2008 honda crv door lock problems

23 /// First Attempt To Write

2023.06.02 22:50 GoDSoN69 23 /// First Attempt To Write

This is first 3 chapters of the story , i would love to hear your thoughts about it <3
Just like any other day, I woke up and started my day with music. I convinced myself that this day would be a little different from the others. I quickly packed my belongings and headed off to work.
My job is a mixture of heaven and hell. It has its moments of fun and enjoyment, but the repetitive nature of the work makes it feel like a torturous loop. I find myself going through the same motions over and over again, and nothing seems to change. It's driving me to the point of insanity, as if I am both the tormentor and the tormented. As for the fun part, it exists, but it feels more like a peripheral character in a movie or a game, detached from the overall chaos. If asked about it, I would acknowledge its presence, but it doesn't truly make a significant impact. I often question why I continue to stay in this situation, but the answer is never consistent. Occasionally, there are moments that break the cycle and restore a sense of purpose. This perspective represents my optimistic view of these events.
The day started off like any other, but things took an unexpected turn. Within just a couple of minutes of arriving at the office, my "boss" called me in and offered me a promotion to a higher position. While it may sound cool to some, I found myself not caring all that much. In fact, it left me feeling more annoyed than anything else. As the news spread, everyone around me began clapping and smiling, as if they genuinely cared. It felt as though I was suddenly in the spotlight, being praised for becoming a golden slave. To me, this promotion felt like giving recognition to an artist long gone, almost meaningless and devoid of purpose.
Once I completed my tasks for the day, I was greeted by a line of my co-workers, presumably waiting to celebrate my promotion. However, deep down, all I truly desired was to abandon my desk, gather my belongings, head home, and indulge in some much-needed sleep. Unfortunately, that was far from reality, and I had to suppress my fatigue and carry on with the festivities.
We decided to head to a nearby bar for a drink. Since my co-workers weren't exactly my close friends, the situation felt quite awkward. I found myself unsure of whom to engage in conversation with or what exactly to do. Nevertheless, I resorted to simply drinking and trying to relax. However, I couldn't deny the fact that it wasn't an enjoyable experience. I couldn't deceive myself into thinking otherwise. There were some exchanges of words with a few individuals, but they remained mostly formal and superficial. The typical phrases like "You did a great job" or "I'm so happy for you" were exchanged, but the interaction lacked genuine depth. Our time at the bar didn't last long, and after about an hour or two, we decided to leave.
It frustrates me when things deviate from my plans, but circumstances led me to the point where I found myself driving my co-worker to her house. It felt like a sticky gum clinging to the sole of my shoe, an unavoidable inconvenience. Given the proximity of her residence to mine, I had no other option but to offer her a ride. We engaged in some conversation during the drive, and once I dropped her off at her house, my life returned to its usual rhythm.
During our one-hour journey in my car, our "friends" exchanged handshakes before hopping in. The first words that escaped her lips were, "What a nice car." Well, no surprise there. I was well aware of it being the sole area where I had invested my money. Nonetheless, I appreciated her politeness. Soon after, she began probing me with questions. Why hadn't I engaged in conversations with my colleagues? Why had I consistently avoided attending any parties? I had no choice but to conjure up some excuses (as expected). However, she saw right through my lies and confronted me. She insisted that I shouldn't isolate myself from them, even though she also believed they were nothing but emotionless robots. At that moment, a part of me longed to eradicate any joy she might derive from my car, yet there was another peculiar part of me that found some strange satisfaction in her remarks (although I couldn't explain why). Subsequently, she delved into the details of her own life, expressing her desires to completely overhaul everything and start afresh with a clean slate. I found myself increasingly perplexed by her willingness to divulge such personal matters to a stranger like myself. Though I couldn't fully comprehend her motives, her openness strangely made me feel good in some inexplicable way. As a result, I felt compelled to reciprocate and engage in conversation. However, it wasn't a lengthy or profound exchange. Rather, I found myself responding to her peculiar inquiries such as, "Why did you start working here?" or "What are your thoughts on her?" and "What do you think about him?" Even queries about my impressions of herself were thrown into the mix. Regarding her last question, I unintentionally responded with, "To be honest, after conversing with them, you come across as relatively normal." It might have been the worst thing to say to someone, but surprisingly, she seemed to appreciate my comment, evident from the expression on her face. Frustrated with myself for enjoying the conversation, I started to exert mental effort to find a way to bring it to an end. The only solution that came to mind was music. I suggested playing some tunes so that we could both listen and put an end to the less desirable topics we had been discussing. I played one of my playlists, expecting her to simply listen to some new and relaxing music. However, to my surprise, as soon as the song began, she looked at me with a gaze filled with adoration, similar to how I often gaze at the rain pouring from my window. In that moment, I realized I had made a mistake. From that point on, our conversation revolved entirely around the music group I loved the most. It was a mix of jealousy, anger, and happiness all at once, simply because she knew and shared a love for that band. As the ride continued, which seemed longer than it actually was, she cheerfully thanked me and bid me goodbye before swiftly exiting the car. To be honest, she wasn't as bad as I had initially assumed. She wasn't one of those mindless zombies; she possessed a thoughtful mind. It was even intriguing to hear her utter the words, "I want to break this cycle," although it wasn't exactly "my line." Despite not intending for it to happen, I found myself enjoying the journey back home.
Upon reaching my house, I swiftly locked the door behind me, seeking solace and privacy. I changed into more comfortable attire, allowing myself to unwind. With a press of a button, I filled the room with music, creating a soothing ambiance. Finally, I surrendered to the exhaustion and lay down, embracing the opportunity to rest and recharge.
Who Am I?
I don’t know, I feel lost within myself at times, going through life on autopilot, and this self-imposed detachment fills me with self-loathing. If my life were titled, it would likely begin with "Demo," symbolizing my belief that I have yet to tap into my life's full potential. I've merely skimmed through the pages of my own story, surrendering to a lack of effort in personal growth. I've never discovered a place where I truly feel like myself, where I can freely express my thoughts and emotions, without the need for a mask to conceal my inner self. Who am I? I am like a balloon filled with emotions, yearning for a needle to burst and release them all. I am akin to an unstoppable car desperately seeking brakes to slow down and find some respite. I am my mind, afflicted by a virus that spreads and threatens to undermine my entire future. At times, I long to halt my thoughts, to cease my own ignorance, to prevent my hate from harming me further, but I can’t, I am unable to do so. I am weak, a feeble human unable to exert control over my own mind. If someone were to inquire, I would describe myself as an ordinary individual who seemingly lives without purpose, and to some extent, that statement holds true. I lack compelling reasons to view my life through rose-colored glasses, to awaken each day and relish in its joys, or to envision a promising future ahead. I am a source of disappointment to myself, as well as to those who have crossed my path. I exist as a solitary figure, akin to an empty room left unvisited by others, solely due to my own departure from those who once loved, cared for, and held thoughts of me. I carry no regrets for the choices I've made, yet the pain lingers, the worry persists, and I am left feeling utterly miserable. My past has shaped the person I am today, a person who hesitates to even label themselves as human. I have transformed into a robotic being devoid of emotions, lacking in care and love. The only remaining thread that connects me to others is the deep-seated hatred I hold towards myself.
Who Am I?
I am "K," a 23-year-old man who lives alone and endures a job that I despise, merely swimming through life like a fish. Currently, nothing particularly interesting is happening in my life, but I hold onto hope, recognizing that it's just a free trial period. I have lived my life according to my own desires, experiencing both enjoyable moments and hardships along the way. In general, it has been an average journey that one would expect. I used to have a family, friends, and a girlfriend, but somewhere along the path that led me here, I lost them. I embarked on this journey with the intention of living life on my own terms, and while I am indeed doing so, it doesn't quite align with the life I had envisioned. Nevertheless, such is life, and now I find myself here. So, let me discuss the things I do and the things I enjoy. First and foremost, I have a fondness for driving. It provides me with a space where I can be alone with my thoughts. Within the confines of my mind, I find solace and peace. It is there that I experience personal growth, devise plans according to my own desires, and unfortunately, sometimes sabotage them as well. Music holds a special place in my heart as well. It serves as a lifeline, preventing me from descending into madness. While I appreciate my own company and the company of my thoughts, there are moments when rest and relaxation become necessary, and in those moments, music becomes the key to unlocking my inner sanctuary. As for my past, I do not wish to delve into it, for it does not define who I am in the present. It is merely a reflection of who I once was.
It's time to rest; this day has been filled with enough activities to leave me thoroughly exhausted.
After that day, everything seemed to continue in the same old routine. I focused on my work, returned home, and enjoyed listening to music. However, I did introduce a small change—I started having a drink to help relax my mind a bit. It was just one glass a day, and it made me feel refreshed. As for drinking and driving, I didn't really care much about it. I know it's important to value one's life, so if you do, congratulations. Just please don't bother me with your concerns. I'd rather not have my thoughts filled with that kind of stuff.
Alright, it's time for me to gather my belongings and depart.
It's around 6 PM and I find myself contemplating the idea of going out for a drink. I'm tired of the usual routine of drinking alone on my couch, watching movies, and going to sleep. I feel the need for a change. So, I make the decision to venture into a somewhat sketchy bar and let loose, even if it means spending all my hard-earned savings. With this thought in mind, time seems to pass by a little quicker. I gather my things and set off on my search for a suitable establishment. As I come across names like "BullHogs" and "BarBEER," I can't help but question their peculiar choices. However, I realize that it doesn't really matter since both places will likely offer a similar experience after a couple of drinks. In the end, luck leads me to a bar called "BarBEER," and little did I know the interesting events that awaited me there. I entered the bar and promptly ordered a glass of fine whiskey. I found a cozy corner to settle into, where I could enjoy my drink in peace. As I sipped on the smooth liquor, I simultaneously made some notes in my textbook, expressing my emotions and capturing the essence of my chaotic state of mind. After consuming four or five shots, if you could even call them shots, something unexpected occurred—a stroke of misfortune. I had never considered myself an unlucky person before; I understood that my problems and struggles were mostly of my own making. However, in that moment, it felt as though life had handed me a sour lemon without granting me the choice to turn it into lemonade. Lost in my thoughts and doodling indiscernible figures, the door swung open, and to my surprise, guess who walked in? Yes, Her, all alone, perhaps a little early for her date. She confidently took a seat directly across from my table. I wasn't sure if she had noticed me, and I secretly hoped she hadn't. Yet, as fate would have it, life seemed determined to prevent me from being alone lately. She waved her hand, and in that moment, my initial hope was that she was gesturing to someone behind me whom she knew. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. I found myself tucked away in a corner, the worst possible spot I could have chosen. Uncertain of how to proceed, I did what was expected—I mustered the courage to stand up and make a swift exit. Well, call me when I grow a spine to carry out such a bold move. In an attempt to signal the end of our interaction, I weakly waved my hand, hoping it would serve as the final gesture before we continued with our separate lives. To my astonishment, she promptly stood up and made her way toward my table, as if we were long-lost confidants. With an energetic voice and a smile that left me questioning its authenticity, she asked, "Are you alone or waiting for someone?" Her demeanor perplexed me. So I replied, "No, how about you?" She took a seat and remarked, "What a coincidence, I didn't expect to find you here." I couldn't help but wonder if I appeared to be someone who always existed in solitude. Perhaps that's how everyone perceived me—a loner without friends, resembling the quiet kid in school. But how could I blame them? That's exactly who I am at this moment, or perhaps always have been. "Yeah, what brings you here? Waiting for friends?" I inquired. She replied, "Well, to be honest, I just wanted to relax and maybe get a new haircut." She delivered that statement with the brightest smile, causing me to burst into laughter. "That's nice," I responded. "So, what do you want to drink? Let's choose the same kind so we can get drunk at the same time.
I realized that I had forgotten the initial reason for coming to the bar. My plans seemed to shift involuntarily, but at least we shared a common goal. Being in her presence brought a sense of calmness to me. Initially, I intended to have just one drink and then leave, but with each sip, the desire to stay grew stronger. As we continued, it felt like we were taking shots and exchanging glances. She would share funny jokes, and I would respond with a smile. However, something felt different. Our conversations veered towards movies, music, and various random topics. But as I started to contemplate her more deeply, I noticed a subtle change in her demeanor. Slowly, she began to tear up. "Is everything alright? Is there something you want to talk about?" I asked with concern. She simply shook her head, indicating that she didn't want to discuss it further. Then she asked, "Can we call it a day?" "Okay, no problem," I replied, trying to be understanding. "Do you want me to bring you home?" She shook her head slightly, rejecting that offer. "Do you want me to call you an Uber?" Again, she shook her head. I was feeling a bit dizzy myself at that point, making it difficult to think of any other options. "Can we go to my place?" I suggested, hoping to provide a safe and comfortable environment. She seemed taken aback by the idea. "Home, like my house?" I clarified. "Yes," she replied, her voice filled with a mix of uncertainty and vulnerability. I carefully guided her into my car, making sure she was comfortable and secure. As soon as she settled in, she fell into a deep slumber. I drove cautiously, navigating the roads with care to avoid any potholes. It frustrated me how the government seemed negligent in using taxpayers' money to fix such issues. The thought crossed my mind: Isn't it strange that I'm taking her to my place instead of her own? But she had requested it, so perhaps something had happened that she needed time to process. I resolved to find out the next day.
Who I Wanna Be?
Sometimes I contemplate the essence of being human, and I believe it lies in our ability to evolve and change. Just like software programs receive updates, our progression sets us apart and makes us superior. The capacity for personal growth and transformation is what distinguishes us. I yearn to continually improve and become the best version of myself, to rediscover the ability to express emotions freely, to regain the power of effective planning, and to have meaningful goals. Above all, I desire to restore hope within myself and create a sense of security. I want to develop into someone I can enjoy spending time with, someone with whom I can engage in lively conversations, playful activities, and even spirited debates. I aspire to outpace others in personal development, utilizing each day as an opportunity to learn something new, embracing mistakes and challenges as stepping stones toward improvement. I long to become a person who possesses the strength and resilience to effect positive change. Perhaps, that is the person I truly wish to be.
Who I Wanna Be?
I yearn to embrace my true self, to stay true to my beliefs and principles, and to honor the uniqueness of my individuality. I find solace in being authentic, holding onto my distinct tastes and perspectives. In my eyes, I have already attained a sense of self that feels perfect to me. I am determined to safeguard this essence and resist any external forces that might attempt to sway my vision of life. While others may not perceive it as perfect or even satisfactory by societal standards, I firmly believe that staying true to oneself is the key to becoming the best version of oneself. I aspire to be the person in the future who truly understands and appreciates the person I am today, someone who shares my passions, loves what I love, and despises what I despise. I aim to remain steadfast and unaffected by life's challenges, experiences, people, and even love. I refuse to mold myself to fit into societal circles or change who I am for the sake of others. Instead, I aspire to be a catalyst for positive change, encouraging others to see reality through the lens of truth and growth, just as I do.
Good morning. How did you sleep?
Oh, hey. I almost forgot you were here.
Sorry about that. I was just...
Don't worry. If you don't want to talk about it, I can understand.
She nodded with a smile on her face.
Can we go to work together? she asked. She had already prepared breakfast for us. It felt strange, after living alone for so long, to have someone to converse with in the morning. Usually, I would talk to myself, so it was a refreshing change to have a taste of "normalcy." We chatted a bit and then headed to work.
The day at work was pretty much the same. The only thing that bothered me was arriving together, but nobody seemed to care. It was just me overthinking things. We didn't talk much at work, maybe because she didn't want to be seen with me. But whatever, when we finished, she politely shook hands, and we went our separate ways as if nothing had ever happened. Well, nothing did happen, to be honest with myself. I was hoping for a conversation and a different ending to our two coincidental encounters. Oh well, I guess it's back to my own life. At least I have to endure three more days until my paycheck, which will be a little thicker than usual. On my way home, I pondered what I could buy or if I should go somewhere.
The next three days crawled by slowly, with nothing interesting happening. They were just typical work days where I remained quiet, almost forgetting how to engage in conversation. At least the silver lining was that I didn't have to talk much with anyone. The only thing that worried me was her, although just a little. We had gone our separate ways after our last encounter, and since then, she hadn't shown up at work. Perhaps she was sick? I couldn't be certain, and I didn't want to ask anyone about her either. I didn't want them to think we were friends or anything.
On Friday night, as I made my way home, I made a decision to step out of my comfort zone. I was unable to think of anything material that could bring me joy or excitement. Instead, I opted to visit my "family." I purchased some gifts for them and embarked on a long drive to visit my "family." As I drove, I found solace in the company of my car and the music playing. The night unfolded pleasantly as they expressed their joy at my visit, or perhaps simply at having company. I remain skeptical about people's capacity for change, which is why I found myself listening to their conversation with a detached air. They reminisced about the "love of my life" and how she had supposedly made me a better person. They believed it was a mistake that we broke up, but I remained silent, only nodding in response to avoid entering into a debate or discussion. It's moments like these that remind me why I don't visit them often. Eventually, we retired for the night.
Can I Love?
Sometimes I perceive love as nothing more than a challenge that we must overcome. It feels like a weakness, a hindrance in real life. It has the power to make us vulnerable, fearful, and apprehensive. Love seems like an unnecessary hurdle that we can choose to skip or avoid, just to make our lives a little bit easier. Can I love? Yes, I believe I have already fulfilled my part in that quest. I have experienced it, lived through it, but ultimately managed to escape its grasp. Some may argue that love is the only thing that truly matters in life, but I beg to differ. I believe that what truly matters is knowing what you want and need. In my case, I desired love and willingly fell into that emotional abyss, only to realize later that it wasn't what I truly needed. It's a realization that has shaped my perspective on love and its place in my life.
Can I Love?
I don't think I possess the strength to love. How can I love someone when I don't even love myself? Love is a powerful force that requires inner strength. It provides motivation and gives us a purpose to live, not only for others but, most importantly, for ourselves. Love necessitates dedication, trust, and hope, qualities that I currently lack. Trust, in particular, is an arduous trait for me to attain. How can I extend love to someone if I don't trust them? While I have experienced love before, I question whether I truly loved at all. I doubt I possessed the strength to sustain it. I question if I even deserved it, which is why I never truly experienced its full benefits. Can I love? No, I believe I am not capable of loving someone or changing for anyone. I don't feel deserving of love.
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2023.06.02 22:50 shrubby18 2022 Accord Hybrid EX-L Impressions after 2 Months

So i used to have a 2017 Hyundai Sonata Sport and traded in that car for a used 2022 Accord Hybrid EX-L with 5k miles on it. Mostly for the better mileage 35mpg vs 48mpg advertised
Here are my initial impressions of the Honda vs a 5 year old Hyundai after a couple months.
  1. Honda poor turning radius, can't pull into a lot of places because i have to stop and back up and pull in. Hyundai runs circles around it. Had very little problems in the same parking lots.
  2. No hood struts on the Honda? Like really for the amount you pay and the hood still only has a stick to hold it up and it's a very heavy hood as a small person would probably have trouble getting open. The cheap Hyundai had it as standard.
  3. No door sills, Again the cheap Hyundai had at least cheap plastic ones so you don't scratch your sill getting in and out with heels or boots.
  4. Auto trunk opening as you stand next to it only available on touring model. Mid level Sonata sport has it standard. This is really nice if you have you hands full and you walk up and the trunk pops open.
  5. While the Hyundai doesn't have wireless Android Auto the add on you can by works flawless and connects every time. The Honda version is hit or miss a lot of times and when it does connect it can take several minutes if it does connect.
  6. Wireless charging the Hyundai doesn't have either but the after market versions do a great job while the Honda version has a hard time keeping up with the charge especially if you're Android Auto or Car play running it seems. The phone gets very hot sometimes and would do good to have some venting/cooling in that compartment. Sometimes i have to plug directly into the USB charging to get it up to a good level.
  7. No auto cruise control on the Hyundai model i had. The Honda seems to do weird things like wanting to follow cars off into turn lanes or brake for cars in turn lanes as you're passing them.
  8. No auto breaking on the Hyundai model i had. The Honda can break hard and be jerky, seems it needs some more refinement on this and still warns you to brake! haha isn't that what auto braking is supposed to do for you?
  9. No lane keep assist on the Hyundai model i had. This is kind of weird also as it will want you to go with the turn lane and you have to fight it to keep with the main traffic lane sometimes. It will tell you to keeps hands on the wheel on long stretches' where you don't need to steer because it's a straight so you have to move the staring wheel to appease it lol. I think this may be the reason this car was used with only 5k miles on it.
  10. Engine noise during acceleration on both cars are loud yes because they are 4 cylinders but i thought the Honda would be more quiet with the electric motors but it seems to sound like it straining hard.
  11. Both have poor interior lighting and have replaced with LED's vs incandescent bulbs. Why do they even used those anymore?
  12. With Hypermiling the Honda i can get 55mpg but avg 52 on my daily combined city/highway driving. The Hyundai Hypermiling the best i could get was 39mpg. Both get around 600 miles on a tank 18gals on the Hyundai vs 12gals on the Honda. While Hyundai makes a a Hybrid Sonata, i've heard stories where you can't start the car if it's left for a few days like at the airport and coming back to a dead car so i chose the Honda because of that.
  13. 100k mile drive train warranty standard on the Hyundai, Option to buy up on the Honda. 5yr 60k miles standard bumper to bumper on the Hyundai, 3yr 36k miles on the Honda. One of the reasons i switched from my Civics to a Sonata.
So some things are a bit nit picking i know but it seems some standard equipment have just been short changed on the Honda for the level of vehicle.
I'll be looking to put struts on the hood and maybe there's a hack for the trunk opening?
What's everyone elses impressions/thoughts???
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2023.06.02 22:41 anxietysucks93 Am I [25M] being emotionally abused by my girlfriend [25F]? How can I convince myself I don’t deserve this treatment if so?

I’ve [25M] been with her [25F] for 7 years. I will admit I am far from perfect. In the beginning I was very jealous in a way that was possessive. I can be distant, inconsiderate, unthoughtful, etc. There are times where I avoid seeing her because I can’t handle the anxiety I feel when conflict arises with her and I almost never have any sense of security that we won’t wind up in a serious fight before the day is over. I’ll also add that I have long dealt with bad anxiety and I have a very hard time not expecting the worst in nearly every situation which makes it very hard to trust my gut on things. I will also say she really can be an angel sometimes. She can have the best thing to say when you’re down, she can be extremely thoughtful, she can be such a fun person to be around.
That being said, she has had a very traumatic childhood and life overall and has a very angry side to her that feels she is mistreated, or in her words “treated like shit” or “not treated like a human being” by most people. Literally everyone in her life that I’ve seen her be close with is currently cut off or is back in her life after being cut off, myself included. She gets in a bad mood and does things that I just feel are disrespectful or show a lack of consideration for my well being and very occasionally will go into a rage and do things that outright scare me. While some of these things are single events and not the norm they still scare me because I feel like these things would not happen even once were I in a more stable relationship. Some of these things include:
-Mentions breaking up with me every time there is a conflict knowing how it sets off my anxiety and knowing she doesn’t mean it (has told me that I should also know she doesn’t mean it) - Broke up with me on my 21st birthday and accused me of “wanting her to put her feelings on hold for me” when I later brought it up during an argument - Left front door open while rushing to leave my house to go to something very important. Woke up and saw, noticed my cat was gone, frantically called her to come back to help me look. She refused. Later blamed me as I hadn’t called maintenance to fix the door (which was admittedly fucked up and hard to close) and framed me asking her to come back as “me putting the cats life above hers.” - Maintains relationships of some sort with other men who have made clear sexual advances, compares me negatively to them, rubs it in my face when they do things like Uber her some food, etc. I genuinely don’t think she’s ever cheated, just that she does this to keep me in a state of feeling in competition for her so that I try harder to please her. One of them had previously gone into a rage one day over text after she rejected an advance of his and had told her he would “slap me in front of her” (apparently it’s okay because he apologized). I’m 90% sure she later gave him my address to come pick her up after we argued and she decided she wants to break up. Feel like she actively put me in harms way by telling him where I live even though nothing else ended up happening. -Is sometimes pretty indifferent when I am going through something hard due to her feeling that I feel the same way about her. Has told me I don’t have “actual problems”, has talked about how she “wishes her problems were trivial like everyone else’s” etc -Has me park in handicap spots and risk getting a ticket to save her steps when she’s running into a store to quickly grab something - Told me she “thought about” having her brother go fight my friend after she found out he told me I should leave her - Has said during arguments that she doesn’t want to see me in person because she might hit me - Has blurted out “where’s my blade” then locked herself in the bathroom during arguments most likely to make me think she is going to hurt herself because of me - One time tried to destroy a gift she made me, another time tore an entire cardboard box into small pieces out of rage during an argument -Has threatened to “come over and cause a scene” once when arguing on the phone - Once said that “she thought about trashing my room and leaving a message in her blood on my wall”, accused me of wanting her dead and then said “she’s going to give me what I want” (She had never said anything even close to this since but it is still the thing that scared me most)
I feel like I’m in limbo and I can’t take it anymore. I have for years been at the point where I can’t bring myself to talk to her about things that bother me because I am so scared of making her angry and what might happen, as well as being discouraged from being shut down so many times when I tried to speak up about things earlier in our relationship before I developed this fear. On top of that part me of feels she is right and is justified to act the way she acts and that I am genuinely an unloving and unthoughtful person who deserves to feel bad about it. She’s the only person I’m close to that has at least spoken up about having this opinion of me and she also has this same opinion about most people but Im at the point where it doesn’t make a difference in my self image if my mom or a good friend says something nice about me because I feel like maybe they just don’t know me like she knows me, or like she has said in the past maybe they are just being yes men. Part of me believes that despite me having genuine flaws I don’t deserve this, that this relationship is abusive, and that I am putting myself in serious danger by staying while another part of me feels I am at fault and am exaggerating the severity to myself. Is there a chance that I am? If not, how can I fully convince myself that I shouldn’t put up with this so I can at least bring myself to speak up about my feelings?
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2023.06.02 21:53 lilgthakilla Tears of the Kingdom ruined my life

So I (25f) just moved into my boyfriend’s (31m) apartment in January and brought my switch over bc we are both Zelda fanatics and he wanted to play BOTW which I was cool with because it was my all time favorite game, and I love watching game play just as much as actually playing. All was good… until… they released TOTK.
He works during the day and I’m a streamer so I work at night, but I’m spending my days running our errands so I don’t have much time to play during the day.
But man when I tell you…. TOTK absolutely SHITS on BOTW. In the beginning I was only letting myself play for 2 hours before he got home from work then I would cook dinner.
That slowly crept into me playing more after he went to bed. Then i started playing after dinner while he was watching tv, i would bring the console out on the porch so we could still spend physical time together. Then it crept into me playing on the tv in a different room completely neglecting him. When I tell you, there is absolutely NO sense of time when playing this game. It just basically doesn’t exist. I feel like I’m on it 45 minutes then boom - it’s 5 am. I basically am getting in bed when he’s getting up to go to work. I just downloaded it last week and I’ve already logged 50 freaking HOURS!
This happened three nights in a row, and it’s starting to be a problem obviously… but last night was the last straw. As he was going to bed he told me it was time to get off and I should go to bed, he tried to physically grab my controller and I YANKED IT OUT OF HIS HAND LIKE A CRACKHEAD. It’s getting so bad I’m also not streaming hardly at all and I’ve been canceling all of my plans with friends, family, etc.
I kept playing that night until 1 am when my TV started tilting off the mount. I’ll try and paint a picture here, but there’s like a big glass tv stand under the Tv that’s also mounted to the wall that’s a fire place and holds our consoles.
Anyways, I’m pretty short so I had to put my knee up on it to tilt the TV back and the whole glass stand fell off the wall and SHATTERED ALL OVER THE FLOOR!!! ALL BC I COULDNT GET OFF THE GAME.
Obviously he heard this loud ass bang and came out and just laughed at me (like when you’re so angry you just laugh instead of scream) and told me to leave (I have a 2nd apartment in the same building where I do my streaming) so I went down there and was freaking out.
So what do I do? It’s 2 am, I refuse to leave that mess just sitting there for me to wake up and see and be reminded of my severe TOTK addiction. So naturally, I call my usual handyman and shockingly he answers!!! It’s 2 am! He said he can be there in 30 minutes.
I meet him in the parking garage and he brought this huge truck with a trailer of tools hitched up and it was a nightmare getting him to park!!! Finally we get up to the sh*tshow of destruction apartment and… boom.. he locked me out…
So I have to start banging on the door waking this poor man up AGAIN and he answers the door NAKED AND SEES ME STANDING THERE WITH A RANDOM GUY AND A TOOL BOX AT 3 am!!!!!!
He just looks at me shakes his head let’s us in and goes to bed. I tell handyman we gotta be quick and quiet but this has to fixed asap. he started to fix it but begins DRILLING IT INTO THE WALL WHICH IS THE WALL CONNECTED TO THE BED ROOM (what a nightmare)
Obviously bf is beyond pissed. Whatever, tv stand fireplace thing is fixed. But guess what I decide to do? Take my switch and KEEP PLAYING IN THE CLOSET. I black out at some point, probably around 5 am,with no recollection of anything after I got in the closet, sprawled out on the carpet floor, controller STILL IN MY HAND and a side of ranch and a quesadilla in the other. I crawl into our bed and woke up at around 10:30 am.
I start looking for my switch. I look in the closet, the bedroom, the living room, ….. it’s no where.
I go down to our second apartment where my boyfriend is working, we both use it for work, thinking maybe I brought it down there? Nope.
I sit down look him in the eyes and go “where’s the switch”he just smiles…. And says “you know where it is :)”
Then it dawned on me. “You put it in your f*cking safe didnt you”
“Yup :)”
Like I know I was getting realllly addicted, but I’m mostly pissed bc ATLEAST LET ME BEAT THE GAME AND I PROMISE ILL NEVER PLAY IT AGAIN. The thing about these Zelda games is is that they’re really never over lol. When will I be getting back you ask? We may never know…
I know it’s probably for my own good and the good of our relationship, but I’m so pissed right now I can’t hardly speak to him I wanna cry and scream and I feel like I’m going through withdrawals. I love him but I also want to unalive him and myself.
If you care about anything good in this world, don’t download TOTK because you WILL care about Hyrule more.
TLDR: severe Zelda addiction making me broke financially, romantically, and physically (broke our tv console stand). Bf locked it in his safe and now I’m grieving and depressed. play at your own risk….
submitted by lilgthakilla to tearsofthekingdom [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 21:38 Treeleafweather What items and new habits help you?

I'm interested in stuff therapists don't tell you. Examples:
submitted by Treeleafweather to schizophrenia [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 21:08 AccomplishedKale795 Ben Gross : The Cat Dad

Ben had never thought that he would ever be a cat dad, not since he saw his own father run over his cat when he was only five. But yesterday, history almost repeated itself when he almost ran over two stray kittens while driving himself home from the graduation ceremony.
It had happened only a few hours ago - despite the fact that in an attempt to impress his dad, who was in the passenger seat, he had tried to be extra precise while backing out of his parking spot, he missed a little something in his way.
However, before the disaster could happen, a shrill scream made him slam the brakes.
"STOP! You'll run over them, STOP!"
He jumped out the car and ran to the back, to find Shira looking slightly wary of a cardboard box near one of his back wheels. Inside the box were two kittens.
"BEN!" she shrieked on seeing him, her arms flailing in an almost comical way, "You almost killed them!"
Ben picked up the box, and noticed that there was a small slip of paper inside it.
"You should be more mindful of how you treat animals, Ben! We're supposed to share the planet with them, not-"
"Here, hold it for a moment" he interrupted, holding out the box for her to take.
She did not comply. Instead, she scooted away with a scared look on her face.
It took every last ounce of resilience inside Ben to not roll his eyes. Here she was, lecturing him about being 'mindful' with animals, when she was too disgusted to hold a box with two tiny, malnourished sleeping kittens.
Balancing the box in one hand, he pulled out the slip of paper and opened it.
"Take care of them, please" it read.
Take care of them. Hm. Someone left them here to be found.
After a moment of pondering, he made his decision.
"I'll take them to a shelter." he told Shira, opening the car door to put the two kittens inside.
"Wait!" Shira exclaimed, pulling out her phone and positioning herself as if to take a selfie.
"Shira, I'm really not in the mood to-" Ben began protesting, but the sound her phone made told him she had refused to listen to him. She skipped away, typing what he was sure was a story about how she saved two innocent kittens.
Her followers will like that, for sure.
Still, I'm rescuing two kittens from certain death. That's a good deed.
His good deed, however, remained unfinished, because the shelter did not have any space for cats and could not take in the two kittens. Ben was forced to take the kittens home, with the reassurance that his dad would find a place for them somewhere else.
And now here he was, having cleaned and fed them with Patty, trying to figure out what variety they were while shovelling spahgetti into his mouth.
"Oh, Ben! My sweet boy has graduated!" a saccharine voice suddenly spoke.
His mother.
Vivian Gross, unlike his dad, had chosen to be absent from his graduation ceremony, where he and Devi had jointly recieved the title of valedictorian. His dad had hugged him tightly and exclaimed how proud he was of his son with tears in his eyes. Ben knew he would remember that moment and smile till the day he died, he would be forever grateful for it, but it didn't quite erase the truth - he had expected his mother to show up. This was not a PTA meeting, not a debate tournament, not a club presentation - he has graduated high school. This was important. Today, for one day, he was important.
Apparently not important enough for his mother to abandon her regenerative healing spa appointment.
He did not want to admit it, but a sinking weight had appeared in his chest when his dad had informed him that his mom wasn't coming at all, and it had only dulled slightly since then. On hearing her voice, the weight re-appeared with full force. She pulled out a chair and sat beside him at the dinner table.
"No phone! Be respectful when your mother wants to talk to you, alright?"
Ben immediately put his phone down.
"So, have you thought about college, honey? Where would you like to go?"
Ben tried his best to not let the sheer disbelief show on his face. After all, 3he should have seen this coming.
"Uh, yeah, I - I applied to Columbia. The acceptance letter arrived two months ago. I got in. I'm pretty sure I told both you and dad?"
"You did? Oh, I must have forgotten! Typical me, forgetting things all the time."
It isn't normal to forget what ivy league your son got int- no, no Ben, don't be ungrateful. Don't say anything.
Well, I'm not being ungrateful here. She should've known this.
Before Ben could decide whether or not to convey his true feelings on the matter, Vivian cut the conversation short by pulling her phone out of her purse and beginning to scroll through it. Whether she ignored or didn't hear his scoff, he did not know.
After some time, she spoke up again.
"Oh, you and your girlfriend rescued kittens today? That's so nice!"
"My girlfriend?"
"Shira! She's your girlfriend, isn't she? I'm one of her followers! Very sweet girl, understands the importance of self-care very well."
He opened his mouth to say something, but no words came out for a bit.
"Mum" he began, drawing a deep breath and trying to control the quiver in his voice "Shira and I broke up two years ago, in sophomore year."
You'd know that if you knew anything.
"Huh? Oh! So you haven't had a girlfriend since?"
"No." he mumbled back, realising it wasn't worth it to explain anything to her. If his mom didn't care enough to know everything that had happened in his life in two years, then he didn't care enough to tell her either.
Ben had always thought the fault was in him. After all, he was richer than most kids in his class, he knew that - he had everything. And yet he felt unhappy. He felt unhappy despite having everything, hence he must be ungrateful.
But he had come to understand he was anything but ungrateful. His dad was the one who was always busy, but he had tried - he had become a better parent. He had been there for Ben. He had showed up.
His mother had chosen not to, and it certainly wasn't his fault. Mothers didn't behave like that - he had met Nalini Vishwakumar. He had to fight the urge to yell some sense into Devi every time she said she hated her mom.
She's ungrateful. I'm not.
This realisation had made him colder towards his mother. He realised it, but was even more hurt by the fact that she didn't notice this at all.
"Well, what did you end up doing with the kittens anyways?"
"The shelter didn't have space for them, so I brought them home. They're in my bedroom. I'll keep them until Dad finds a spot for them." he said.
The silence that followed made him look up from his plate, to find his mother staring back at him with disgust.
"You let stray animals into my house?"
"Stray - what? But you just said it was a nice thing to rescue them!"
"It is! For somebody else! If you wanted a cat we could get you whichever you liked from a breeder!"
"I don't want them! They had been left in the parking lot! They would've died there!"
"They could be diseased, you know."
"They're not. I had them checked and vaccinated at the shelter. There's a veterinary clinic right beside it."
"Still, Ben, get rid of them right away. There will be no random abandoned strays in my house."
Bold words, calling it your house, when you're never in it yourself.
She left the dining room in a huff, mumbling exasperatedly to herself.
Left alone, Ben made a decision. Sure, it was driven by hurt and anger, but he would do it anyways. She hadn't come to his graduation, had she? She hadn't listened to him. Why should he listen to her?
For the first time in his life, Ben Gross was going to disobey his parents. He was going to keep those damn cats.
Ben woke up the next morning to the sounds of two kittens rolling around and yawning in a box, and realised he was a bit conflicted - taking care of a whole live animal was no joke, especially since he couldn't ask for help from Patty and his dad.
Hiding them from mom isn't really a problem.
The thought of his mother brought back some of the rage he had felt the night before.
He was keeping those kittens, for sure, but for now, he didn't know where to start.
After an hour of research, Ben had a list and a day full of errands to run.
Why are there so many litter box varieties in this world?
Ben had never known such confusion in his entire life. He was the class valedictorian, had won multiple awards and first place prizes, had gotten into a freaking ivy league, and yet had never faced something so difficult.
In front of him were five tub-like containers - each of a different colour, shape and size. One of them had a transparent lid, another one had a coloured lid, one of them had all these little knobs and buttons on the side, another one had a tag that said 'CAUTION : Be careful of electric wires'
He had angrily told the salesman to leave him alone after the idiot had attempted to sell him seeds for a parakeet, and now he had no one to ask for help.
Or maybe not.
He whipped out his phone and dialled a number.
Ben was regretting his choice.
Paxton had been standing beside him for the past five minutes, brow furrowed and completely silent.
Ben had suddenly realised that he did, indeed, have friends, friends he could ask for help. Only, his friend seemed even more lost and confused than he was.
"I- Wait, does that one say be careful of wires? I thought litter boxes didn't need electricity!"
"So did I! That's why I called you for help!"
"Me? What would I know about this? I've never had a pet!"
"But then why did you agree to help me?"
"Dude, I thought the box was too heavy for you to carry!"
"What's too heavy to carry?"
Trent had showed up out of nowhere, but Ben was somewhat used to him appearing out of thin air.
"Nothing. We can't figure out what to do here, which one of these litter boxes should I buy?
Trent looked at him with confusion. "Bro, you know these are for, like, cats, right? You can't use them."
Ben closed his eyes while Paxton held in a laugh.
"Yes, Trent, I know. I have two kittens at home. This is for them."
"Oh!" Trent said, rolling up his sleeves "Well, none of this fancy shit. What you need is a smart, durable, and simple solution" Spinning around, he called out - "Yo, does anyone here know where the Paw-fect range is?"
A girl in an apron appeared in the aisle, gesturing at them to follow her. She lead them to a different part of the store - a section that seemed entirely dedicated to the company Paw-fect.
An hour later, they were walking out to Ben's car with three large shopping bags.
"Dude, how do you know all this stuff? I mean, you basically told us what varieties of cats there are based on hair length. Where did you find that out?" Paxton asked Trent, not being able to place when precisely Trent had become an expert on cats.
"I spend a lot of time watching commercials on youtube, bro. I know exactly how to look after bunnies and dogs too."
Ben smiled to himself, getting inside the car. He rolled down the window and bid his friends goodbye before driving off towards home.
A month had passed since that fateful day when he discovered his two beloved pets in that parking lot. Now, a month into the summer, he felt he had become somewhat of an expert cat dad. Well, enough of an expert to be worthy of a 'Best Cat Dad in the World' mug, the purchase and use of which had earned him some inquisitve glances from his father, but no questions.
He had hidden the kittens away inside his room, making sure to keep it locked at all times.
So far he was managing spectacularly. He had told Patty that he would clean his own room from now on, in preparation for college, and she had not discovered the kittens yet. To his dad he had said that the same shelter they had visited on graduation day had found an empty spot and accepted them.
He had developed a routine - everyday when Patty went out for grocery shopping, he would empty the litter boxes, fill up water and cat feed in the dispensers and brush their fur. He had installed a lock on his door, and made sure to leave it locked whenever he went out.
So far, so good. Nobody knew - not his dad, not Patty, and definitely not his mom, who had only been in the house for two days in the entire span.
The doorbell rang, telling him that Paxton and Trent had arrived to meet the cats.
"Oh, welcome! Ben is upstairs!" he heard Patty tell them.
Footsteps got louder and louder till Trent finally burst through his door.
"Where are they? Where are my nieces?"
"Trent, dude, not so loud man!" Ben warned, but he couldn't stop the smile from coming onto his face.
When he had found them, the two kittens had been on the verge of death. Thin and sickly, with dull fur, they barely had any energy at all, and would stay lying around and yawning all day long. Now, Ben had nursed them back to health, and they were happily climbing up their scratching post.
The only complaint he had was how aloof they stayed all the time. They made absolutely no efforts to return his affection and made no effort to get close to him, and bolted any time he tried to pet them.
He would call them ungrateful, but they weren't humans after all. Perhaps this was just how cats behaved.
"So, what are their names?"
Ben looked at Paxton for a moment before realising - he hadn't named them yet.
"You haven't thought of names yet, have you?"
"Uh, no."
"We'll help."
They both sat down on his bed and began gazing at the cats carefully.
This went on for some time. Just before Ben was about to interrupt, Trent finally spoke up.
"The white one is Taylor and the ginger one is Sadie."
On recieving confused looks, he explained further "She reminds me of Taylor Swift and she reminds me of Sadie Sink. Name your kids after great people and they shall become great themselves."
Before Ben could say anything in reply, the cats noticed that they had visitors in the room and bounded towards Trent. Jumping onto him, they began licking his face.
"Hey! They like the names!"
"Well," Ben said, smiling "Taylor and Sadie it is."
The very next morning they had little silver collars with Taylor and Sadie engraved on them, hanging around their necks.
Ben stood as if ready to tackle, glaring at the white kitten. Taylor glared back - no one would make her take a bath if she did not want to take a bath.
A moment more of glaring, and Ben jumped onto her. Taylor let out a yowl and shot off towards the bed.
"Come back here, you little rascal! Don't get my bed all muddy!"
But Taylor refused to listen. Jumping on the bed, she left her muddy footprints all over the white sheets.
Ben had accidently left the window cracked open the previous day, and the more mischiveous one of his cats had taken the opportunity to escape out into the rain-filled muddy backyard. Ben had been trying to get her to take a bath in his tub ever since, but getting a cat near water was proving to be more difficult than imagined.
"You were fine with soaking around in the rain yesterday - what's the problem with my tub? It's still water!" he exclaimed as she attempted to run away from between his legs.
She was not succesful, however, for in that second Ben bent over and caught her.
She growled again as he held up her little kicking and squirming frame in victory.
That very moment, the door opened, revealing Patty on the other side.
Ben gulped - he had forgotten to lock the door.
"I can explain-" he began, but he was cut short.
"Oh little prince, did you really think you could keep a cat in this house for two whole months without telling me? Who do you think kept them clean this whole time? Come one, hand them over, I will give them both a bath."
Shocked, Ben handed Taylor over to her.
"Does-does Dad know?"
"Of course! He really liked your 'Best Cat Dad Ever' mug."
As Patty took the kittens away, Ben smiled to himself. So his dad did know him well enough to know his secrets after all.
The news had put a damper in an otherwise splendid morning.
Ben had grown out of wanting his mother to return home. Now, he didn't feel anything but frustration when she was around, didn't wish for anything but for her to leave. It was better when she was away.
But that morning Patty had told him that she would be returning home for a whole week.
Way to ruin a boy's day.
He was shuffling about his room, reluctantly trying to find his jacket so he could go out and buy something nice for his mother.
Ever since the reveal that both Patty and his father were well aware of his pets, Ben had let them run free in the house. The very first day the two had run across the hall while he was they were eating breakfast, and his father had simply smiled in response.
Now he headed downstairs, calling out to them, but neither of them appeared.
Shrugging it off, he left for the grocery store. A box of chocolates would do nicely, he thought.
Ben returned home to chaos.
His mother was apprently screaming at someone in the living room.
As he got closer, he could make out the words more clearly.
"How could you let those...those creatures stay in our house Howard? He picked them off the street!"
Of course, the very first thing she did after returning home was berating his pets. Anger bubbled up inside him, but he pushed it back down and entered the room smiling. His father was sitting on the couch, massaging his temples, while Vivian stood in front of him.
"Mom, you're back! I got you chocolates." he said, trying his best to fake happiness, holding out the box.
His mom didn't take it, and instead crossed her arms and glared at him.
"Ben, I told you to get rid of those cats."
"You did."
"But you didn't listen to me! They were in my house! I went to the fridge to get myself water and I found them rolling around on the kitchen floor!"
Ben paused for a moment.
"I wanted to keep them."
"I don't care! I told you to get rid of them! You have to listen to me, I AM YOUR MOTHER!"
Well, it's not like you ever behave like a mother.
"What did you just say?"
Did I say that out loud?
"What did you just say, you ungrateful brat?"
That was what did it. Something inside Ben's chest shattered into pieces. His eyes filled up with tears as he stared straight at his mother, having waited far too long to say what he needed to be said.
"I SAID, you never behave like a mother! You didn't show up to your only son's graduation ceremony, you didn't know that I got admitted into a ivy league, hell , you didn't even know who my girlfriend was! THAT IS NOT HOW MOTHERS BEHAVE! If only you actually had time left for me after all your retreats and spas and treatments, maybe you would realise you know nothing about me!"
Ben did not wait to find out her reaction. He did not turn around to face his dad who was calling his name. He did not look at Patty. He simply bolted up the stairs to his own room.
Locking the door, he jumped onto his bed with shoes still on, and buried himself under the covers. Trying his best to not let the tears fall, he tried to call his cats.
"Taylor? Sadie? Are you there? Taylor?"
Not one peep. They weren't here either.
For the first time in a long time, Ben felt absolutely alone. He had his dad, he had his friends, but he had never had a mom. She was right there, down the stairs, the woman who had given birth to him, but he had never had a mom. And for whatever reason, that was enough to make him feel the way he did.
He lay quietly for some time, not letting a single tear or a single sound escape. He refused to cry.
Suddenly, he felt something weighing down the bed beside him.
Taylor and Sadie both made their way underneath the blanket, finally lying down right beside Ben.
He turned to his side and tried to pat Taylor's fur. He gently touched her with his hand, afraid that she would run away any moment.
But she didn't. Instead, she let out a content purr and curled up into an even smaller ball of fur.
They were here. They were here with him.
He could not hold back the tears any more. But even through the sobs, he began to smile.
"Take good care of them Patty!" Ben called to his housekeeper as he hugged both of his cats one last time.
"I'll be back for Thanksgiving and Christmas, alright?"
He finally got up to leave when Patty began hounding him about being late to the airport.
He got into the passenger seat beside his dad.
His mom hadn't spoken to him since his outburst that day. He had tried to get a hold of her, but had always come out empty handed.
Still, having let all of it out had left him feeling lighter than ever. This time, he noticed, he didn't really care about his mother's absence.
"I left all the instructions for food and water on a checklist on my desk. Vet visits every month, and -"
"Ben, relax, we got this. You're going to college, be excited."
Ben smiled and looked out the window one last time as the car started, at the two little fur balls that he had come across by accident, who had ended up claiming rather large pieces of his heart.
What's more, they had ended up healing large parts of it as well.
"Yeah, I'm so excited." he said, looking at the road ahead.
Author's Note : I am so sorry for being SO LATE, but I have an excuse - I kept deleting and re-writing over and over again because this is the first time I'm showing something I've written to someone else. I'll be doing the other two prompts over the next two days as well.
Well, this ended up being sappier than I had thought earlier! Anyways, I always appreciate constructive criticism, but please be kind.
Thank you for reading!

submitted by AccomplishedKale795 to Neverhaveievertvshow [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:59 jelllymoose Guys will leave you in terrible situations and it is really up to us to take care of each other

I’m a bartender at a pub and last night a couple comes in, they appear totally sober, each have just a beer and a shot. They go sit at a table and 30 min go by and I look over and she’s falling on the floor. Man is yelling at her and getting an Uber. He disappears and me and and a customer (woman) help this lady outside to sit on a bench thinking he will be out there and help her in the car. Nope. I watch as he leaves in the Uber himself. Now she is someone else’s problem. She’s fucked around with her phone so much she’s locked out of it for hours.
She is obviously blacked out and going from laughing to crying, the only information I could get is that she is from another state and he flew her out here, she doesn’t know anyone and doesn’t have any money. I get her water and food and put her on the couch in the back so she can hopefully sober up and I can close the place down.
She runs out of the back at one point and runs out the front and into the street. I literally had to run at full speed to catch up to her and tell her she’s either leaving in a taxi or in a cop car. Finally convince her to come back inside. I was planning on just taking her to a hotel myself because I felt uncomfortable having a stranger drive her at this point. But my boss sees this happening on the cameras and tells me she needs to leave before I lock the doors. So I convince her to take a cab but the only place she will go is back to the man’s house who left her at the bar.
I tell the cab driver to please make sure she gets inside somewhere and text me when it’s done. He texts me telling me she’s back inside but he didn’t get paid. I feel bad for him, I feel bad this lady had no where to go but back to this asshole. I’m angry he just left me to deal with her and I had to stay way later at work than I should have.
This is not a unique story. I’ve had to deal with drunk women getting left by some asshole before. Being drunk in public is one of the most vulnerable situations to be in, and it’s so callous men can just leave you like that without a second thought.
submitted by jelllymoose to TwoXChromosomes [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:52 _uneven_compromise Long feedback & suggestions post after 500 hours

My feedback after ~500hrs, #71 on leaderboards atm. 5k hours in Tarkov if that matters to anyone. :')
1. Queue system changes:
After the queue system changes half of my games are empty, rest of them have 1 or 2 teams. Space combat is completely dead, I either spawn first and see no ships/one ship at the other end of the map or I spawn in late and everyone is in POIs already. I can bring biggest ships solo with no fear of being shot down before I make it into the raid. Having to wait 3-5 minutes to get into a PvE game really ruins it for me.
2. Ship guns opinions and suggestions:
Flak is above everything else after the buff, and the fact that it's on the smallest and cheapest available chassis makes other ships kind of useless (for space combat, disregarding ship stash size). All of the other ship guns are too weak, I'd rather have the default 100mm cannon instead of anything that's not flak, rocket artillery or torpedoes.
- Flak Cannon - Revert range buff, or halve the current range and lower the dmg by 20. With lowered damage (assuming you can hit every shot which is easy with Flak) it would still destroy Scouts and Interceptors with 1 reload, Heavies with 2 and Capitals with 3, but wouldn't kill people inside ships as fast as it does now.
- Dual 25mm - The gun is easy to use, has decent projectile speed, but the reload speed makes it way worse than the default 100mm. Halving the reload speed would double the dps in longer fights, making it have 15 more dps including reload than the rustbucket cannon which I feel would be fair. Buff the reload speed to 3s, or 4 if it turns out to be too strong.
- 75mm turret is the worst ship gun right now. Has 0 AoE even though visually the explosion is quite big, deals no damage, has very slow projectile. Buff it to 100 (or even 125), give it 3m AoE and make the projectile as fast as the 100mm one. It would still have lower overall dps than the 100mm but would have decent consistent dps if you could hit the shots.
- Triple Turret has very good stats, but slow projectile makes it meh compared to other options. Buff the projectile speed so it's the same as 100mm projectile. Maybe reduce the dmg to 200 if it turns out to be too strong.
- Rocket Artillery - The only ship gun that's good without being OP. Leave as it is.
- Dual Rocket - Buff damage to 100, or even 125. Would have overall slightly less dps than 100mm turret, but stronger burst dps.
- Torpedo launcher - A very specific gun that's both OP and useless depending on the situation. It's the only ship gun that can consistently kill people before they get to the pods if they're not spamming large medkits. I'd say leave as it is for meme value, but could be buffed to dual rocket projectile speed with lowered damage. Dual Rockets would need a projectile speed buff then.
- Howitzer - Look how they massacred my boy. It was the most satisfying ship gun in game. Revert the nerf, buff damage back to 250.
- Nuclear Launcher - Good as it is.
I'd also suggest making an actual turret gunner view using the port camera 'overlay' with some basic HUD and a crosshair, locating the view on the top of the gun turret. The camera bugs out with certain guns making it unable to see where you're aiming because the turret model gets in the way, especially on the new ship guns.
Most of the ship guns don't hit exactly where you aim, the biggest culprit being the Strike Frigate. I feel that issue turns many people away from ship combat or running something else than a Rustbucket. Making the guns hit where the crosshair is would be a huge QoL change.
3. Ship customization:
I really don't like that a feature got completely removed from the game. It was fun running/running into weird builds and trying stuff out.
Ship customization could also be the solution to the 'breaching problem' for people who complain about getting breached right at the start of the game - there could be a 'breaching armor' customization option that would reduce the speed of the ship by a decent margin while disallowing being breached before the ship is destroyed. You could be safe from instant breaching at the cost of being an easy target or being the last ship docking into POI.
Could also allow other options - buying lighter armor so your ship is faster with a downside of being destroyed easier, or armor that's weak to certain weapon types (normal projectiles, flak, rockets/torpedoes) and strong vs. others. Would have to be represented visually on the ships in some way. New ship models could be used to represent different modifications, eg. breacher scout model - scout with anti-breaching armor. Or Current ship variants could be sold as different chassis' with the default 100mm cannon with option to upgrade them as before the UA patch.
Some customization could be also balanced by allowing different gun types with certain customizations, eg. light turret guns - 100mm, 75mm, dual 25mm, dual rockets, rocket artillery, maybe flak. Heavy turret guns - Triple turret, howitzer, torpedo launcher, nuclear launcher. If you want to bring a big stash and good armor - you can't use heavy turrets because there isn't enough poweroom in the ship to run it all. Bigger ships could have more room/power to use more customizations at the same time.
Unlocking better ship chassis in shop could be an option, so when you start you can only buy scouts, then you pay to unlock interceptors and so on.
No level requirements, so if someone wants to focus strictly on space combat could just grind the money and buy whatever they want. All of it would also be a money sink to be able to do something with all the money which is very easy to get and would allow to change focus while prestiging - eg. on my first prestige I focus on in-raid stuff, then on the second one on space combat to switch things up a bit.
4. Gameplay issues/suggestions:
- After recent hitreg changes the torso hurtbox while someone is ADSing is too big and covers the head. It requires me to aim at the top of the head to land a shot that's not tanked by arms, which results in the gun covering most of the model so if the opponent crouches or moves I can't see it.
- Breaching spawns, one of the biggest problems for me. I hate dying right after breaching Merchant just because someone spawned right behind me and it feels equally shitty when I get a free kill because I spawned right behind someone. Add a simple check if a player is near a breaching spawn and spawn the next player somewhere else. I understand that sometimes there may be too many players but if that happens less often it wouldn't be as annoying.
- Being able to operate airlock doors manually. It's irritating that I have to go through the locking/unlocking animation just to access the ship stash. Let me leave the door open, use the ship stash then close it. Same goes for airlock camping, I don't really have a problem with that in general, I understand that it might be a 'balance' decision but just sitting there without being able to close the door feels... Illogical? Maybe add a 30s cooldown for the outside door, the current one is way too punishing especially when people camping the airlock still have huge advantage.
- Change the handling of mouse input. No idea why it isn't just raw input, mouse smoothing/acceleration is a bad thing in any FPS game period.
- Make the UI sound slider lower the sounds of picking up stuff/crafting in the inventory, no idea why it's tied to effects volume. Scrapping machetes hurts with high volume on headphones.
- Equipping and throwing grenades could be a bit faster and automatically switching to the last used weapon after throwing one would be a nice QoL feature.
- Fall damage, one of the weirdest things in the game - jumping over the railing on the rustbucket stairs takes 3% of the hp while dropping all the way down from high command on Navy deals maybe 15%. Make the players not take damage when jumping from low height but increase the damage while jumping from bigger heights.
- Crafting time should be reduced to 0 or increased so you have to wait and plan ahead for crafting bigger items. Right now it's just a minor annoyance where I have to alt-tab for 2 minutes while waiting for a ship to craft. If crafting times would be increased allow us to get more crafting slots in some way. I'd rather have instant crafting though because the fact that preparing for a game is super fast compared to other games in the genre is a definite plus.
- Adding a compass. A simple addition that would help with teamplay, especially in space combat to help with pilot and gunner coordination.
- Add situational spawn triggers? I know AI isn't much of a problem in this game and is probably worked on, but having AI spawn while doing certain things on map like opening a Vault/Depot, accesing some areas (High Command) would be a cool thing. But maybe I'm biased because my games are very empty lately.
- Stash management - It would be nice to be able to CTRL click items both ways, but I guess it's going to be polished out later after adding content and more core stuff into the game.
5. Guns balance suggestions/opinions:
- Bring back the AP mine oneshot and disable the red light. They're hard to get and there's not many situations where it's guaranteed someone will walk into one. Make them deal decent damage to the ship if detonated onboard or make the breaching destroy them before the player spawns.
- Buff Viper. It's a rare weapon that's really cool, but the only way to kill someone with a Sten is to land headshots and Viper doesn't allow you to do it easily. Allow us to put Sten attachments on them at least.
- Buff shotgun spread, the recent change ruined them completely. Revert the change, I know adsing to reduce spread isn't realistic but is a decent solution for them to not suck and be usable at the same time without people running and gunning with the all the time.
- Make the body of the M16 scope smaller, it covers too much of the screen to be usable. The reticle could also be smaller. SVT scope sensitivity issue is probably known to the devs already so I'm hoping it will be fixed too.
6. ZTH:
Unpopular opinion, but ZTH is ok as it is. I was also pissed off at the POIs not appearing, SAS Captains/Commando Majors not spawning and other RNG things, but it's the only long-term goal along trader levels in the game right now so not being able to rush through it is fine by me. I switched to just playing the game regardless of having ZTH targets on the map and doing them if I get blessed by the RNG gods.
7. POIs and suggestion about getting the POI that you want:
Terraformer and Prison are both great maps that are mostly ignored by the players. I'm afraid that after adding soloqueue they will be even emptier because the playerbase will be divided into 2 parts.
What if players were able to unlock and craft coordinates that allow to get into a specific POI - You could find disk drives/CDs/floppy discs/whatever in the computers, then pay a large amount of money to allow one time entry to a specific POI. I know that Asteroid Mine would probably be full every raid, but if some people would want to have a calm raid they would select Prison or Terra, and if enough people decide to do that sudeenly you got a raid with some people and action in it. Also less players would leave just because they didn't get the POI they want. Would work even better if all raids would be a single POI raid. The idea obviously requires more refinement. There could also be a bonus for going into a raid without coordinates like +10% exp for going random.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk, sorry for any errors, English isn't my primary language.
The game is great, I love how SIG managed to get what's fun about extraction shooters and create a fun and unique experience that's also approachable for a casual player. I hope it'll get as much traction as it deserves and become a success after release.
Also devs hit me up if you need QA help - I got 10 years of QA experience and have some free time right now.
submitted by _uneven_compromise to MaraudersGame [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:33 WideMix8098 Don’t buy a used car in Lawrence, especially from Express Motorsports.

Let me preface by saying yes I am aware that Lawrence is not by any means the best place to buy a used car. However, it was my only choice at the time. I was desperate and forced to get whatever I could. I tried to pick the least sketchy and trustworthy used car dealership to do business with. Don’t buy from these people. Don’t even think about it. I bought a 2008 Honda CRV for 8,000 from them in January, and by March the dashboard lit up with engine codes. The engine was completely dead by April, about 90 days after I bought the car. After basically threatening to sue them, they reluctantly agreed to trade for a car of much less value. I eventually decided against trading in fear of getting more problems from them. I sold the car to get not even half of my money back. There is no explanation for dropping a valve randomly after doing nothing but if anything, overly maintaining this car. This was the first car I owned in 2 years and it took a long time to save up this money, doing research and careful planning for nothing and a bad attitude when I came to them with my dead car they sold me. I would stay clear of this place at all costs. This is a warning.
Here is the copy of the timeline I sent to my lawyer:
Hi Kevin,
I bought an 08 Honda Crv from Eduardo Contreras at Express Motorsports Dealership in Lawrence, Massachusetts. I’ve done nothing but try to maintain the vehicle and the engine was dead within 2 months of purchasing the car.
Here is a timeline of events.
Jan 10 2023 at 4:30pm Traveled to Lawrence, Massachusetts to look at the vehicle which is a 2008 Honda Crv ex sport utility. Was told the “total loss” on the CarFax was a mistake the insurance company made with only minor front end damage. Was told the title was always clean. After reviewing the CarFax further it appears it had both a salvage and rebuilt title issued then later corrected in “error” then a clean title was issued. Put a $500 deposit down on the vehicle. At the time the dealership had no negative reviews. However on or around the time I bought my vehicle they received many negative reviews similar to mine.
January 12 2023
Bought my insurance policy for the vehicle.
January 17 2023
Was issued a temporary license plate to transport the vehicle from the dealership to my residence.
January 18 2023
Purchased the vehicle for 8,000. Was told the purchasing contract included a 30 day warranty for the entire vehicle. Purchaser contract had no disclosure of being subject to recalls. Tmps light was only light on the dash.
January 20 2023
Registered the vehicle.
February 9th 2023
Vehicle passed state inspection.
Between February 9th and March 15th (can get exact date)
A letter was issued describing multiple airbag recalls dating back to 2016.
March 24 2023
Engine started shifting gears harder. No engine light. Oil life at 60%. Last oil change was preformed 121,500 miles. At 123,800 I preformed an oil change using the same oil that was written on the last oils change sticker. The oil life never increased.
March 26 The airbag light, check engine light, and hazardous conditions light turned on and never turned off. Developed a p303 engine code. Mechanical problems including engine misfire on cylinder 3 and a hard start. Mechanical issues never improved even after a tune up and attempting to fix all possible causes. List of what I spent to try and fix with receipts.
Spark plugs Coil packs Battery Fuel injector Tools Sea foam Oil Mass airflow cleaner Throttle body cleaner
April 3rd
Took vehicle to Honda dealership to replace airbags and have misfire diagnosed. Honda dealership declared engine failure with a dropped valve. Was quoted 3,000 to fix.
Communicated with Eddie the mechanical issues and requested compensation for selling me a dead engine. I asked questions regarding my warranty and discovered I was never given an official warranty in writing. Eddie said “ we have you a 30 day warranty on the engine and transmission only. It is in the purchase contract.” However upon inspection it was not. Asked him about the vehicle being subject to recalls and he denied that it was. This is when I discovered the odd verbiage on the CarFax about a rebuilt title issued in error after an insurance company deemed the car a total loss. Eddie agreed to give me a car of lesser value, then listed said car. Eddie insisted on communicating through voice notes and over the phone and not through text. I was not able to communicate over the phone at that time.
Arranged to trade cars on May 11th, however on Tuesday April 11, my engine started smoking and it is not safe the transport the vehicle back to Massachusetts. Also after reading a negative review about someone in my similar situation trading in a car to him, then later that car wasn’t suitable as well, I decided not to trade in. Id rather have my money back so I can purchase a safe, reliable vehicle than gamble with doing business with him again and trusting his vehicles.
submitted by WideMix8098 to massachusetts [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:32 EdgyMeme196 Is there any legal action I can pursue against probation officers going overboard with searches?

Background: I live in CA with my family in an apartment. My brother is on probation from some troubles a year ago or so, I share a room with him. Almost every time the p.o. comes around to heck for any prohibited items, the entire room is ransacked.
The first visit they asked me (I was home at the time)to point out what my belongings were, which bed was mine, where my clothes were kept, if I had any blades or weapons, etc. They rummaged through my brothers belongings, found nothing of note, told me I was not allowed to keep my box cutter (needed for my job) inside my backpack in the room, and left. But now they seem enraged that they haven't found anything he isn't supposed to have and are searching more aggressively?
My understanding was that his belongings and the direct area around his bed were liable to be searched. This is not the case any more as every cabinet/drawer in the room is left open, belongings are thrown all over the floor, bedsheets are ripped off the beds, toiletries are on the floor, and clean/dirty clothes are left spilling out of the closet. I've had to replace toothbrushes multiple times, had highschool certificates bent from sticking out of drawers when they were closed, and almost lost a check from work during one visit, and am generally miserable about when the next search might be. During one of the earlier visits they also searched the room that we are renting, and asked for access to my parents' room (parents keep it locked, and only they have the key to the door).
In addition to this, they has expressed that they want us to remove the cameras we have installed within the apartment. One if them asked if they were functioning at the moment, we said we needed to update the software, and they replied "okay well, it's not a problem right now because they aren't working. But in the future, if the cameras become an issue, we will ask you to take them down." I fail to understand how having cameras stops them from doing their searches or restricts them in any way?
In my opinion they just want any plausible reason to lock up my brother again, and I want to know if there is any legal options available to protect ourselves?
submitted by EdgyMeme196 to legaladvice [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:29 KillerPacifist1 On the Edge - Part 1

There is a romantic notion that the greatest discoveries in science are heralded not by a grand “Eureka!” but by the humble “Huh, that’s weird”. That minor but unexpected phenomena, when picked at, often unravel well established theories and bring about vast new understandings.
On a spaceship this notion is patently false.
On a spaceship “Huh, that’s weird” is not humble, it is insidious. A best case scenario “Huh, that’s weird” means hours of troubleshooting to confirm beyond all possible doubt that what is “weird” is only a faulty oxygen sensor and not an indication of the incipient failure of the life support system. Even then, one will spend nights awake wondering if they really did catch the problem and that they are not being slowly poisoned by an unnoticed build-up of carbon dioxide. A worst case scenario “Huh, that’s weird” means a dead ship, all hands lost.
“Huh, that’s weird,” said Ensign Mukami.
Captain Omondi’s hands tensed around the handholds.
Her last “Huh, that’s weird” had her technicians spending three days digging through the ship’s cooling conduits before finding a literal rat’s nest of wires and insulation causing an exhaust vent to overheat. They managed to clear the nest out, but several weeks and dozens of improvised traps later the rat itself had yet to be found. How a rat got on her ship in the first place is likely a mystery she will likely never solve and the mere thought of it scurrying around in her walls still gave her nightmares.
She can only hope to be equally lucky this time.
“Care to be more specific, Ensign Mukami?” Captain Omondi asked as she floated up behind the ensign’s terminal.
“Yes, sorry ma’am!” Ensign Mukami snapped to attention. Or at least as much one could in microgravity. She had clearly still been puzzling through the problem when the captain interrupted her focus. Captain Omondi doubted Ensign Mukami even realized she had invoked that ominous phrase and guessed the apology and salute were simply an automatic response to being caught off guard by a superior officer. The Captain did not like surprising those under her command. Surprises are never welcome on spaceships, but she wasn’t at all bothered if this incident contributed to the rumors growing in the lower ranks that she could read minds and predict the future. It was not unhealthy for a superior officer to have an air of mysticism about them.
“Well ma’am, I was about to send our updated positional telemetries when I noticed some… discrepancies.”
“I will ask again, Ensign Mukami. Care to be more specific?” The captain kept her frosty exterior but inwardly she sighed with relief. Strange instrument data was almost always an “hours of obnoxious troubleshooting” situation rather than an “oh god, we’re all going to die” catastrophe. “Well like I said, it started when I noticed a discrepancy between where our internal accelerometers believe we are and where our NUPRT data tells us we are.”
NUPRT, pronounced “nup-ert” and known by those averse to acronyms as Neptune-Uranus-Pluto Radio Triangulation, was the gold standard for deep space navigation. By tuning into the NUPRTs nearly continuous stream of time-stamped radio pulses, any ship operating in deep space could easily and instantaneously have an accurate fix on its position down to the meter. “So there is something wrong with our accelerometers then,” The captain asserted. NUPRT signal data was both vital and easy (i.e. cheap) to detect. This meant any ship worth its salt had at least one redundant NUPRT navigation system double checking the results from the first and to act as backup should the first break down. The Godwit had four, all physically and digitally firewalled from each other. It was inconceivable all should break down simultaneously.
“That’s what I thought too, but then I checked the actual vector coordinates the two systems were providing us.”
Captain Omondi did not like the turn this conversation was taking. What seemed like a potentially straight-forward problem was starting to give her the same crawling feeling she got when she imagined that god damned rat in the walls.
“The accelerometers all tell us that we are on our merry way. That we are heading out of the solar system at two-point-four times the third cosmic velocity. Exactly as we expect.” An uncomfortable strain had entered the ensign’s voice as she started to ramble.
“And the NUPRT data?”
Ensign Mukami gulped. “According to NUPRT, we stopped moving about thirty minutes ago.”
It was such an unexpected thing to hear that the captain just looked dumbly at the Ensign for several seconds before her brain could properly parse the words.
“In our tracks, ma’am. Instantaneous, as far as the instruments can discern.”
“Nonsense,” the captain heard herself say.
No conceivable force could have deaccelerated the Godwit from one hundred kilometers per second in such a manner. Even if God’s own hand had reached through the vacuum to stop their motion, the Captain and the Ensign would not be around to muse upon its divine intervention. They would be too busy being the fine red mist mixed amongst the liquified metal that had once been the Godwit’s hull.
“It is nonsense,” Ensign Mukami agreed with uncharacteristic solemnity, “But our pulsar navigation systems and even an optical planetary triangulation agree with the NUPRT data.”
“Have you shown this to navigation?”
“No sir. I wanted to double check, to make sure I wasn’t… making a mistake”
Or going crazy, the she thought to herself
“Your thoroughness is well appreciated, Ensign. I will bring this to the attention of Officer Kioni personally.”
While Captain Omondi’s conscious mind was still working through the full implications of what it had learned, her instincts told her to maintain control of the narrative until she had a better handle on the situation. The most straightforward conclusion; that three independent, quintuple redundant systems all failed in the same bizarre way, was so improbable it almost more likely that the Godwit had inexplicably come to a dead stop in the vacuum of deep space. A nagging thought crawled up from Omondi’s brain stem and into her conscious mind. If fault and fact were both ruled out, only one plausible alternative remained: sabotage.
Captain Omondi was preparing to call Navigation Officer Kioni and Security Officer Njama to a private meeting when she heard Communications Officer Wambui mumble something to herself.
“Huh, that’s weird...”
“Care to be more specific, Officer?” Captain Omondi asked, feeling a strong sense of dread tinged deja vu as she redirected her path with a handhold and floated to the communications officer’s terminal.
“It appears we have lost connection to the communication tight beam linking us with central command.” Wambui said in her terse, matter of fact way.
Omondi’s heartbeat quickened.
“You caught me in the middle of troubleshooting the situation. I’ll have more information for you in a moment---”
But the captain had already sent the encrypted command for a full system lockdown and Wambui was cut off by a blaring alarm. Within three seconds, the minimum amount of time some safety engineer somewhere had deemed it necessary to clear any doorways or hatches, the entire ship violently compartmentalized.
Within moments the Godwit had ceased to be a ship. It was now dozens of isolated cells separated by vacuum tight, magnetically locked doors so impervious it would be more convenient to breach a wall than try to break through them. Access tunnels, crawlways, and vents were similarly sealed. Each room now responsible for its own life support, with the particularly small and crowded rooms only hours away from carbon dioxide poisoning.
All of this was, of course, standard issue safety procedures in the case of a breach. Any ship incapable of compartmentalization was only one micrometeor away from total pressure loss. An absurd risk to take even for the most foolhardy.
What made Omondi’s lockdown different was it isolated the rooms electronically and locked all service panels. This prevented a would-be saboteur from doing further harm to the ship, physical or digital, but also prevented crew from fixing problems or calling for help.
It also gave Omondi the sole authority to lower the lockdown, and for this she hated it deeply. To have a single point of failure, and for that point of failure to be human, was antithetical to everything the last several hundred years of space travel had taught her people. The fact it was absolutely necessary from a security perspective did nothing to assuage her.
“Listen up people!” Omondi called to her bridge crew. It was unnecessary. Shaken by the ear piercing alarm, slammed doors, and locked terminals, everyone had instinctually looked to her.
“In the last five minutes we have lost both navigation and communication systems. Given the circumstances and timing surrounding their failures, I deemed sabotage to be the most likely culprit and, with the authority vested in me as the captain of the Godwit, I have unilaterally invoked a comprehensive security lockdown and with it assumed absolute control of the ship’s systems. Does anyone dissent my decision or my authority to make it?”
As expected, the room remained deathly silent. This was a formality whose main purpose was to inform her immediate crew members what was going on, confirm her actions were following established protocol, and, most importantly, reassure them that she was still sane. Crew in other compartments would simply need to accept their ignorance and swallow their panic for the time being.
She sent a command and the navigation terminal lit up.
“Officer Kioni, I have temporarily granted you access to your terminal again. Ensign Mukami, please get her up to speed on the problems you identified in our navigation systems. Be warned, the terminal will lock again in ten minutes unless I directly intervene.”
This problem required her to put some trust in her crew, but she did not plan on giving any more than absolutely required. It was another protocol she both agreed with and despised.
She sent a second command and the communications terminal flashed blue.
“Officer Wambui, while Ensign Mukami brings Kioni up to speed, let’s see what we can make of our communications problem.” She continued, louder so everyone on the bridge could hear her. “We have roughly three hours to solve this problem before we start to take asphyxiation casualties in the more cramped segments. We will not let that happen.”
submitted by KillerPacifist1 to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:26 meatheadbran 06 Honda accord

Which fuse is for the rear and front headlights
submitted by meatheadbran to mechanic [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 20:02 DoctorSuperZero Hyperstitious - 7 - Phone Stalking & Gene Swapping

Xan is the world's most dangerous criminal mastermind. He’s also in hiding and completely broke. That’s fine. He’s between master plans. It’s normal to be at rock bottom between master plans. He also forgets stuff and may be trapped in a dream.
Because at night, Xan thinks he’s an old lady, trapped in a dingy apartment, by an angry fellow who wants to kill her. Not her idea of a good time, but she’s keeping an open mind. It is excitingly visceral. Could turn out awesome.
Safe is a sci-fi, progression, comedy. Guaranteed to cause more mental problems than it solves.
First Next
Dark City - Large Apartment Complex
I wake to frailty and a psycho yelling die in my general vicinity.
“We need to figure out how people keep finding us.”
The police haven’t found us.
“That just raises more questions.”
I pour myself a bowl of salty goo and garnish it with spicy peanut butter crunch. It’s pretty fucking good. The psycho rants and raves past the apartment a few times. A little dinner entertainment.
It’s surprising the psycho keeps finding me and the police can’t. Compare their resources. The cops have investigators, eyedrones, and spyware. The psycho has a one word vocabulary and a tendency to stab doors. One organization seems more pursuit capable. And yet here we are.
Not sure how I feel about it. It’s easier to evade the psycho, but safer to get caught by the police. Better to surrender than fight a knife with a spoon. Unless surrendering gets me locked up with a bunch of stabby psychos.
For now, I'd like to avoid everyone. To do that, I need to figure out how the psycho keeps finding me.
“How would you find someone?”
I don’t know. But let’s do it tomorrow. Today you’re going to a doctor.
“Can’t we do both?”
Probably not. You’re only awake two hours a day.
“Fine. How do we find a doctor?”
A web search shows sixtyfour auto-hospitals in the city.
“How many have human doctors on staff?”
I don’t know. It doesn’t say. Probably none. Why?
“We need a human doctor. A decision-bot doc will require my Citizen ID. We’ll just end up in jail.”
We don’t know that. But yes - it is a risk. Can’t we fool decision-bots?
“I don’t think pretending I’m a trashbag will lead to quality care.”
When you say it, I see the problem. We need more information. Unfortunately, the web has very little on auto-hospitals. Or Citizen ID’s. Honestly, everything from the last 100 years looks like it was autoloaded by d-bots. Maybe we should find a human doctor…
Or any human. I gaze out the window. Empty streets and thousands of flying drones. In the Bright City those drones would be spies and weapons. I figure most of these are shipping crunch.
Is everyone asleep? Leaving d-bots to truck along as best they can? That would explain a lot. But is that possible? Can a city run on auto-pilot for 100 years? Volt can’t go ten minutes without fucking up. Then again, neither can I. Maybe human oversight is overrated.
Okay, I found a pixel tracker. We can message a doctor, and when he opens it, the tracker will send us his approximate location.
I freeze. Look at Volt. Psycho fills the silence with a dopplering rage warble.
“Sorry. What?”
A pixel tracker. When you open a picture on the internet, the image isn’t downloaded. It’s just a link. You can send an invisible picture - a transparent one pixel image - and no one needs to know. When they “open” the “image”, their phone asks for the pic. That request contains the phone's location. Or the location of the nearest router or cell tower. Which is usually within a hundred feet of the target. Gets you pretty close.
Psycho howls in our general vicinity.
“Volt. Have you been opening any messages?”
My threat detector monitors all information related to you.
The city’s doomed. “We need to check the settings on your threat detector.”
Sure, but tomorrow. We’re busy today. Also, no doctors are checking their hundred year old emails.
“You have my messages! They will have my Citizen ID!”
Oh! Brilliant! According to your Reddit account, your ID is MuffinMuncher420. Let’s go to the hospital!
Jesus Christ. Goddammit.
I waste an hour trying to dox myself with ancient reddit history, but it’s futile. There’s nothing identifying. Just moldy shitposts from a woman I don’t remember and barely understand. Our past selves are worthless.
Volt gets increasingly agitated as I fail to find myself. She’s ready to roll the dice on an auto-hospital. My health report may be grimmer than she lets on.
“Let’s go to a vet clinic.”
Why? You’re not a pet.
“Vet’s are better than doctors. More versatile. Also, pet’s don’t have Citizen ID’s.” Probably.
Okay. Sounds good.
I gently shoo some bugbots off the holodrone box. “Let’s get you into a new body.”
No! Tomorrow! You’re gonna pass out in like 45 minutes! We gotta go!
Fine. We pack our loot. Slip Volt into my pocket and plod into the night. I assure Volt that we’re strategically stealthy, but I can’t be arsed. Too tired and almost dead. Psycho doesn’t notice anyway. Another cunning escape.
My apathy extends to driving our stolen truck. It’s objectively a bad decision - the police could be watching. But at my age, long walks are also risky. The cops are probably asleep. If their d-bots hassle me I’ll disappear in a trashbag.
We get to the clinic without any drama. The veterinary d-bot is a bed, a multipurpose arm, and a hologram of a dude in a lab coat. Functional and reassuring. I like him. Also, he starts my examination without asking for ID or payment, so that’s good.
He squints at me for a minute. “I don’t treat humans.”
The Dark City d-bots are pretty smart but seem weak at visual identification. “I’m a talking chimp.”
Doc-bot nods. “Cool. Very popular these days. Do you have an ant report?”
After a brief file transfer, the Doc shakes his head. “Well, I see why you love her. Look at this DNA. She’s a classic. But she’s seen better days. On a molecular level, she’s toast. It’s more humane to build a new one. Cheaper too. I’ll fire up the cloner.”
Volt is aghast, but Doc makes some solid points. I’m very tired. “It may be time to let go. Just give me a shot of Super Strong and we’ll skedaddle.”
“No!” Volt snaps. “I love her! Fix her!”
Doc and I share a look. This is awkward. He lays on some bedside manner. “Look, it’s not just her many diseases, these DNA mutations are way past critical mass. Apes naturally get 50 DNA mutations a year, and no mammal can function properly after 3000 or so. That’s when old age hits hard and everything goes at once. That’s what we’re seeing here, except it started a few decades ago.
“Immortalis can heal DNA, by snipping out sections of damaged dominant genes and replacing them with their undamaged recessive partner. But that process is lengthy and physically demanding. In her condition, she’d only die faster.”
I nod reassuringly. “Yep, it’s my time. Just give the Super Strong, and we’ll bounce.”
“Yeah, I’m not giving you Super Strong. It would end you in agony. Also, Super Strong chimps are a terrible idea. You’re bitey little bastards.”
Dammit. Betrayed by my lies. While I contemplate a future without superpowers, Volt tries another tack. “What about other treatments? Could we build her up enough to survive Immortalis?”
Doc chuffs. “I don’t know. Most of her energy is spent feeding tumors. Theoretically, if we slow the cancer, she’d have some resources for other healing. But even Immune B could push her over the edge.”
Doc visibly concentrates. We wait.
“We could smash the tumors mechanically. Blast them with soundwaves. That will free up some energy to fix her general frailty. Freshen up her bone marrow, so she can grow better blood. Some skeleflex wouldn’t hurt either. She’s one good jump from having no knee cartilage.
“With the cancer slowed and the ability to survive a slip and fall, she could live through the week. If she does, a quarter dose of Regen A would revive some muscle tone. If she survives that… I don’t know? Another ant report? See where she’s at?”
He shakes his head slowly. “Lots of ifs here. Many probable points of failure. But it’s the only way I see forward. Even if it works, she won’t be ready for Immortalis for at least a year. It’ll be a photo-finish between drugs and entropy.”
I raise my hand. “Question. Can I have some No Bleed?”
“No. That’s a synthetic blood substitute. We’d have to replace 15% of your blood for it to work. You need all your blood to fix the rest of your body.”
“Cool, but I don’t wanna bleed.”
“Are you bleeding right now?”
“Then fuck off.”
Now that we’re saving me, the bedside manner appears to be turned off.
I lay down and get blasted with targeted ultrasound for the next hour. It’s not exactly painful, but I don’t like it.
“Your body will pass the crushed tumors. You had a fuckload, so expect some weird pee. I won’t say it’s normal - normally you’d be dead - but it’s what’s going to happen.”
“Alright. Why can’t I get any super powers?”
“Most of the super-enhancing drugs are designer endosymbionts. They grow new organelles in each cell of your body. You need to be in amazing shape to survive the process. You also need a vet dumb enough to give a chimp superpowers.”
The future is terrible. Also annoying.
We slip out on the bill and Volt drives us to a new building. It’s a bad idea to let her drive, but I’m wiped, and there’s no one else on the road. We crash in the first empty apartment we find. Utterly beat.
Will the psycho find us? I won’t check any messages.
“I dunno. But I got a plan.”
“Yeah, we’re gonna wake a cop.”
Next Chapter
Pixel Tracking
Cancer Crusher
submitted by DoctorSuperZero to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 19:55 dreckorderek What's up with my car?

We have a 2008 Nissan Versa. I haven't driven it in a few weeks as the tags are expired and we have to register it in a new state(I know, I should have been running it occasionally to keep the battery charged). Now, I went to start it up and the key will not turn at all in the ignition. I made sure the car was in park, then tried wiggling the steering wheel while turning the key and well, now the steering wheel is locked. What's weird is that the key fob and even the lock/unlock buttons on the door are not working. Everything was working perfectly fine the last time we drove it. No electrical/mechanical problems. Am I looking at a dead battery here or something potentially more expensive? Any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks!
submitted by dreckorderek to MechanicAdvice [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 19:53 Ringostarfox Recently home ridden and my cat is driving me insane

So my spinal deformity has recently become so painful I can no longer work, and thus I've been staying home a lot. And my cat has always been pretty talkative, but I was able to make it work because I didn't have to hear it all day. Essentially he was a barn cat, but the volunteer at the adoption center said he'd be able to acclimate to apartment life. That was not the case. He meowed at the front door all day, every day, for two and a half months and I gave in and started letting him outside. Growing up I thought letting cats out was perfectly normal, but about a year and a half later he gets attacked by another cat and he got really badly wounded. This obviously makes me feel like the worst person ever, and since then I've been keeping him inside. Cut to two years after that incident, he's gotten better about not meowing as much, but just the other day my roommate's friends accidentally let him outside (even though they were just hanging out with the cat 10 minutes prior to doing so), and we had to chase him down, and now ever since that day he has been unbearable with his meowing and I am constantly teetering on a meltdown. Basically if he's awake and he's not actively being distracted by a toy or a bird outside the window, he is looking at me and meowing very forcefully. Which can be difficult, especially when I'm trying to record my music or just enjoy a moment of quiet.
I get thoughts that I want to lock him in the bathroom, or start letting him out again. It makes me want to give him away because I might be a danger to him, but at the same time, that also feels really painful because of all the hard work I've put into this, and he clearly loves me. When he's not meowing he's rubbing his face all over me, and licking me, and cuddling up really tight when I can finally get to sleep, and being a playful sweety. But the meowing- or when I do put him in a room- the sound of him tearing at the carpet near the door, is bringing me to my wit's end.
My parent's said they'd be willing to take him, but they're home all the time because they're retired, and I know they think his meowing isn't as big of a problem as it really is. I don't know, any suggestions how to maybe help minimize his behavior so I don't go completely insane?
submitted by Ringostarfox to autism [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 19:50 ConsequencesFree How much would this unmanned convenience store cost to build and operate? Is $30k enough to build?

I am currently in Maryland, USA and I noticed that most liquor stores here and in DC close at 10pm even though their license allows for up to 2am. I would sell other things as well. So I thought up an automated convenience store that functions kind of like a vending machine… but today upon more research, I shouldn’t have been surprised to find out Chinese companies are already doing it but surprisingly they seem to be missing one key piece that mine addresses. Mixing both unmanned retail stores with the vending machine experience. For example an unmanned store in Korea allows people to walk inside the store and shop alone and the payment is automated… that concept requires a lot of faith whereas mine eliminates any possibility of shrinkage/theft.
You browse through the app/website, select your product and pay. You can have it delivered or pick it up. Let’s say you decide to pick it up. You drive up, park, and walk up to the small structure. So imagine a small detached structure similar to those some banks have to access ATMs. You scan your phone, input your code, and the door unlocks, you walk in and it locks. You step up to the glass screen and have the option to add more products to your order. The lobby is very small. If you need help, you can press help and a customer service representative will assist you via audio. There are cameras inside and outside the structure. For sensitive products such as alcohol, this representative will confirm your ID/age. You complete the checkout and your order is dispensed similar to a vending machine. You pick it up, unlock the door and leave.
So the whole building is very small, maybe the size of a US walk-in closet. Merchandise is stored underground, 1-2 stories, in box containers and brought up automatically. These structures would be either next to shopping centers/strip malls or next to neighborhoods. Ideally it can hold 100 different products, and about 3,000 items. The size of store could be bigger, like the size of a 7-11 or bigger. Also the number of products depends on item size and the structure size. There will be a person who loads inventory when trucks arrive, daily or weekly.
Business model
Either charge a $5.99 convenience fee per order or a $19.99 monthly membership fee.
$14.99 delivery fee. Most, if not all of that money goes to the driver.
Charge delivery service companies such as Uber and Doordash a fee to use the platform. $1,000 per month, plus 20% revenue split on whatever they charge customers for delivery.
Charge CPG companies $500 per item, per location slotting fees when legal, plus 10% sales fee. This is meant to keep prices down. So if product X sells for $100, we get $10, while the company gets $90.
My target customers could be anyone with weird work schedules, family’s, and people inconvenienced by early store closures. One example is, say you get off at midnight, almost every retail store will be closed. But you can do your shopping on your way out of work, and pick up your goods before heading home. Or you could place and order and pick it up early in the morning, say 5am. Another example is people who want to drink but don’t want to go out to bars now that liquor stores are closed. Or people needing over the counter medicine for things such as a cold that’s keeping you up, etc.
My big problem is I don’t know how much it would cost to build this out. Ideally, I would want it under $50,000, preferably closer to $30k all in. And yea I know the liquor license and having over the counter medication and maybe even weed would come with their own challenges, regulations, and headaches but I think the trade off is worth it. I can easily see a scenario where each location clears $1,000,000 annually with say a 70% margin.
What do you guys think?
submitted by ConsequencesFree to Entrepreneur [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 19:49 Particular_Typical August locks - 2 locks, same airbnb, different codes. Workaround?

Hi all,
Like the title says, we've got a properties with two August locks each, one on the front door and one on the back door. August is integrated with Airbnb to send each guest a unique code. Unfortunately it sends a unique code for each door and this causes confusion and problems. I'd like it to set the same code for both doors. Has anyone found a way to make this happen? Is there a third party platform or anything?
submitted by Particular_Typical to airbnb_hosts [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 19:25 ShahinMalik [SP] Viewer Analytics

Rodney was awakened by the ringing of his cell phone. He had set a special ring tone for Peter just for that purpose, knowing that when his colleague called, it would not stop ringing until he answered. “Morning, K,” he muttered as he slowly crawled out of bed.
“Rod, you need to get over here right away!” Peter said in a shaky voice. Rodney chuckled absentmindedly, “What did you screw up this time?”
“I just made us rich, that’s what I did!” Rodney’s face straightened, “Are you serious?”
“I’m about to post a Twitlonger, that’s how serious I am, Rod. Now get the fuck over here before I do.”
Sami arrived at the research lab early in the morning. She was told that the video department liked to start the days early, but the door seemed to be locked. She tried knocking, but with two coffee cups in each hand, the effort seemed as futile as it was embarrassing. She was about to gently tap her foot on the door when Rodney came around the corner.
“What are you doing?”
Startled, Sami turned around, “Oh! Dr Craig. Er, good morning!”
“Were you just trying to kick the door in? You know we have cameras, right?”
Sami smiled nervously, “No, why would… I was trying to get in-”
Rodney cut her off, “I’m just messing with you. It’s Sami, right?”, Sami answered with a shy nod.
As Sami and Rodney came walking through the door, Peter was sitting behind his laptop.
“Finally!” he shouted without taking his eyes off the screen, “Hey Rod, remember those new parameters we talked about last Friday? Guess what!”
“K, this is Sami.”
Peter turned around in his chair and looked at Sami in confusion. “Who is this?”
“I literally just told you. What were you saying about the parameters?”
“I’m the new intern,” Sami interjected with the friendliest voice possible.
Peter smiled, “Oh yeah, you’re the influencer!”
“Yes… Well, no, actually. I used to be a content creator on TikTok, not an influencer. But I guess it’s similar.”
“How did that work out for you?”
Sami alternated between staring at Peter and Rodney with a forced smile before breaking the awkward silence, “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Dr. Kaymak.”
“Dr. Kaymak is my wife, call me K,” Peter said with a rehearsed smile and reached out for a conciliatory handshake, but Sami still held the cups.
“Oh, sorry! I brought coffee, where should I…” The two scientists each grabbed a cup from Sami’s hands.
“I’m Rod, by the way,” Rodney muttered in Sami’s direction, “What about the new parameters, K? Did you make any progress?”
Peter turned back to his laptop and gestured at it, “Oh, I made progress, alright! I had the program run through the routine again before leaving last Friday night. It was supposed to create the videos and all the metadata, post them one at a time, and delete them once it had retrieved the analytics data. Only it didn’t do that.”
“So it didn’t work?” Rodney asked impatiently.
“Well let me finish… So far we trained the model on the first four hours of viewing data, so any autonomous adjustments it makes in subsequent runs will be optimized for that time frame. But since you designed the AI to continue training on any data that YouTube feeds back to it, I decided to give the program some leeway. If the AI module determines that there is more relevant data to collect, the process doesn’t automatically stop and the video isn’t deleted.”
“That still sounds like a bug to me.” Rodney interrupted again. Feeling smug, he took a sip of his coffee and jumped abruptly. “This is very cold,” he said to Sami, pointing at his cup.
Sami shook her head nervously, “I waited outside the door for 15 minutes!”
“You could have knocked, I’ve been in here for hours,” Peter said as he typed on his laptop.
Rodney laughed, “Pete, be glad it’s just cold coffee, she almost vandalized our door."
Sami took a nervous sip and winced as well.
Peter looked at her confused for a second before regaining his composure, “Can we focus here? This is big news!”
“Well, so far you’ve only given me your Twitlonger speech. If you don’t mind, I’d like to hear more about the ‘making us rich’ part.”
“Me too,” Sami added confusedly, followed by “Sorry” as she tried to disappear into the background.
Peter inhaled tensely and took another nonchalant look at his screen before turning back to face Rodney. “Well, basically what happened is that we accidentally cracked YouTube’s algorithm. Initially, just one video was uploaded and it went viral immediately. It got 7 million views in 8 hours before our test channel was shut down by YouTube.
“You’re joking.” Rodney looked at Peter incredulously.
“I’m not. 63% of the views were from within the US.”
“Holy shit!” Rodney instinctively began to strut around Peter’s desk. “Okay, but that was a coincidence, right?”
“Well, after my program detected that the channel had been terminated, it created a new one and uploaded the second video, which got 49 million views before YouTube killed it again.”
Rodney stared at Peter with a dull face, trying to process the number he just heard.
Peter continued, “Our channels get deleted for spam quite often. I saw the first email notification on Saturday night but didn’t think much of it. Then I got the second one on Sunday morning.”
“Are you telling me that one of our test videos was seen by more people than the super bowl?”
“He doesn’t watch much sports,” Peter laughed, directing his words at Sami. “But yes, a lot of people saw our test video. I had no idea this was even possible. When I saw the emails from YouTube, I figured something about the new parameters must be messing with the anti-spam routine, so I came in on Sunday to fix it. But it wasn’t a spam problem. I think the spike in views must have triggered YouTube’s fraud detection. They probably thought we were using bots to increase the number of views on the videos, which we weren't obviously.
“Huh, that’s new.”
“Yes, exactly. Now get this! When I realized what was happening, I wanted to try to reduce the effectiveness of the program, but adjusting the parameters only reduced the views back to normal, so in that sense, I guess it actually was a fluke. I decided to try switching back to older training data, and that actually helped a lot. Since then, each new video has been getting a steady 140,000 views every two hours before dipping after about 12 hours. The newest channel is still up with several videos. Retention is still pretty abysmal and the comments section is a mess. I guess millions of users were just as confused as we were when they clicked on the thumbnails. But regardless, imagine what someone with real creative talent could do with this kind of exposure. Imagine what they would pay for it!”
Rodney started to walk in small circles again. “Holy shit, K! I mean, if we do this right… if there is a smart way to monetize this, then… holy shit!”
“We did it, Rod. We’re going to make so much money on this,” Peter said, ending Rodney’s train of thought, “But we gotta be really smart about it. YouTube can’t know what we’re up to! Besides-”
“What are the videos about?” Sami asked.
“What?” Peter and Rodney answered in unison.
“I mean, what kind of video gets 50 million views in a few hours? What was it about?”
Surprised by such a badly timed, totally unimportant question, Peter glanced over to an absent-minded Rodney, “Um. I don’t know, I’d have to look it up. But it doesn’t really matter, the parameters can be applied to any topic. We use politics and gaming as our main categories because they tend to get more engagement on YouTube.”
“Wait, you didn’t watch the videos?” Sami wasn’t sure if Peter was just too caught up in the technical side of things, but Peter and Rodney looked at each other completely unfazed.
“Sami, no offense, but given your ‘professional’ background, you of all people should appreciate what we just accomplished. I’ve watched some of the videos. But the point is that this process can be used for any kind of genre with just minor adjustments to the training data.”
“Of course! I think your program is incredible. Um, I’m just a little concerned about the potential damage such a tool could do in the wrong hands. Right?”
Amused by Sami’s unexpected spark of virtue, Peter shrugged. “You mean like in the hands of a social media influencer?”
submitted by ShahinMalik to shortstories [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 18:49 two_under_three Is it rude to lock door and post a sign of rules for my room as an adult living at home for free? Like is it too much to ask for peace n quiet?!

Is it rude to lock door, make rules for my room, and post them at the door so people get the hint?? I’ve tried politely to bring up such simple requests but they keep getting ignored and I’m tired of having no personal space for peace n quiet.
We are adult children who have kids and so are living with his parents for free: because of this I’m worried I have no say and have to suck up being miserable with no privacy or respect of personal space and boundaries. Worried MIL will get offended and butt hurt about enforcing some sembalancr this way, but she not her child get the hint.
We are tired of constant banging on door, barging in unannounced without an invite, and leaving door ajar for our toddler to run out down the hall, tired of the door being left open also because their gross untrained indoooutdoor animals come in and are a liability around our toddler and just make the carpet gross. Overall, the traffic of people shouldn’t be happening as much as it does as there is also fear they could see something th shouldn’t! MILand her middle school daughter come in constantly uninvited/unannounced. I’ve been seen naked and they claim they don’t care but I do!! Some privacy every now n then please.
They come in and make messes constantly. They keep banging on door and even open the window to unlock the door if it’s locked. If it’s unlocked they will just storm in before anyone even answers. We will be locking the door and barricading the window so no one can open it to unlock it. I am tired of the shenanigans. And when they storm in usually hyping up the toddler, making him sqwuak and then disciplining him for squeaking at them because their energy is loud and not calm. I cannot get my toddler nor infant baby on a decent sleep schedule because of them constantly coming in: even when they try to be quiet they cause a headache.
I will be putting a sign on the door saying “Welcome, please knock first + wait for answer, remove shoes + leave at door, enter slowly/quietly/calmly, sorry no animals allowed.” I love them but they are annoying and can’t wait to move. I’m just wondering if this is too much (too passive aggressive), will cause problems, and or be futile or if I even care because enough is enough.
Has anyone been in this type of boat before and any thoughts?
submitted by two_under_three to AdultChildren [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 18:48 two_under_three Is it rude to lock door and post a sign of rules for my room as an adult living at home for free? Like is it too much to ask for peace n quiet?!

Is it rude to lock door, make rules for my room, and post them at the door so people get the hint? I’ve tried politely to bring up such simple requests but they keep getting ignored and I’m tired of having no personal space for peace n quiet.
We are adult children who have kids and so tried living with his parents for free to save up some money. We will be moving back out soon. Because of this, I’m worried I have no say and have to suck up being miserable with no privacy or respect of personal space/boundaries. It feels a little degrading but I can see the whole beggars can’t be choosers side of the situation.
Worried MIL will get offended and butt hurt but we are tired of constant banging on door, barging in unannounced without an invite, and leaving door ajar for our toddler to run out down the hall. Also tired of the door being left open also because her gross untrained indoooutdoor animals come in and not only are a liability around our toddler (they’re nippy), but they just make the carpet gross. MIL and her daughter come in constantly uninvited/unannounced- they knock (bang on door) and just barge in before we can answer. They love talking and are always really noisy, which whatever- there’s a time and place though (sometimes we just want to chill alone or have quiet time). They’ve barged in and seen both me and my bf naked after a shower on several occasions. We have both politely asked them to knock and wait for answer first but they claim they don’t care (not the point; I do). We would just like some privacy every now n then and for a locked door to mean do not pry it open to try to get in: but to just go away. Bf agrees because they’ve almost walked in on us before too (again, despite us locking door they’ve pried it open which is infuriating).
We are tired of the shenanigans. And when they storm in they are usually hyping up the toddler, making him sqwuak and then disciplining him for him squeaking at them because their energy is loud and not calm. If they just weren’t in here in the first place there would be no need to get the kid hyped and throwing a tantrum. I cannot get my toddler nor infant baby on a decent sleep schedule because of them constantly coming in: even when they try to be quiet they cause a headache. I try not to be rude about it but I draw the line when they discipline our toddler for being a certain way they caused him to be.
Anyway with all that being said I’m thinking of putting a sign on the door saying “Welcome, please knock first + wait for answer, remove shoes + leave at door, enter slowly/quietly/calmly, sorry no animals allowed” so hopefully they get the hint. Is this rude and will it cause problems though?
submitted by two_under_three to Advice [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 18:45 two_under_three Is it rude to lock door and post a sign of rules for my room as an adult living at home for free? Like, is it too much to ask for peace n quiet?!

Is it rude to lock door, make rules for my room, and post them at the door so people get the hint? I’ve tried politely to bring up such simple requests but they keep getting ignored and I’m tired of having no personal space for peace n quiet.
We are adult children who have kids and so tried living with his parents for free to save up some money. We will be moving back out soon. Because of this, I’m worried I have no say and have to suck up being miserable with no privacy or respect of personal space/boundaries. It feels a little degrading but I can see the whole beggars can’t be choosers side of the situation.
Worried MIL will get offended and butt hurt but we are tired of constant banging on door, barging in unannounced without an invite, and leaving door ajar for our toddler to run out down the hall. Also tired of the door being left open also because her gross untrained indoooutdoor animals come in and not only are a liability around our toddler (they’re nippy), but they just make the carpet gross. MIL and her daughter come in constantly uninvited/unannounced- they knock (bang on door) and just barge in before we can answer. They love talking and are always really noisy, which whatever- there’s a time and place though (sometimes we just want to chill alone or have quiet time). They’ve barged in and seen both me and my bf naked after a shower on several occasions. We have both politely asked them to knock and wait for answer first but they claim they don’t care (not the point; I do). We would just like some privacy every now n then and for a locked door to mean do not pry it open to try to get in: but to just go away. Bf agrees because they’ve almost walked in on us before too (again, despite us locking door they’ve pried it open which is infuriating).
We are tired of the shenanigans. And when they storm in they are usually hyping up the toddler, making him sqwuak and then disciplining him for him squeaking at them because their energy is loud and not calm. If they just weren’t in here in the first place there would be no need to get the kid hyped and throwing a tantrum. I cannot get my toddler nor infant baby on a decent sleep schedule because of them constantly coming in: even when they try to be quiet they cause a headache. I try not to be rude about it but I draw the line when they discipline our toddler for being a certain way they caused him to be.
Anyway with all that being said I’m thinking of putting a sign on the door saying “Welcome, please knock first + wait for answer, remove shoes + leave at door, enter slowly/quietly/calmly, sorry no animals allowed” so hopefully they get the hint. Is this rude and will it cause problems though?
submitted by two_under_three to FamilyIssues [link] [comments]

2023.06.02 18:42 Unique-Poem-1490 EX BF Threw My Phone During Argument

I'm making this post mainly just looking for a hopefully unbiased opinion. This post is going to be a LONG one so I put a TL;DR at the end.
I was with my ex (25m) the other day and we had an explosive argument. I'll give a little bit of backstory. He was moving apartments and needed me to help him move. I expressed to him that I really didn't want to help but he told me I needed to because he had nobody else to help him move. I agreed. We picked up a trailer and we were driving to load it when he got cut off. He driver that cut him off flipped off my ex and so my ex sped up, cut in front of him and jammed on the brakes. We did not get into an accident, I feel that's important to mention. My ex and the other guy started arguing back and forth through open car windows about fighting and whatever. Then my ex pulls out a knife from the glovebox and starts threatening to slit the guys throat. Then we pull up to a stop light and they're arguing back and forth and eventually they come to an agreement and laugh it off and leave on good terms. My ex hands me the knife and tells me to put it back in the glovebox. I made some kind of comment like "Oh I'm glad you two made peace and came to good terms" but I said it very sarcastically. I was very upset by the whole ordeal and extremely embarrassed as well. We got into a further dispute about the GPS and destination we were supposed to be going to and I lost my patience and started snapping and raising my voice at him. I was very irritated at this point.
Finally we got to the storage locker but quickly realized that we didn't have the key to the storage locker. He asked me if I had it and I told him no because I didn't. He immediately started full on yelling at me because he said that he told me to grab it when we were back at his place. The thing is though, I don't remember him ever telling me to grab the key. He yelled at me saying that I was on my phone (which was true) and that I was ignoring him while being on my phone. I disagree because I heard the other things he was saying at that time like to grab other things, but I don't remember the comment about the key. So we got back into the vehicle to head back to his place to pick up the key. On the way back he calls his buddy and says "Can you come and help me move some furniture because (my name) forgot the fucking key because she was on her fucking phone". He made other comments about how I supposedly did it on purpose and how I don't care because it's not my gas or my car. I don't remember exactly what he said to his friend because I've blocked most of his comments out but they were very degrading.
Finally we got back to the storage locker with the key. We were both already extremely irritated by the time we started moving furniture. I was making extremely sarcastic comments throughout the whole process however I was still helping him move the furniture and getting it loaded. He got frustrated and went to sit in the truck while leaving me standing there. I gave him a few moments then asked if we could get a move on as it was starting to get late and I had to work early in the morning. He told me no and "this is how it feels when you're on your phone ignoring me". He came back after a while, we moved some stuff, he got frustrated again and went to sit in the truck again. This is where things took a turn. He stayed in the truck for about 10 minutes. I couldn't continue to move anything by myself because it was all big stuff so I sat at the end of the trailer waiting. When he finally came out 10 minutes later he told me to move. I told him no. He told me to get up and help him or I could call a taxi and leave. I got up and said okay, I was going to call a taxi. He looked at me and said "so you're not going to help me then?" and I said "no, you told me I could call a taxi and leave so I'd rather do that." He jumped down from the trailer and went into the truck. I followed him but he locked the doors before I could get in. I asked him to unlock the door, he said no. I said I couldn't call a taxi because he had all my stuff, he said that wasn't his problem. So instead of arguing with him further I went to sit on the end of the trailer again.
When he came back out, which was about 10 minutes later again, he told me to move again. I said no. He was yelling at me to move and I just said no in a calm voice. I said I wanted to call a taxi but he wouldn't let me because he had all my stuff locked in the vehicle. He told me to move again and I said no. He told me to leave and I said that I couldn't leave because again all of my stuff was locked in the vehicle. I was still sitting on the edge of the trailer and at this point he started throwing things. He had some car parts that he'd started throwing against the wall of the trailer saying that it was under my credit card so it didn't matter what damage he did to it, I'd be held responsible for it. I still didn't move off the end of the trailer. He continued throwing things and yelling then he went into the car and got my purse and sweater and keys and literally threw them on the ground in front of me. I picked everything up and looked at him and asked where my phone was as I still needed to call a taxi. He ran to the truck and grabbed it. I followed him and was standing right in front of him. He could've just handed me my phone and be done with it but nope. He chucked my phone across the lot. It landed about 50 ft away but it had somehow come out of the case. The storage locker is just gravel on the road. I went to go pick it up and at this point I started crying. He looked at me and asked me if it was broken and at this point I lost my mind and just started screaming at him. I picked up my phone that surprisingly wasn't cracked but all the corners are now scuffed and scratched and my case is ruined.
We argued back and forth after that. I left to sit outside the storage locker facility. He called me and I called him a bunch of things that I shouldn't have. I eventually went back inside to help him finish moving everything and then we left. I was silent the entire ride home. He made a comment saying "wow you're really upset by the whole thing" and I didn't respond.
The reason I'm making this whole post is because the next day he said he talked to his therapist (who I've never met) and said that his therapist said that yes his actions were bad, but that I basically instigated the whole thing. I disagree and think he should be able to control his actions. So now I'm seeking an opinion.
If you got all the way through this I tremendously appreciate it! It means so much to me to be heard.
TL;DR - I was moving furniture with my ex bf, we got into an argument, he started throwing things and yelling, I asked for my things so I could call a taxi and leave, he threw my purse, keys, and jacket on the ground in front of me then threw my phone across the parking lot. Then the next day he said his therapist blamed me for 'instigating' the whole situation.
submitted by Unique-Poem-1490 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]