstairs. I stayed down stairs and went to the back for more stew. I rubbed my eyes intensely and felt as if I too should stay for the night. But in the tug of war between fatigue and dexrine, the dexrine was slowly coming out ahead.
Next to the stew was a cutting board and a knife and on it was some bluish whitish powder which I found peculiar. On floor was a bottle of medication. It was Insomnex – a sleeping pill I use when I'm coming off of dexrine. The stew was dosed.
I ran to my truck and pulled out my dexrine and my revolver. As I climbed out of the driver's side, I could see Shaw running out of the dinner with a huge kitchen knife. I ducked under the trailer and back out on his side and pointed the gun at him.
What the hell I asked as I slowly advanced on him with my snub nose pointed at his head. He dropped the knife. He said, I just wanted to puncture your tires, I had to do something to stop you. I know you want to go north and I know you might be crazy enough and your truck tough enough to smash the barricades but I can't let you. I can't let anyone else go through, he said hysterically. I asked the dumb question about whether or not he set the barricades and just as I previously suspected, he did.
I'm supposed to watch, Shaw cried. No one can get through tonight, no can be allowed to. I told him to shut up as he rambled on about how he and his wife took it upon themselves to ward off travelers on Halloween Night. Its a cursed road tonight, he said, we're cursed to stay here and this is the best we can do to stop it from spreading. Its been calling us for 30 years, he went on, we tried to walk away but it kept on spreading, the pumpkins, he said gritting his teeth in anguish.
Maybe it was the dexrine and the insomnex working together, hell maybe it was the stew by itself but I just started to laugh as I guided Shaw back into the dinner and proceeded to duct tape him down to the dinner chair to make sure he could not cause anymore harm to anyone else until the police arrived. I had some cash on me, I wasn't a criminal, I wasn't going to make it seem like I tied him up and dinned and dashed, I was in the right, I was doing the lawful thing. So I left him exact change, no tip for the food. In the process of making change for myself, I found the padlock key in the cash drawer, I was certain of it at the time as I waved it in front of Shaw and he gasped and thrashed behind the duct tape the hardest.
I got into my truck and gunned it north towards the barricades, which, as I suspected was easily opened with the key I confiscated from Shaw. I got on my CB and started making emergency calls to the State Police, I gave them my name, the location of the diner, and Shaw's name. I was in the middle of nowhere so it didn't surprise me when I got static and no acknowledgment. I had no bars on my cell phone either but that is typical of central Illinois.
I was going along about 70. The sun was almost down but I hadn't seen the moon yet. I turned on the radio and found a classic rock station. The song was Born on the Bayou from CCR. The opening riff perked me up and reassured me that I had done everything all well and all good. If things held, there was a chance, I could get my freight unloaded and see John tonight. I was eagerly tapping the steering wheel waiting to bust into “When I was just a little boy...” But just as the lyrics should have entered, the radio station seemed to have accidentally reset the song, it just started over.
The sun faded away entirely and yet no moon came up. The sky was so dark but I didn't remember seeing any clouds or expecting any for that matter. The song continued restarting itself, the same opening again and again. I flipped through the other stations and all of them had it playing. Eventually, the digital clock on my dash began to spin wildly like the LCD numbers on the tuner while in scan mode. The truck buffeted and shook side to side despite my headlights showing no cause for it.
To my shock, ahead, in the distance was single traffic light. It was went from green, to yellow, and red, as any other traffic light but there were no lights or towns on this road. I slowed to 40, then 35 then to 30 as I entered an unnamed densely populated area with small buildings, stores, and houses and one traffic light. I came to a stop at the light and I looked around, locked my doors and tried to glimpse where I was. Where ever I was, I felt, I felt like I shouldn't be there. There were dim orange lights in some of the rooms of the houses at the edge of the intersection.
I looked up at one of the windows and I saw a figure with large head in the window. I couldn't believe my eyes at least not until the figure turned to face outward. It was a jack o lantern, a classic one with a black glow where the eyes, nose, and mouth sat. It was held up right by a thin vine structure that seemed to grow and stretch as it stuck its head out of the window and let out a barely audible shrill whistle and stared directly at me.
I gunned it. I blew the red light as the town seemed to collapse into nothing by dark green swelling pumpkin vine and a sea of glowing jack o lanterns in my side view mirrors. I hit the radio off because all I could hear on it was that whistle filtering through. I drove and the mass of jack o lanterns grew in the mirrors. I glimpsed the left and right windows and the plains were glowing black with more pumpkins rolling and creeping towards the road.
The road began to warp and bend as I started to red line my truck. The buffeting side to side became difficult to control as the engine groaned. I couldn't explain how the road began to shift nor how the moon, blood orange began to circle around me from horizon to horizon. Aside from the moon, I thought I was making progress as I couldn't see the vines nor the hundreds of blacklight pumpkins swirling after me.
The moon slowed and dipped down and I started climbing a hill. As I crested, the moon filled the entire windshield and more. It spun and then settled on a black light pumpkin face and bore down on the cab.
I don't know what happened next but I woke up in my cab. The was engine smoking. All I could see was mud and putrid rotten pumpkins as far as I could see. My Blue Jay was sunk up to the cab down in mud, vines and rot. It wasn't going anywhere in it without some serious assistance. To my right and left I saw dozens of other vehicles, most of them at least ten years old, also up their doors in mud and rot. Swarms of flies were visible all around in the boiling midday sun. I'm not really sure how long it has been or what time it really was because the clock on my phone is broken and simply reads as 99:99. I don't know what day it is. I have no cell signal and no radio.
Carly, I need to be honest with you. I cheated on you. Maybe a dozen times. I did it before I thought, before I knew you were doing it to me. I can't live by the rules of trucking, or marriage or anything. It is the road and you command it and that is the only rule. But now, I'm worried I've broken my last rule. I have no food and no water. There is no road here. There is only rule of a blazing sun with jack o lantern face that never sets. I fear that in time, unless I find help or help finds me, I will be feeding the pumpkins.

Theo Plesha
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2023.03.21 20:51 endersgame69 Adopted By Humans VI C38

We lay together that night. It seemed that this act was the ultimate stress reliever and comfort between bonded pairs, we’d done the same in our time together in Chi’cagoa Rea. Though we had little enough time together thanks to her ship obligations in the immediate time after that, as she’d engaged in a few extremely profitable trade runs from Earth to a Dlamias outlying colony that conveniently enough had no patrol ships around to ask any nosy questions about arrests or charges…
We made up for the lost time when we could.
Lisa always took full advantage of that absence, though as for what she thought of the Captain’s absences, [Redacted]. The homeworld did not get around to properly securing the colony where the liquor flowed from, until after the Earth government asked that she be pardoned as a show of good faith given her ‘exemplary services rendered in the pursuit of harmony between worlds’.
Which was a fancy way of saying she had a fanbase and it would look good if she were in favor again. I wag my tail sometimes, thinking of the apocalyptic fury that must have run through some bureaucrat’s veins when they had to process that request for an outlier turned infamous pirate. Even if she didn’t target the Dlamias fleet, her ability to wreak merry havoc must have presented all kinds of headaches back home. Not to mention stealing the ‘official envoy’s’ place.
That one did eventually arrive and now made occasional trade runs in a triangle shape between Earth, Dlamias, and the Maxiki home moon.
But I digress.
Our laying together proved relaxing to us both, and when she was nestled against me in the bed we shared, I would be lying if I said I could easily return to my former existence in general isolation.
The more I thought about it, the more the concept of human ‘pack like’ families appealed to me.
And I had a lot of time to think about it.
Unsurprisingly, a few days later a small team of six grief therapists arrived, three of them with experience dealing with what humans referred to as PTSD or, ‘Post Traumatic Stress Disorder’ or what Dlamias referred to as WIOS or ‘War Induced Outlier Syndrome’. In the past I would not have recognized it, but I cannot unsee what I have seen. And that is that the term ‘outlier’ in there is not just a medical identification for a traumatized soldier, but a deeply embedded mistrust of nonlinear thought and a noncompliance with the common cultural framework our government has approved.
In short, it helped make outliers appear inherently untrustworthy, though to their credit they recognized that soldiers were victims of this rather than internally flawed in some way.
I wasn’t present when the exerts arrived, but was present when the engineers on loan from Earth were assisting the Red Spark’s engineers with the installation of several virtual reality systems akin to what Bonny Red described as experiencing on board Captain Archer’s ship fifty years earlier.
Of course the new models were far more versatile and realistic, or so their chatter said.
“Yeah these things are great.” The skinny engineer in plain white overalls said as he tapped it, “There aren’t many like this one out there, the sense data is a lot more immersive, and the time dilation software is such that these Arachnae 9000 models can give you almost anything you want, thanks to their embedded creation kits. Now you can modify your games and customize them to your liking, and with Genesis mode, you can create your own world and games within it, and jump to other peoples designs on the network in the same way as long as they’ve either made it ‘public’ or given you a passkey access code.”
“That’ll make a good training system.” The engineer, Scotty, remarked. “Do we get to keep these after the mission?”
“Hell if I know. But…disconnecting them would be damn tough. And I don’t have a disconnect schedule date. So…probably?” The human remarked, “I’ve got to say, I envy you these things. Even the capital ships don’t all have these yet.”
I pretty quickly figured out that some of the humans on board the ship had pulled a few strings to get some entertainment on board the Red Spark. And probably done it quickly too, using the therapist costs as a late rider on a bill or something.
It was a guess, but I suspect, a good one.
As for the therapists themselves, as these systems were hooked up, the humans tested them and began installing the programs they would need. You might find this strange given that time dilating virtual simulators were used in the human confinement system of justice, as well as it simple games and the older models were used as toys to play games.
But as it turned out, virtual reality was also used in therapy.
I was able to briefly try one out while the therapists explained.
A therapist named ‘Carl’ went over it while the program ‘World of Healing’ loaded.
What began as a silent black world in which I stood, neither falling nor flying, nor seemingly standing on anything at all, stars came into view first, billions of tiny lights twinkling in the darkness. The sorts of things that inspired the dreams of generations.
Then there was grassland, rolling hills, and I was standing on soft earthen and green.
Then the hills loaded terraces with yet more greenery, and around them appeared little babbling brooks, creeks of water with the occasional small fish leaping through the water from one place to the next.
Then, young men and women clad in the outfits of human nurses, the traditional red and white shades.
The therapist appeared beside me a moment later, stepping out of the darkness as his avatar loaded. “Let there be light.” He said with a wave of his hand, and the sun began to rise in the distance. There was a strange warming sensation, like I’d stepped out into an early summer day, as well as the feel of a breeze, I looked down at my body, my hairs were moving.
“That’s good.” He said and cracked a little smile, he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Environments like this one are popular.” He said, “I actually worked on the development of some of these. The nurses,” he gestured to the unmoving simulations, “are designed to appear as nonthreatening as possible. Mostly female, but there is some demand for males as well. Do you know why?” He asked.
“No?” I didn’t, and as he began to walk down a trail of smooth stones that appeared beneath our feet, he explained.
“Do you know what the most common word among the wounded on the battlefield is?” He asked, and as we walked, I watched the scene continue to generate, the path leading to small islands of trees that swayed in the simulated breeze. I shook my head.
“Mother.” He replied. “Followed closely by ‘I’ and ‘want’ and ‘my’. In every language, the wounded scream for their mothers, even the fiercest, hardest, and most savage of men in their most painful hours, call for the one who provided care and comfort in their childhood. Usually, that is still the mother. Not always, mind you, but commonly.”
He smiled at the simulated nurse, and even without being activated, it made a radiant smile in return. “So we program the nurses of both sexes with simulated parental care and attention personalities. Ideally the personalities of the wounded based on known interview data are loaded beforehand to provide the best possible experience, thus allowing the AI to tailor itself to the needs of the wounded.”
I couldn’t deny I was impressed.
“And the environment?” I asked.
“A garden.” Carl replied, “Someone once said, ‘If any man has ever heard the voice of god, it was in a garden on a cool day.’ Our myths and legends often begin our existence in idyllic gardens. Of course we know those are just myths, stories. But it says something about our nature that when we need to create a paradise, ‘this’ is what we make.” He held his arms out as if to embrace the simulation.
“Running water has a calming effect, the feel of the ground and the breeze, the sun and the caring attendants, all serve to create the ideal environments for a group of wounded soldiers. The nurses,” he added, “can be taken over by real qualified people like myself to properly diagnose and help guide the healing of others. The truth is, we don’t heal anybody.”
“No?” I was surprised at his admission, and Carl stroked his russet beard and chuckled as he replied.
“No. A doctor of the body can claim he healed a disease or an injury. But people who deal with the mind, we are guides. That is all. PTSD isn’t something you ‘get over’. It doesn’t go away, it just goes from an open wound to a scar. It may hurt sometimes, like a scar, but it doesn’t have to dominate someone’s life. All we do, is try to make it easier for that scar to form. Environments like this?” He said rhetorically, “These are just ultra modern hospital beds.”
“Couldn’t you just, I don’t know, leave somebody in here for what feels like a hundred years until they’re a whole lot better?” I asked, and his head hung just a little.
“If we could do that, we would. But studies of simulation use show that long term continuous use makes it difficult to adapt to the real world again. In the distant past, astronauts who spent only a few weeks in space, took several days on Earth to remember that things they let go of wouldn’t just ‘float’ if they let go of them. I can only imagine how much coffee was wasted.”
He let out a mock gasp as we got to the little tree cluster where willow leaves hung in long strands to create a kind of gentle shadow casting barrier to the trunk within.
“If we leave somebody in a superhero game for what feels like a hundred years, they’ll try to use those powers in the real world. If we leave somebody here in paradise for a hundred years, they’ll no longer be able to function in reality. And time dilation in a simulation isn’t exactly the same as actually lived reality either. Even the best AI is predictable to a degree. The real world, not so much.”
That was unfortunate, but even so, I could see the use.
“So, an hour per day drawn out to a few days at a time for the grieving, the wounded, and whoever we need. We have simulations for almost everything. From the wounded veterans, to those who grieve the dead in a thousand times a thousand ways.” Carl seemed to me to be equal parts proud of, and saddened by, the existence of this simulated world.
“It gets really bad, doesn’t it?” I asked and out of curiosity, when we crossed a hill to find ourselves amidst an apple orchard, I reached up to pluck a bright red fruit from a branch. It felt so real in my hands. And there was even a real scent to it. ‘I wonder, can I taste it?’
“It does.” Carl replied. “A few decades ago there were some xenophobes who were protesting… something. I don’t remember what it was, I was a child at the time, but some of them managed to get a bunch of guns somewhere and took over a bridge and blocked a road. They brought out their wives and children to use as human shields, trying to force the government to kill them to create sympathy for their cause.”
The apple tasted fantastic, but at his words I coughed and spat and he slapped me several times on the back. This ran entirely counter to everything I’d studied in human society. My work showed that humans valued their offspring and mates to such an extreme degree that harming them was akin to suicide if the survivor got a chance to exact revenge.
“I see that sounds strange to you.” He affirmed and asked, “Are you alright?”
“Yes, yes but…” He slapped my back a few more times and then finished.
“There’s a subset of humans for whom mates and children are property, this is a dying cultural remnant of the past, but it dies hard. Xenophobes wouldn’t hesitate to use those they’re supposed to protect, as pawns for their vicious causes. My father actually worked with both the people who confronted them, and the unarmed people that were rescued.”
“How did it come out?” I asked.
“I was just a kid, I don’t know all the details. But the media stories that spun about it accused the xenophobes of every kind of abuse on their spouses and children, thousands of people were ‘doxxed’ when they posted support for the xenophobes actions. It’s like somebody was out to get them. It got messy, they were a laughing stock, referred to as maniacal cowards, and there were a lot of cartoons and comics where people whose faces and names were out there, became villains to be laughed at and despised. I guess pretty much any evil thing is easy to believe if you’ll put your own kid or your own spouse between you and a bullet just so other people will feel sad for you.” “I mean, were there deaths or…?” I wished I hadn’t asked, but he shook his head.
“No, not exactly. Some clever bastard came up with the idea of walling them in. They pushed these big metal walls into place to surround them, then tightened it up. Slid a roof overhead, and then gassed the lot of them with something to knock them out. There was a lot of gunfire, it made the news, but seeing them shooting at giant metal walls while hiding behind their families did nothing to help their cause. But there were a lot of people who needed mental healthcare to recover from that incident. That’s why I do what I do. My father did it, and I saw how badly it was needed. It’s kind of my purpose, I guess you could say.” Carl said and reached up to take a bite of an apple for himself.
“Tastes like reality.” He said, and then asked, “Have you seen enough?”
“Yes. But… thank you for coming, I think you can do a lot of good up here.” I said and he quickly recited the exit code.
“Admin Red Spark Arachnae nine thousand. Exit simulation.” He said, and the world faded away to nothing.
I was sure of one thing at least.
The wounded hearts were in good hands.
submitted by endersgame69 to TheWorldMaker [link] [comments]

2023.03.21 19:52 Exotic_Raspberry_387 Beard hair regrowth

Hi wonderful people! I'm a budding herbalist over here in the UK and I'm trying to create the perfect balm/tincture/tea to help my partner with beard hair loss. He's had medical tests and all come back negative, I'm just looking for something gentle to make for his skin. I was thinking teatree, rosemary, calendula. Any other thoughts?
His beard is very important to him, lots of very sad deeply personal reasons but anything I can do to help would be wonderful. Thank you clever hive mind!
submitted by Exotic_Raspberry_387 to herbalism [link] [comments]

2023.03.21 19:49 Glopuss Supermarket (Coles & Woolworths) specials March 22 - 28 (incomplete)

A selection of items “on special” this week in Coles and Woolworths that may be of interest to keto followers. Many are processed so not really suitable for “clean keto”. Victorian data, some may not be available interstate. Consider house brands may be cheaper than ‘specials’
Alcohol (except no carb beer) excluded. Drink prices exclude recycling deposits. Fruit & Veg probably vary by state, so excluded.
If you are doing an online order, I suggest you also look at the stores' ONLINE ONLY specials as I don't always include all of these, many are multibuys.
Coles ‘locked prices’ might now be considered specials but same every week til April so not included as specials


Coles web pages are a mess, prices showing as a special in the List function are not showing as specials when you drill down into details. So some of these prices cannot be trusted. To make matters worse, they have now taken down the old pages.


Woolies has a range of health products @ 30% off, I have put some under the Protein heading for convenience.
30% of all NOSHU
submitted by Glopuss to ketoaustralia [link] [comments]

2023.03.21 19:26 Tren-scending-limitz [ME] question about visitation and custody that puts kids at risk

25M Maine
So I personally have no rights to these kids, it's a really tough situation I am dating there mother and she's already filled for the divorce paperwork against the kids father (there is 2 kids, he is only the father to 1 of them but came in the other ones life (boy of 7) at the age of 3. His daughter is now 3, we tried to let them visit him on the weekends, while he stayed at someone else's residence because he doesn't have a place of his own, he texted us up one night (there break up was still fresh for him, but he knew it was coming she kicked him out and explained what was happening and that there was already to much trauma on the relationship and she didn't feel safe around him or that she could ever love him again) anyways we tried to let him have weekend visits and he got drunk one night while he had the kids, texted her up threatening to carve her name into his leg with a kitchen knife, so we do not let him see the kids anymore obviously, he is a two-time domestic violence offender towards her and multiple protection orders put on him both dropped by her after they were put on he's had to go to family violence classes ( which he took nothing from it even though he completed it, he still continued to be violent and lay hands on her afterwards, still continued to put cigarettes out on his wife, trap her in rooms and not let her out, he's shoved multiple times punched her in the stomach numerous other things, even forces her to have sex with him when she didn't want to, he is a bad alcoholic when he gets to drinking and he is bipolar (and from my Outlook on it, it seems as, when he drinks he gets schizophrenic episodes) he refuses to take medication or get put on any medication and you just finished signing the divorce paperwork and we are getting ready to go into custody battles as her boyfriend I do not know what to do but I do not believe the kids are safe around him but I also know I have no rights to the kids or any say. I have been paying for both kids and had there mother leave one of her jobs so she could be full time with the kids, I pay for everything and am totally happy to do so, but I've never had kids prior to this and I am totally lost looking for some advice please... Should she try for full custody and leave him with no visitation rights? Also her son's father ( the other baby daddy) she tried keeping away and the judge ordered weekend rights (he also didn't have all the violence issues and
submitted by Tren-scending-limitz to Custody [link] [comments]

2023.03.21 13:36 pizzasong SLP to MD or PA?

Hi all, I already have a successful career as a 34 year old speech therapist working in ICU/acute care. I'm also an adjunct instructor in SLP at several universities with my M.S. degree. I have a small family (married, 1 young child, looking to have one more soon) and I'm a homeowner. I can't relocate.
I'm in a position where I would like to change careers in the next 5-10 years as my kid(s) get older. SLP has been good enough to me but frankly I'm bored and frustrated with the lack of evidence based practice and lack of respect from other professionals. It has been many years since college but I had a roughly 4.0 in both undergrad and grad school, summa cum laude, etc. I am missing at least 5-8 necessary prereqs (a lot of my sciences didn't have labs). Never did extracurriculars. I live within easy commute distance of 3 great PA programs and 5-6 great med schools, and would only apply to these options.
I value:
I am trying to decide between medical school and PA school. Obviously there are pros and cons to both. Because I value flexibility and a predictable schedule, and because I'm getting older and already have a family, PA school appeals to me since it would be a faster turnaround to a new career. But I'm not sure the pay would be worth it (I can make about 80-90k as an SLP, only an easy jump to 120+ would be worthwhile to me). I'm also afraid of regretting never going the MD route. I love medicine, working in healthcare comes very easily to me. I have always received excellent feedback from my patients, I know I'm clever enough for it, and if I'm being honest I grew up in poverty/foster care and I think it would finally help with the chip on my shoulder and feel like I finally "made it" with an advanced professional degree (I also briefly considered law school at one point).
We made good financial decisions in our 20s, have maxed out retirement accounts for over a decade, and have enough in savings that we could live off my husband's income and savings alone for about 7-8 years comfortably if needed.
Just wondering if anyone else has been in a similar position and what you ultimately decided.
submitted by pizzasong to premed [link] [comments]

2023.03.21 13:23 plainenglish2 “Mr. Queen” (historical and cultural backgrounders for international viewers, with references to other K-dramas)

“Mr. Queen” (historical and cultural backgrounders for international viewers, with references to other K-dramas)
Index: Introduction; K-dramas are meant first (or primarily) for Korean viewers and only second for international viewers; A. The historical figures who were fictionalized in this drama; the rivalry between the Andong Kim and Poonyang Jo clans and “sedo politics” (royal in-law politics); lawsuit filed by descendants of a historical figure against “The Princess’s Man”; connections of “Mr. Queen” to “Moonlight Drawn By Clouds” aka “Love in the Moonlight” and to “Kingdom” Season 2, Ep. 4; B. Eps. 8 and 10: Persecution of Catholics during the Joseon Dynasty; the only K-drama I’ve seen that depicted the Catholic persecution in Joseon Korea is “Yi San, Wind in the Palace” (2007); C. Ep. 8: Korean seesaw (“neolttwigi”); D. Ep. 12: Surit-nal (Dano Festival); ceremonial robes and head gear of Joseon kings; E. Ep. 14: Ice as a valuable commodity during the Joseon Dynasty; F. Ep. 14: Donghak (religion, movement, peasant revolution); G. Ep. 16: Difference between “Jo” and “Jong” in the posthumous (temple) names of the Joseon kings; the Joseon kings’ royal portraits and dramas such as “Painter of the Wind” and “Saimdang”; H. Ep. 16: Secret Royal Investigators during the Joseon Dynasty; secret royal inpectors as depicted in “100 Days My Prince” and “Under The Queen's Umbrella”; I. Miscellaneous notes: Ep. 11: the fight with fans as weapons; “jangot” or head covering for noblewomen during the Joseon Dynasty ; the beautiful bridge across the pond in Ep. 1 and other episodes


K-dramas are meant first (or primarily) for Korean viewers and only second for international viewers. Just like in other dramas, the historical, cultural, and political references in “Mr. Queen” are well known to the Korean viewers. On the other hand, we, the international viewers, must dig deep into Wikipedia and other sources (or post questions in forums like this) so that we can understand what’s going on.

For example, some people who have seen “Mr. Queen” said that they couldn’t stand the court politics or the infighting between the different factions because the drama didn’t provide any context. Well, the court politics and the infighting between the different factions happened between the Andong Kim and Poonyang Jo clans, which are well known to Korean viewers and thus, no context was necessary.

When “Saimdang” was first broadcast in 2017, I joined the on-air discussions of the drama in the Soompi Forums. In that forum, whenever I had questions about the drama, I had two go-to persons: for questions about Korean language, culture, and history, I asked “gerrytan8063”; whenever I had questions about Chinese characters used in the drama, I asked “liddi.” I haven’t joined the Soompi discussions after I found reddit, and so I don’t know if “gerrytan8063” and “liddi” are still active there.

Where can we turn to when we, as international viewers, have questions about Korean language, culture, and history as they relate to K-dramas? There’s Quora, of course; “bodashiri” in Tumblr has a form in his website where he/she says, “Ask me anything.” Also, since 2012, the “Annals of the Joseon Dynasty” is being translated in English, with the project supposed to be finished in 2034. Certain portions of the English translation are available online, as you can read in “Globalization of Korean history” from the official Korean government history website.

Oh, maybe we can also use ChatGPT in learning about the historical, cultural, and language issues that we come across in K-dramas.

The very first K-drama that I watched in full was the 2014 blockbuster “My Love From The Star” starring Jun Ji-hyun and Kim Soo-hyun. In this drama, I first heard the term “Joseon Dynasty” and learned how the dynasty heavily influenced what Korea is today.

Before “My Love From The Star” however, I had seen one or two brief scenes from the 2003 blockbuster drama “A Jewel in the Palace” (aka “Dae Jang Geum”) starring Lee Young-ae. Sometime in 2005 or 2006, “A Jewel in the Palace” began sweeping the Philippines. Every night at around 6 o’clock, the streets would become empty, with people shouting to each other as they rush to their homes, “Jang Geum na!” (in English, “It’s Jang Geum time!”). Since that time, “A Jewel in the Palace” has been broadcast in the Philippines five times; that’s how popular it is among Filipinos.

I watched “A Jewel in the Palace” in its entirety only in 2015. Since then, I’ve seen each episode around four or five times already; whenever I feel depressed, I rewatch Ep. 6 where Jang Geum was exiled to the herb garden outside the palace. Needless to say, Lee Young-ae is the love of my life. Next to Lee Young-ae, I love Han Hyo-joo (“Dong Yi”), Han Hye-jin (“Jumong”), Han Ga-in (“The Moon That Embraces The Sun”), Moon Chae-won (“The Princess’s Man”), Park Shin Hye (“The Royal Tailor”), Shin Se-kyung (“Six Flying Dragons”), Park Ha-sun (Queen In-hyun in “Dong Yi”), Nana (“Into The Ring”), and Go Ara (“The Joseon Magician”), in that order.

A. The historical figures who were fictionalized in this drama; lawsuit filed by descendants of a historical figure against “The Princess’s Man” (Soompi); the rivalry between the Andong Kim and Poonyang Jo clans and “sedo politics” (royal in-law politics)

The main characters in “Mr. Queen” are So-yong (Queen Cheorin), played by Shin Hye-sun, and King Cheoljong, played by Kim Jung-hyun. Some of the secondary characters are Queen Sunwon (Grand Queen Dowager) of the Andong Kim clan and Queen Shinjeong (Queen Dowager) of the Poongyang Jo clan.

“Mr. Queen” is fictional, with the following genres: historical, comedy, time travel, and body swap. But its characters and background events are inspired by historical figures and events. For example, the lead character (King Cheoljong) and his background facts — growing up destitute on Ganghwa Island, puppet of the Andong Kim clan, relatives persecuted as Catholics, etc. — are all based on history. Also, the conflict between the Andong Kim clan and Poonyang Jo clan is historical.

King Cheoljong in “Mr. Queen” is a highly fictionalized character that’s different from the historical King Cheoljong. The drama portrays him to be secretly plotting to establish himself as a strong ruler against two warring political factions — the Andong Kim clan (led by Grand Dowager Queen Sunwon) and the Pungyang Jo clan (led by Dowager Queen Sinjeong).

A-1. Historical figures who were fictionalized in “Mr. Queen”:

(1) King Cheoljong

The 25th king of the Joseon Dynasty of Korea (25 July 1831 – 16 January 1864), he was a second cousin to the heirless Heonjong of Joseon, as well as a great-great grandson of Yeongjo of Joseon. He was chosen to become King by Senior Dowager Queen Sunwon (King Sunjo’s widow) and the powerful Andong Kim clan because he was illiterate and thus easy to manipulate.
Cheoljong ascended to the throne in 1849 at the age of 19 after King Heonjong died without an heir. As a distant relative of both the recently deceased king as well as a descendant of King Yeongjo, Cheoljong was selected for adoption by the Senior Dowager Queen Sunwon (King Sunjo’s widow) at the time and to allow him to ascend to the throne. The future Cheoljong was found on Ganghwa Island where his family had been in exile since the Catholic Persecution of 1801.
When the envoys (dispatched in order to seek for the future king) arrived on Ganghwa Island, they found the exiled remnants of the royal clan barely surviving in wretched poverty, and in the midst of that degradation, 19-year old Yi Won-beom was proclaimed King. Though from the start of the Joseon Dynasty Korean kings had given top priority to the education of their sons, Cheoljong could not even read a single word on the notice delivering congratulations to him on his elevation to the royal throne.
As part of the Andong Kim’s manipulation of Cheoljong, in 1851, the clan married Cheoljong to Kim Mun-geun’s daughter, known posthumously as Queen Cheor’in.
Cheoljong died at the age of 32 in 16 January 1864 (by suspected foul play by the Andong Kim clan, the same clan which made him king), without any surviving male heirs. Once again, it became necessary to search far back in the Yi lineage to find a candidate for the throne.

The only surviving [cropped] image of King Cheoljong
(2) Queen Cheorin: wife of King Cheoljong, also known as Queen Dowager Myeongsun (27 April 1837 – 12 June 1878).

Queen Cheorin belonged to the Andong Kim clan.

(3) Grand Dowager Queen: Queen Sunwon (8 June 1789 – 21 September 1857), also known as Queen Dowager Myeonggyeong, was the spouse of Sunjo of Joseon. She served as regent of Korea from 1834–1841 and from 1849–1852.

(4) Queen Dowager: Queen Shinjeong, also known as Queen Dowager Hyoyu, (21 January 1809 - 4 June 1890) was the only wife of Crown Prince Hyomyeong of Joseon and mother of King Heonjong of Joseon.

Queen Shinjeong belonged to the Poonyang Jo clan.

A-2. “Mr. Queen” was criticized for distorting history. Among the things that was criticized is the drama’s portrayal of the Queen Dowager (Queen Shinjeong in history) as being heavily involved in shamanism.

From “Descendants of Sin Sook-joo sue The Princess’ Man” (Soompi): “According to the Seoul District Court, 108 descendants of old Sin claimed a damage suit of KRW 3 billion [2.2 million US dollars] against the broadcasting company and the writer for negatively distorting the image of their ancestor Sin Sook-joo from the Chosun era.”

This lawsuit was filed in 2011; I couldn’t find any information about what happened to this lawsuit.

A-3: Andong Kim clan, Poongyang Jo clan, and “sedo politics” (royal in-law politics)

From New World Encyclopedia:

At the beginning of the 19th century, the Andong Kim clan, who had provided the Joseon state with several queens, had seized power almost everywhere in Korea. The social stagnation that resulted was a breeding ground for unrest. Corruption and embezzlement from the treasury and its inevitable exploitation were taken to extreme levels, and reached staggering proportions. One rebellion after another was accompanied by natural disasters.
The only aim of the Andong Kim clan was the preservation of their influence. Their fierce campaign to dominate the royal house had led to a situation in which almost all of the representatives of the royal family fled from Seoul. When the royal family produced intelligent and appropriate candidates for the accession, they were either accused of treason and executed or sent into exile, so when Heonjong died, leaving no son, no acceptable candidate could be found to succeed to the throne.

From “Exactly how much power did the Andong Kim Clan have in the Joseon court? How did they attain such power?” (Quora, by Michael L. Best) :

“How did the Andong Kim clan attain power? By intermarrying with the royal family, enthroning young and easy to control men as king, purging political rivals, and, very likely, killing off any king when they begin to threaten their power.”
“After Queen Jeongsun stepped down [in 1805 as regent of King Sunjo], Queen Sunwon’s father, Kim Jo-soon, began to make his move. Kim Jo-soon, who at that time was already of high rank within the royal court, began to purge all his political rivals to help secure the position of his family and political faction. At the same time corruption in the civil service examination increased, likely in the form of bribes to the Kim clan.”

The term “sedo politics” (royal in-law politics) describes the period 1800 to 1863 when national politics in Joseon was exclusively led by a few powerful royal in-law families, most notably the Andong Kim and Poongyang Jo clans.

From“Collusive Oligopolistic Politics: Sedo and the Political Structure of Early-Nineteenth-Century Choson Korea” by Tae Yeon Eom (2012 thesis, University of British Columbia):

In contemporary Korean historiography, the reign periods of King Sunjo (r. 1800-1834), King Hŏnjong (r.1834-1849), and King Ch’ŏlchong (r. 1849-1863) are generally called “The Era of Sedo Politics” in Chosŏn Korea (1392-1910). In contemporary Korean historiography, the political theme of sedo predominated after the death of King Chŏngjo (r. 1776-1800), when national politics was exclusively led by a few powerful royal in-law families, most notably the Andong Kim and P’ungyang Cho clans, for sixty-three years. Obviously, those two major clans enjoyed extensive political authority and high social status in the nineteenth century.


(1) Queen Shinjeong was portrayed by Chae Soo-bin in the 2016 hit “Moonlight Drawn By Clouds” aka “Love in The Moonlight." Queen Shinjeong’s husband Crown Prince Hyomyeong (King Munjo) was portrayed by Park Bo-gum.

(2) In Season 2 , Ep. 4 of “Kingdom,” Crown Prince Lee Chang visited in Ganghwa Island his distant relative Prince Noseong, an impoverished member of the royal family. The drama portrays Prince Noseong as a lowly fisherman but who’s a well-read man. This character was probably based on King Cheoljong (1831-1864), the last puppet king of the Andong Kim clan. Unlike the drama, however, in history, King Cheoljong was illiterate, which made it easy for him to be controlled by the Andong Kim clan.

“Kingdom” Season 2, Ep. 4
B. Eps. 8 and 10: References to the persecution of Catholics during the Joseon Dynasty

B-1. In Ep. 8, at around the 43:00 mark, Bong-hwan (Queen Cheorin) remembers what he learned in history classes about King Cheoljeong; among other things, he remembers that King Cheoljong’s “grandmother and aunt got killed by getting baptized.”

In Ep. 10, at around the 46:57 mark, the Royal Chef tells Queen Cheorin (Bong-hwan) that he lives alone because all of his family were killed in 1839. Queen Cheorin (Bong-hwan) then recalls that he was referring to the “Gihae Persecution.”

B-2. Some of the well-known persecution of Catholics during the Joseon Dynasty were the Sinyu Persecution of 1801, the Gihae Persecution of 1839, the Byeongo Persecution of 1846, and the Byeongin Persecution of 1866.

Relevant discussions:

From “A Brief History of the Catholic Church in Korea” (WSJ) : “The Sinyu Persecution - In 1801, more than 300 people were killed as the ruling Joseon Dynasty, under newly ascended King Sunjo, staged a clampdown on the Catholic Church in Korea, ostensibly because the religion clashed with ideals of Neo-Confucianism and threatened the social hierarchical system. Yi Seung-hun was among those executed.”

From “Korean Catholicism marked by volatile history“ (Korean JoongAng Daily) : “Catholic believers suffered numerous rounds of persecution - the Sinhae Persecution (1791), the Sinyu Persecution (1801) and the Byeongin Persecution (1866) to name just a few - with about 10,000 missionaries and believers killed over a century.”

B-3. The only K-drama I’ve watched that depicted the persecution of Catholics during the Joseon Dynasty is “Yi San, A Wind in the Palace.” In Eps. 60-61, the brother of FL Sung Song-yeon and his fellow Catholics were blamed and arrested for an assassination attempt against King Jeongjo.

C. Ep. 8: Korean seesaw (“neolttwigi”)

In the early part of Ep. 8, Queen Cheorin and her attendant play on a “neolttwigi” (Korean seesaw).

2nd photo from National Geographic by W. Robert Moore, circa 1931
From Folkency: “Neolttwigi (lit. jumping on a board) refers to seesawing, a traditional entertainment practiced mainly by women during the Lunar New Year season. A large rectangular board is supported in its middle by a round hay bundle and two players take turns pushing hard on their end of the board with their feet in order to make the other end spring up.”

It is thought that Yangban women developed “neolttwigi” to see over the walls that surrounded their homes, as women in traditional Korea were rarely allowed out of their living compounds, except at night. (Wikipedia, citing Rodney P. Carlisle, Encyclopedia of Play in Today’s Society, Volume 1)

D. Ep. 12: Surit-nal (Dano Festival); ceremonial robes and head gear of Joseon kings

In Ep. 12, King Cheoljong presides over the Royal Banquet during the celebration of the Surit-nal (Dano Festival). His ceremonial robe is called “gujangbok,” while the head gear is called “myeonryugwan” (The Talking Cupboard) .
The robe and head gear were worn by the King and the Crown Prince during special events; with the head gear, the more the number of strings, the higher the rank. The jade object that he’s holding is called the “hol” (or “okgyu” depending on the type of jade used to make it.

E. Ep. 14: Ice was a valuable commodity during the Joseon Dynasty.

In Ep. 14, the Grand Queen Dowager tells Queen Cheorin (Bong-hwan) that ice is a valuable commodity in Joseon.

From “Summer on ice: How ice became an essential part of summer life in Korea” (Korea Herald):

During the Joseon era (1392-1910), ice was a national asset under the control of the king, and accordingly, a luxury for noblemen.
Harvested from rivers and ponds in the winter, ice blocks were stored at facilities called “binggo.” They were used for ancestral rituals, for medical purposes and to keep food cool. Seoul districts Seobinggo and Dongbinggo have their origins in the history of ice storage.

From “Keeping food cool, the ancient way” (Korea JoongAng Daily) : “Since the year 505, or the 6th year of King Jijung’s reign, until the arrival of freon and electricity centuries later, Koreans used stone bunkers to store blocks of ice throughout the year. These seokbinggo, literally “stone ice storage,” were located around the country. Local governments sometimes delivered ice to palaces, but mostly used ice as a means to prevent special local products from spoiling on the way to a palace.”

From “Feeling the heat: The luxury of ice” in Joseon (Korea Times) by Robert Neff:

The Korean government maintained two large ice storage facilities at Seobinggo and Dongbingo, where huge slabs of river ice (nearly two meters long and about 12.5 centimeters thick) were covered with straw and preserved throughout the year. Court officials and others who possessed “bingpae” ― an ice ration card ― were regularly able to obtain a certain amount of this valuable commodity (based on their rank) for their own use.
The common people, however, had to either purchase ice on the black market or from ice merchants. The black market ice ― obtained illegally from one of the government ice storage facilities ― was probably considered to be safer but much more difficult to obtain and so most people had to rely on local ice vendors.


(1) “The Grand Heist” is a 2012 South Korean historical comedy film about a gang of 11 thieves who try to steal ice blocks from the royal storage, Seobingo, during the last years of the Joseon era.

(2) In Ep. 9 of “A Jewel in the Palace,” crisis hits as Lady Han falls sick and Jang Geum, with Keum Young, is left to prepare the food for the king and his entourage in the royal hunt. When the Head Eunuch tells Jang Geum and Keum Young that the king wants cold noodles, he asks them if they brought ice with them. (When I first saw this scene back in 2015, I thought, “What’s the big deal with ice?”)

(3) In Ep. 2 of “The Tale of Nokdu,” Yul Mu prepares for Dong Joo a dessert for breakfast. The gisaengs around him become awestruck after the package that his bodyguard brought turns out to be a small block of ice.

What Yul Mu prepared for Dong Joo is similar to “patbingsu” (“bingsu).” Bingsu was introduced to Korea during the Japanese colonial period, but according to “Snowy delights and variations on bingsu” (Korea Herald) , shaved ice treats existed even during the Joseon Dynasty.
This is a bit off-topic, but notice two things after Yul Mu’s bodyguard finishes chopping the ice into smaller pieces:

(a) Before sheathing his sword into the scabbard, the bodyguard makes a downward slash with his sword and with a quick wrist flick; he did this to get rid of the water that may create rust in his sword. A swordsman also does this after slashing an enemy; blood may also cause the sword to become rusty.
(b) The bodyguard sheaths his sword into the scabbard with the bladed side up. Why? Two reasons. One, if the bladed edge is sheathed with the bladed edge down, gravity will pull the blade down into the scabbard, causing the blade to become dull. Two, it seems that when a sword is sheathed with the blade up, it’s easier to unsheathe the sword and quickly attack an enemy.

(4) In Ep. 7 of Mr. Sunshine, Ae-shin and her servant Haman enjoy “patbingsu” (“bingsu”) in the French bakery.

F. Ep. 14: Donghak (religion, movement, peasant revolution)

In Ep. 14, the ministers threaten King Cheoljeong that if he does not order the execution of Dam Hyang (the little girl who saved Queen Cheorin from being poisoned), they will consider him as a supporter of the “Donghak” religion and its followers.

From Wikipedia:

Donghak (lit. “Eastern Learning”) was an academic movement in Korean Neo-Confucianism founded in 1860 by Choe Je-u. The Donghak movement arose as a reaction to seohak (“Western learning”), and called for a return to the “Way of Heaven.” While Donghak originated as a reform movement and revival of Confucian teachings, it gradually evolved into a religion known today as “Cheondoism” in Korea under the third patriarch.
Choe was alarmed by the intrusion of Christianity (Catholicism), and the Anglo-French occupation of Beijing. He believed that the best way to counter foreign influence in Korea was to introduce democracy, establish human rights and create a paradise on Earth independent of foreign interference.
In 1892 the small groups of the Donghak movement were united into a single Peasant Guerrilla Army or Donghak Peasants’ Army. The peasants worked in the fields during the day, but during the night, they armed themselves and raided government offices and killed rich landlords, traders, and foreigners. They confiscated their victims’ properties for redistribution.
Choe Je-u was executed as a criminal by the government. The movement was continued by Choe Si-Hyeong (1829–1898), who systematized its doctrine. He too was executed.

Related resources: “Gov’t to commemorate Donghak Peasant Revolution for 1st time” ; “Korea celebrates 125th anniversary of Donghak Peasant Revolution in 1894 (2020)”

G. Ep. 16: Difference between “Jo” and “Jong” in the posthumous (temple) names of the Joseon kings; the Joseon kings’ royal portraits and dramas such as “Painter of the Wind” and “Saimdang”

G-1. In Ep. 16, during the Royal Portrait painting session, Queen Cheorin wonders about the difference between between “Jo” and “Jong” in the posthumous (temple) names of the Joseon kings. The subtitles say that “jo” is added to the name of a king who’s honored for doing something great; on the other hand, “jong” is added to the name of a king who’s honored for his virtue. Well, this is just one of two reasons for the difference.

The website “dramasROK” in its in-depth article cites Korean historian Sul Min Suk who gives two reasons for the difference:

(1) Relationship of the king to his predecessor:

“If the successor was the king’s son – or next in line to the throne – then that king was given a posthumous title ending in JONG.
“BUT if the king was not next in line to the throne and started a new line within the Yi dynasty then his posthumous name was JO.”

(2) “The ending JO was given to the founder of the dynasty – Taejo – for great achievements establishing a new dynasty. And then his descendants were supposed to be named JONG. So in a way, the title JO could be considered superior to JONG. And from now on this was the case. JO was seen as a more elite title to JONG. It started with King Seonjo…”

Relevant discussions: Why was King Sejong named "Sejong" instead of "Sejo"? and “Rulers of the Joseon Dynasty and KDrama Interpretations”

G-2. The Joseon kings’ royal portraits and dramas such as “Painter of the Wind” and “Saimdang”

Only seven portraits of five Joseon kings remain today as the others were destroyed during the Korean War (1950-1953). These surviving portraits are those of King Sejong, King Yeongjo, King Jeongjo, King Cheoljong, King Gojong, and King Sunjong. You can view these portraits at the Royal Portrait Museum in Jeonju, Korea.
For a more detailed depiction of how the Joseon kings’ royal portraits were drawn according to strict standards, you can watch “Painter of the Wind” (2008; Eps. 10-11) and “Saimdang” (2017; Ep. 22).

H. Ep. 16: Secret Royal Investigators during the Joseon Dynasty; secret royal investigators as depicted in “100 Days My Prince” and “Under The Queen's Umbrella”

H-1. In Ep. 16, King Cheoljong sends his trusted man Hong as a secret royal investigator to the most corrupt place in south Joseon. In his confrontation with a nobleman in a gisaeng house, Hong displays his “mapae.”
From “Amhaeng-eosa - secret royal inspector in Joseon Kingdom”:

“They were undercover officials directly appointed by the king and were sent to local provinces to punish corrupt officials and comfort the sufferings of people while traveling incognito. The amhaeng-eosa system was one of the most excellent inspection systems in the world, the likes of which is very unique and hard to find in other countries.”
The “mapae” was the badge of the secret royal inspectors, and the number of horses carved on it indicated the number of horses that they could requisition from the royal stables (“saboksi”) in pursuit of their assignment. The secret royal inspectors also used the “mapae” to summon soldiers.

The book “Corea, The Hermit Kingdom” (1888) by William Elliott Griffis states several interesting things about the secret royal inspectors. They were called “The Messengers on the Dark Path,” and to prevent them from abusing their powers, they were secretly monitored by a “yashi” or “Night Messenger.” Griffis states:

“An E-sa, or commissioner, who is to be sent to a distant province to ascertain the popular feeling, or to report the conduct of certain officers, is also called ‘The Messenger on the Dark Path.’ He receives sealed orders from the king, which he must not open till beyond the city walls. Then, without even going to his own house, he must set out for his destination, the government providing his expenses. He bears the seal of his commission, a silver plate having the figure of a horse engraved on it. In some cases he has the power of life and death in his hands.
“Yet, even the Messenger of the Dark Path is not free from espionage, for after him forthwith follows his ‘double’ the yashi or Night Messenger, who reports on the conduct of the royal inspector and also on the affairs of each province through which he passes. The whereabouts of these emissaries are rarely discoverable by the people, as they travel in strict disguise, and unknown.
“This system corresponds almost exactly to that of the ometsuke (eye-appliers), for many centuries in use in Japan, but abolished by the Mikado’s government at the revolution of 1868. It was by means of these E-sa or spies that many of the Corean Christians of rank were marked for destruction. The system, though abominable in free countries, is yet an excellent medium between the throne and the subject, and serves as a wholesome check on official rapine and cruelty.”

H-2. Secret royal inspectors as depicted in "100 Days My Prince" and "Under the Queen’s Umbrella":

In Ep. 7 of “100 Days My Prince,” a royal secret inspector (“Amhaengeosa”) saves Yul and Hong-shim from the corrupt magistrate and Master Park. Hong-shim previously recognized that the man sleeping in her father’s room was a royal secret inspector because he was holding a “yuchuk” (a brazen ruler that inspectors used for several purposes, including making sure that the measurement system for taxation was correctly followed).
In Eps. 8-10 of “Under The Queen's Umbrella, as part of the contest, the Grand Princes and the princes disguise themselves as “secret royal inspectors” (“amhaeng-eosa”) in pursuit of the assignments given by King Lee Ho. In some scenes, you can see the inspectors’ seal (badge) and tool: the “mapae” and the “yuchuk.”

I. Miscellaneous notes: Ep. 11: the fight with fans as weapons; “jangot” or head covering for noblewomen during the Joseon Dynasty ; the beautiful bridge across the pond in Ep. 1 and other episodes

I-1. Ep. 11: During the festival, King Cheoljoeong and Kim Byeong-in fight using fans as requested by the Grand Queen Dowager. While they’re using ordinary fans, there’s actually a martial art system using a fan as a weapon.
From Wikipedia: Tessenjutsu (Japanese; lit. “iron fan technique”) is the martial art of the Japanese war fan (tessen). It is based on the use of the solid iron fan or the folding iron fan, which usually had eight or ten wood or iron ribs. The use of the war fan in combat is mentioned in early Japanese legends.

In Ep. 11 of “Saimdang,”Lee Gyeom fights off Min Chi-hyung’s men using his fan.

Related resources: War Fan Tessen Techniques and Why Samurai Carried and Fought with Fans Made of Metal

I-2. “Jangot” (alternative spelling ”changot”): similar to the outer jacket of a hanbok but with a collar and a ribbon for tying both sides; according to the principles of the Joseon Dynasty’s Confucianism, women were ordered not to show their face to men, so they would cover their faces in many ways while going out. (Wikipedia)
From “Veiling of Korean Women: The Neo-Confucian Influence in Comparison to the Veiling of Muslim Women” by Hye Ok Park (Claremont Graduate University, Department of History) :

Different types of veils
“There were several different types of veils, Sseugae, worn by Korean upper-class women: Nuhwool, a black sheer silk framed veil to cover from head to waist (Figure 3), Jangot, a head and face-covering in the shape of overcoat, usually made of green pure silk with purple collar and chest straps to be tied at the chin (Figure 4), and Sseugae chima or shorter Jangot, worn by the lower-ranking upper-class women (Figure 5).
“Lower-class common women were not subjected, or allowed, to wear any headdresses except for the purpose of protection from weather, hot or cold, in which case they wore a simple square piece of cloth, called cheoneui, folded in half diagonally and tied in the back of the head. It was common that they did not wear anything to cover their heads or faces when they went out on their own or accompanying a noble woman as seen in Figure 1 above.”

I-3. The beautiful bridge and pond shown below are used as the location for several scenes in “Mr. Queen”, starting with Ep. 1. This bridge is located in the Gungnamji Pond (Historic Site No. 135) in Seodong Park; it is Korea’s first artificial pond and was created by King Mu from the Baekje Dynasty. The bridge and pond have been used in other dramas such as “The Flower in Prison,” “The Joseon Gunman,” and “The Tale of Nokdu.”

(1) In digging up the historical and cultural backgrounders of the K-dramas that I watch, I rely on English language resources on the Internet. I don’t speak or read Korean, and so I can’t search through Naver. Those of you who read Korean or are more knowledgeable about Korean culture and history should correct whatever errors or omissions there may be in this discussion.

(2) Other discussions that I have posted on the historical and cultural backgrounders of K-historical dramas:

“Hotel Del Luna” (some cultural backgrounders for international viewers)
“The Princess’s Man” (award-winning 2011 drama starring Moon Chae-won and Park Si-hoo)
“The Flower in Prison” (blockbuster 2016 drama starring Jin Se-yeon and Go-soo; 34 of its 51 episodes reached more than 20% viewership)
“Jejoongwon” (2010 historical-medical drama starring Han Hye-jin, Yeon Jung-hoon, and Park Yong-woo; Dramabeans ranked this drama as number one in its review of 2010 dramas)
“Chinilpa” (mini history lesson from "Chicago Typewriter")
Historical paintings depicted in "Saimdang, Light’s Diary"
Historical backgrounders for “The Red Sleeve” (2021) and “Yi San” (2007) with parallels and differences between these dramas

(3) This discussion is rather long and may be a bit boring for those of you who don't like history. If you got tired reading this discussion, you can energize yourself by listening to Band-Maid’s performances during their 2022 USA tour. Band-Maid is an all-female Japanese band that mixes genres such as rock (hard, progressive, punk), metal, pop, jazz, and blues. Listen for example to “Freedom" (anthem; watch out for the drum solo); “Daydreaming" (power ballad; watch out for the lead guitar solo); “Wonderland” (rock-jazz-blues).
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2023.03.21 10:56 Stenv2 Cringe RWBY Unleashed! Episode 1.

Jemina: Okay so Stenv is busy working on that Watts satire.
Jimmy: That fool! He finally let his guard down enough! Hell that dragon bimbo isn't around anywhere to stop us. HAHAHAHA!!!
Rando: I mean... I think Cinder is pretty cool...
Jemina: She eats you though...
Rando: Yeah but I got over that ya know. Besides she's funny as heck.
Jimmy: You're only saying that because ProphetT keeps posting hot Cinder art.
Rando: Can't I like her for more than her looks?
Randi:... Is quietly reading her yaoi manga.
Jimmy: IDIOTS FOCUS! We can finally bring down this metaverse, by destroying the cringe inhibitors and then we shall become gods!
The Randos and Randis protest but Jimmy and Jemina cackle wildy, as they try to craft their own satire, not paying attention to the danger level warnings, and then everything goes critical! And reality buckles around them!!!!
The Two get sucked into the book and the metaverse goes back to normal.
Dragon!Cinder: Scoffs Idiots.
Rando: Yep... So... do I put on a spice or....?
Dragon!Cinder: I will think about it... you made it weird... gonna need time to process.
Stenv: Either way, might as well embrace this and see where it goes. I got the popcorn, and the souls of the damned.
Dragon!Cinder calls dibs on eating the souls of the damned, as this becomes a movie night, and they pop in the first episode of the book.

Episode 1

A distorted version of the OP plays, complete with heavy metal, and then the narration begins.
Salem's Voice: Wait.... what the fuck is that all about?
Ozpin's Voice: What?
Salem's Voice: It's all vague bullshit? And then we're in an argument of some kind? Like what the fuck?
Ozpin's Voice: I dunno, but I think the panning shot of Ruby is good setup.
Salem's Voice: Well maybe if you didn't act stupid. I wouldn't have to.
Ozpin's Voice: THAT'S IT!!!!
The two narrators start fighting, slapping noises in the background, as Roman quietly enters the store, trying to not pay attention to the domestic fight. Then a chair noise?
Roman: Exhales Just get this scene over with...
Shopkeep: Yeah can we run this along? I have like nine million other jobs to get to. I am basically the Larry of this show, Larry from Gumball, I basically keep the economy alive.
In the Background, Ruby is rocking out to Sonic Music.
Ruby: Huh? Finally notices people are in the store and takes off her headphones. Oh sup.
Roman: Okay could we just get to the fight scene?
Ruby:... Sure~ What do you think Cresccie?
Roman: You talk to your weapo-
Crescent Rose: FOR THE EMPEROR!!!
Roman: What the-
There's a blur of Red, as Ruby viciously snaps one thugs spine over her leg, and bashes two skulls together, and in a whirwind of violence, she wears an insane wolfish grin as she curbstomps out onto the street.
Roman: ...I don't wanna be in this scene anymore...
Ruby: Oh don't be like that~ I am sure you're cool, I mean you don't have a shit weapon like these mooks right?
Roman: Uhhh I got a cane that's also a gun... it's pretty sturdy...
Ruby: See not so bad... anything else?
Roman: Well I was supposed to get a cool semblance but...
Flashback to a meeting room, where Roman dozes off and Fiona the Sheep Faunus yoinks the box with his name on it, and swaps it out with her own.
Ruby: Oof...
Shopkeep: So can't you use your super speed to keep him from getting away?
Ruby: Probably...
Roman: Yeah but I am kinda needed for plot stuff... for some reason... Can't help but feel like we're forg-
A heel knocks him to the side, as Cinder proudly poses in front of the camera despite her model still being largely unfinished and in shadows.
Cinder: I AM HERE!!!
Ruby: Yeah but it's not your time yet!
Ruby: And you will! But it's not time...
Cinder: UGH but it's so boring sitting in that plane and waiting to get through this filler shit!!!
Roman: I think I lost a tooth. But Cindy c'mon, it will be fine.
Cinder: Nooooooo!!!!!! She stomps her foot on the ground with a huff and crossing her arms.
Roman: Tell you what.... I will get you a pumpkin latte... some magazines, some extra shoes... and a hug?
Cinder: ... Make it three hugs and we got a deal... She then turns to Ruby, gesturing with her hand to show she has eyes on Ruby. BUT MARK MY WORDS RUBY!!! WE WILL BE BALLER RIVALS!
Ruby: HATE YOU TOO!!! She says cheerfully blowing kisses at Cinder while flipping her off, and Cinder does the same while going off screen.
Ruby: So Roman back to... Oh... Clever boy....
Roman is already on the rooftop. Having run during the exchange between Ruby and Cinder.
Roman: Okay.... now I just...
Ruby: Heyo~~~
Roman: AH! How my character isn't scared of you is beyond me!
Ruby: Yeah but I am adorable~
Roman: You wield a weapon bigger than your body, that worships a corpse emperor--
Crescent Rose: HERETIC!!!
Roman: Can beat the shit out of grown men like a demented Sonic OC, or Scourge or Surge or... Takes out a few sonic comic books... Well you're not a rocker like Mina... but yeah... YOU'RE FUCKING TERRIFYING.
Ruby: Heehee. Still adorable tho!
Glynda: And then there's me...
Ruby and Roman stare at Glynda.
Roman: Holy shit you're hot.
Glynda: Yeah... a walking fetish I am. I look like a sexy librarian with a riding crop, clearly someone wants a dommy mommy. But at least I have a cool cape.
Ruby: Eyes twitch, as she inhales and exhales deeply.
Glynda and Roman: Ruby?
They start to get scared.
Ruby's breath gets even more erratic, as Crescent Rose quietly floats away from her, even he knows not to get in the way of what's coming.
Ruby: What. Is. That?
Ruby's left hand points with utter venom and hatred at Glynda's weapon of choice, a plain riding crop.
Glynda: It's my weapon. I think it's called uh... Pulls out her scroll and goes to the Wikia. Of course it would be called The Disciplinarian... Really leaning into those dominatrix vibes huh RoosterTeeth?
Glynda looks back up at Ruby and screams in panic and terror as the cute girls face has morphed into a full on black rage furious expression more akin to a savage wolf than anything as she bites the Riding Crop, and yanks it out of Glynda's hand.
Glynda leaps into Roman's arms in fear, who in turn leaps into Cinder's arm who came out to check the commotion, and now all three are scared shitless as Ruby grinds her teeth on the lazy yet surprisingly durable weapon.
Ruby: I could tolerate nameless thugs having shitty mono weapons. But a named character Glynda right?
Glynda: Yeah...?
Ruby: And what's your role again?
Glynda: I am a teacher at Beacon.... the vice principal?
Ruby: And they give you a fucking riding crop? Not even a wand thing or something else?
Ruby slowly turns around away from the trio, as she stares directly into the camera, then she punches it! Glass shattering and with a howl and snarl, she leaps past the hole she made, as Glynda and Roman and Cinder can only watch.
Ruby: Who da fuck are you?
Jimmy: Well... we technically made this satire... but...
Ruby: Oh well. You will just have to stand in for the writers.
Jemina: What does that mean?! And what are you doing with that Riding Crop?! OH GOD OH NO!!! PLEASE NOOOOOO!!!!!!
Screams of anguish and torment are followed, as only The Trio of characters left in the scene are watching what unfolds, that's so unspeakable it causes Crescent Rose to vomit, and for Cinder to cover Glynda's eyes, and Roman to cover Cinder's eyes.
Ruby: Now then. Where is your workshop?!
Jimmy: Gurgling noises, from being too horrifically beaten to be able to speak properly.
Ruby: Okay good~ Humming noises, and workshop noises, and then she finally exits out of the shattered hole. Oh and if I see another lazy weapon? I will be back for your skin.
Jimmy: Gurgling noises.
Ruby: SO! Either way.... Huh where did Roman and Cinder go?
Glynda: Gulps I drove them off?
Ruby: That works. So either way~ She cheerfully takes out a dufflebag, seemingly not noticing the blood smears left on her face. I made you some replacments for your weapon~
Firstly you're witchy~ Based on the Goodwitch from Wizard of Oz, and Harry Potter was popular at some point... Plus LOTR soooo I made you three options!
Glynda: Nods her head too scared to protest.
Ruby: So first! I got a broomstick, now admittedly should probably reserve that for.... Salami? Weird name.
Salem's Voice: IT'S SALEM!!!
Ozpin's Voice: HA!
Fight Noises resume.
Ruby: Either way. This looks like a very sleek sci-fi broom. But not only is it capable of flight, either through your semblance thingy... which was....? Oh we kinda skipped over that...
Glynda: Oh uh... it's telekinesis, and arguably the most busted semblance in the show... and for some reason has magic rune looking things....
Ruby: Huh neat. But yeah this can fly, shoot out missiles and is also an semi automatic!!! Or you can just use it for dust shenanigans, since it has a dust propellant system.
Glynda: Uh...
Ruby: Right right... you probably want something more compact! So option Two!
Tosses the Broom away, creating a massive explosion off screen that shakes the camera, making Jemina and Jimmy cry out in pain even more.
Ruby: So I did make a staff, but I get ya probably want a wand. Because Harry Potter, I even added in some butterfly motifs to better fit in with your theme. But also... CHECK DIS OUT!!!
Clicks a button, and the wand shoots Lasers! And another click of a different button also creates a lightsaber!
Ruby: Freaking cool right?!
Glynda: Uuu!
Ruby: Hehehe! Okay last option though... Because we can't let Roman have the only baller hat. Puts the wand to the side, next to it's dust cartridges.
So last but not least. Takes a velvet black witch's hat. Tada!!!
Glynda: Woah... it looks so elegant... so beautiful... but it's also a weapon?
Ruby: You know it! It's me Ruby Rose, there's nothing I can't make into a weapon... NOTHING!!!
But for this hat? So I leaned way more into the dust side of weaponry, because I think that's heavily unused. I figured with your semblance you could play around with Dust more, can't explain away the baller magic runes.
But the hat like Cinder's dress, is embedded with Dust, and we can even do chibi style gags where you can pull random objects and people out of it.
Glynda: SOLD!
Ruby: Wait really?
Glynda: I may not be in Chibi, but I would kill to be on it.
Ruby: YAY!!!!
Glynda: Happily puts on the gorgeous witch hat, that perfectly compliments her outfit.
Ruby: So an interrogation room?
Glynda: Well it is the exposition dump scene.
Ruby: Oh right! Wait... shouldn't my introduction have been clue enough? Then again I was randomly in the store.
Glynda: Yeah but you could argue sometimes Exposition dumps are neccessary. I mean it's not like we're going to get some random audience expy that the writers cram in just for the sake of exposition when there's already an exposition engine there right?
Ruby:... That's oddly specific....
The door finally opens before the conversation can continue, as Ozpin is wheeled in by Taiyang, Ozpin being in a full bodycast... from his offscreen wrestling with Salem.
Ruby: Yay! Daddy!!!
Ruby picks her dad up in a spine breaking hug, as he laughs, and takes out a box of strawberries, much to the little gremlins delight.
Ozpin: Okay... this weird thing... well I think we can safely say Ruby Rose is self explanatory... but uh....
Taiyang: She might have been a little unstable in school, but she will make a damn good huntress.
Glynda: Should we mention her uncle?
Taiyang: Ouch... I am right here I kno- Finally notices the hat. Holy shit that looks good on you.
Glynda: Thanks!
Ruby: Sooo next scene?
Yang: YAY SIS!
Ruby: Ow! But yeah she's my sister! So get out of the frame shippers...
Jaune slowly starts to get on screen.
Ruby: On Second thought...
Yang: Acts quickly shoving her tits in the camera. Hi folks! I am Yang! The Fun one! But also Ruby's sister... sooo if you ship her... Gimme those fics... but if it's with an abuser or someone way older...
Yang begins to squeeze the camera tightly closer to her chest, the screen beginning to crack.
Yang: There will be nowhere you can hide. She then lets go, and lightly tosses the camera away.
Ruby: Still this could be fun! Wonder what the next episode will be like?
Yang: So long as I get to punch everything? We're all good~
Abandoment issues: Bu-
Yang destroys his dick.
Yang: We're here. To have. Fun. FUCK OFF.

To be Continued.

Epilogue Omake.

Cinder happily purrs as she sips on her Pumpkin Latte, while snuggled up against Roman, Emerald, Mercury and Neo, all of them hugging her. As they watch Ever After, the Drew Barrymore Cinderella Movie.
Cinder: And next time! THANKS TO ME PEASANTS!!!! Next Episode will have Cardining Time!!!
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